Well, someone has to do it.

Lets start with the ginger ninja himself, current Scotland and former Celtic boss Gordon Strachan. Never one not to ofer a short of a quick word ( velocity ) about Celtic, he chipped in with the unthinkable for the rest of the media.

Believe it or not, this is from the Evening Times;

Strachan: Celtic qualifying would be just

Champion for Scotland

It’s by Sports Group Writer Scott Mullen, if you look closely at his picture, you can see he didn’t have time to comb his hair after the editor hauled him off for an explanation.

Strachan, ahead of tonights crucial play off decider in Malmo, said;

” I think they’ll win. I don’t want to be like the Malmo coach and tell you what’s going right in the world and what’s going wrong.

“I just believe they have a good chance of doing it because they have good passers of the ball, Celtic. They have good counter attacking players.

“It’s a boost for us all because it’s a new journey, new games, a new focus. There’s a freshness and that’s what the players like. 

“If not, we’re off to ‘that place again’ and even the guys in the media have to write about that and try and make it interesting. It’s the same with the players.

“It can only benefit everybody.” 

Strachan was speaking after announcing the Scotland squad to face Georgia and Germany in the upcoming Euro qualifiers, which included six Celtic players, Gordon, Mulgrew, Brown, Armstrong, Forrest and Griffiths, which could see more Celts start in the Scotland team than o in the Celtic one.

Ewen Murray, the Guardian golf correspondent who occasionally, and mysteriously,  shares his thoughts on football, tweeted;

Repeating myself but find it odd there are 10 midfielders deemed better Scotland squad options than Charlie Adam. 

That’s because Strachan only picks ten midfielders for his squad. The manager wouldn’t struggle to find twenty better if he had to.

Mind you, Murray has tonights in depth analysis sorted;

Analysis plus analysis of Celtic v Malmo can’t hide fact that Malmo aren’t a very good team. Highly damning if Celtic eliminated by them.

Which is pretty much the line taken by the rest of the media. It’s all about the consequences of defeat, and not the spoils of victory.

We need some positivity, and where else to look but the man of the moment, Ronny Deila. He’s confident.

You’d have thought David McCarthy would have echoed that in his story;

 Ronny Deila last night insisted Celtic WILL win the biggest match of his life in Malmo to crash into the Champions League.

The Hoops boss led his squad to Sweden yesterday convinced his players are good enough to survive a £20million shootout in Swedbank Stadium to rub shoulders with Europe’s elite in the world’s biggest club competition.

Deila has no doubt his team, who lead 3-2, are better than Malmo – despite the confidence exuding from the Swedish camp after Jo Inge Berget’s last minute goal at Celtic Park changed the complexion of the tie. 

Insisted ? Against a tide of negativity from the hacks, no doubt.

Convinced ?  Even though the ” experts” are trying their best to tell him otherwise.

 Despite the confidence exudiing from the Swedish camp? Confidence ? They’re sqeualing like stuck, er pigs.

I’m going to rewrite that for him. To change the mood a little.

Ahead of Celtics clash with Malmo tonight, Ronny Deila reassured nervous  Celtic fans that it will be his side who triumph and take their place in the Group Stages. The Norwegian maestro roared ahead of the game; 

“ It is the biggest game for me and then the next one in Europe will be even bigger. This is a big game for the club and everyone, of course it is.

“We want to get to the Champions League group stage. If we win on Tuesday, we have succeeded in one of our first goals. So it is one of the biggest games of our season. It is very, very important.

“It’s like a final. But for me it is about getting better and better, If we get through, we can then show we have taken another step as a team. 

“We are well prepared and looking forward to the game. The goal is to win, of course.

“We are going to win this game. That’s the only thing I’m thinking of. We are going to Malmo to win.

“We can talk about the positive things. We have a very, very good chance. 

We are good enough to do it. It’s just about going out there and doing it.

“I am very, very positive. We haven’t lost away from for six months. We are coming here with a lead and we showed at Celtic Park we can cause Malmo problems. That’s what we are going to do.” 

It’s been a long campaign. Stjarnan and Qarabag seem so long ago, and it’s credit to the players, that apart from a brief spell at the end of the first Malmo game, that they have kept to the required level of performance, both physically and mentally. With each passing game, the Hoops are getting stronger, quicker and more confident.

 There’s no reason Celtic should lose tonight, not only on aggregate, but the game itself.

The much maligned defence has played five games, and only conceded three goals. All of which were down to a lack of concentration, and the Qarabag away game showed that they can concentrate fully when they need to. Tonight, of course, they will need to.

But what about the pressure , wailed the hacks, now genuinely worried that Ronny actually knows what he’s talking about, giving him an immediate advantage over them;

“Yes, I feel pressure all the time. When you have big goals the pressure is unbelievably strong. But that’s what you have to cope with when you are a player and a manager. You have to use your energy to get the best performance possible.

“Why should I be negative? I know the situation very clearly – we are 3-2 up! We showed in the first game we know how to cope with Malmo. If we get the best performance we have a good chance to win. That’s what I see and that’s what I go for. We are going to play a team that we’ll have chances to beat. We have a very, very good chance.” 

“We showed at Celtic we can cope with the team and we have skills in our team to win this game. That’s what we have to focus on. I think we’re a better team than Malmo. If I didn’t think like this we wouldn’t have a chance of making the Champions League.

“We will go to win the game, of course. But it depends also on the picture of the game and how the match plan is going. We have to defend well but also cause them problems.”

Deila continued, because, of course, the press commented on accusations from the Malmo camp that Virgil van Dijk may be a little less focussed than he should be with all the transfer speculation;

“His head is here with Celtic, that’s for sure. He has played very well in the recent games and he will be very motivated going into this one. I have no worried about Virgil whatsoever because I haven’t seen anything until now.

“He is focused. In the home game he was very good, especially in the first half. He was vital for us and he’s going to be very important for us in this game also.

“We don’t need to sell Virgil. Celtic is a big club and hopefully we’ll have van Dijk and Champions League at Celtic Park. 

Anyone who has seen the Dutchman’s reaction to Celtic’s goals in this campaign needs no re assurance on that issue.

Critics have said that van Dijk should have come clean and said he is staying, and his refusal to do so means he is away. Of course, there is the possibility that the manager is telling the truth, and that the defender just wants to concentrate on his game.

And the rest of the defence ? Ronny gave them a vote of confidence, as the vultures tried to imply it was a problem;

Our defence was the best ever in Scotland last year so it’s strange that I get these questions about the defence. 

There is a doubt over Mikael Lustig, who trained with the team last night. Ronny was forthright about his chances;

We will see tomorrow if he is ready or not. But we are taking him with us because he has a chance.

“He hasn’t done any work since he got the injury last week, just rest and treatment ” 

It looks like every opportunity will be given for Lustig to start. He is a class act, and for the biggest game of the season , it might well be worth the risk. There is a danger he will break down, but if he thinks he’s ready, we should go for it.

It’s not like he just stepped off a plane from South Africa or anything. At least if he plays the man who did just step off a plane will be on the bench, and to be fair to big Efe, he will give us his all if called on, and I feel a little better knowing there is someone of his experience ready to stand in if Lustig doesn’t make it.

Rather have the big Swede though.

The team , Lustig permitting, is pretty much set in stone for tonight;

Gordon, Lustig van Dijk, Boyata, Izaguirre, Brown Biton, Armstrong, Johansen, Forrest, Griffiths.

We may see Charlie Mulgrew at left back, offering a little more solidity, but he doesn’t have the pace to deal with Djurdic or Berget. He’s more likely to be added to the midfield later to calm things down and try to control the latter stages of the game. Gary Mackay Steven could also contribute later, as James Forrest will be tired and bruised towards the last third of the game. Kris Commons is another with a vital role to play, his guile again could be used to produce a goal or to hold up play.

 Nadir Ciftci has too much on his moind to be expected to start. He will be worried he hasn’t hit the ground running, but with so many interruptions due to suspension, he;s better left on the bench.

 Although you won’t need to check twitter for the team news. If he is picked you’ll just hear the howls of anguish. Ciftci may have something to offer Celtic yet. But not tonight. Perhaps he’ll step up a level when Libor Kozak gets here. Currently a rumour, but the Aston Villa striker, who hails from the Czech republic, has scored four times in fifteen games for villa over two years, is on a free and is usually injured. Seems like the usual junk we bring in at the usual price.

 He’s probably been texting his mates about the move already….

After Tonev, i think we should maybe delete the phone number of whoever it is we know at Villa.

 No, the task of getting the goals will primarily fall to Leaping Leigh Griffiths. The man on form.

As expected, he’s ready for it. and as for calling him names….

 “The only person who has called me a brat is my mum.

“They can say what they want about me or anybody else in the side, but we have got a job to do and we will go and do it.

“He was saying I was tugging his shirt, but there was nothing in it. I didn’t touch him once.

“He was the one pushing and pulling. I spoke to the ref and asked him to keep an eye on it.

“The assistant behind the goal also made it clear that if he saw him pushing me again he’d give a penalty for it, so I don’t know where their keeper was coming from with what he said.” 

Do the comments bother him ? Wouldn’t have thought so. He’s had a lifetime of being called names.

 “They know how good side we are. We proved that.

“We’ll go over there looking to punish them with anything that comes our way.

“They are just trying to wind us up a bit. But we are looking to win the game.

“They are just trying to play games with us. We aren’t going to fall for it. Teams will do that all the time. We have got to rise above it.

“The comments in the paper have just been silly. We know what we are. We are a good footballing side and hopefully we will go and prove that.

“Teams will always try to manipulate you and try and do stuff to get you wound up, but the manager will be cool, will be calm and he’ll have that instilled in us by the time we go out for kick-off.

“We knew because we won the game that they would come out and say stuff about us, but we know we’ve got a job to do and we will look to do that.”

Speaking of those comments, the Malmo boss has become the second visiting manager in this years campaign to have a go at the Scottish press.

Lost in translation: Malmo boss Age Hareide berates

Scottish media over claims Swedes labelled Celtic as ‘pigs’

 “If you travel abroad and you are going to write about players from Sweden or Norway or Germany or Spain or France, you have to learn the words.

“To play like a pig is to play dirty. It was a tough game but it was not a dirty game.”

Thumping his desk, Hareide added: “A pig is something else in English than it is in Scandinavia.

“It means something else in Scandinavia. It is not swearing in Scandinavia. So you have to have respect for other languages.

“That is why I am upset with the press, you just translate things and then put them in headlines.

“The only thing I want from the press is to tell the truth. You have to have respect for languages and the places you travel to, to pronounce things correctly.”  

He might have a point. Scots -and English-are notoriously monolinguistic.

I may have mentioned this before. Some time ago I was on a bus in Glasgow, and a fellow tried to tell the driver where he wanted to go. He asked first of all in /french, but the driver shrugged. He had another go, in what could have been Spanish.

 Still no joy. German-I recognised a word or two there, brought no result either, so he threw his arms up in despair and flounced off the bus. The driver looked at me , a little bemused.

” You know, we could all probably benefit by learning another language. “, I ventured.

” Didnae dae him any fucking good, did it ? “

Or, of course,Hareided  could be panicking and deflecting….aware that he is about to make himself look a bit of a prat.

Anton tinnerholm, Malmo’s full back , had a warning for the Hoops players when he referred to the atmosphere in the Swedbank stadium;

“I don’t think Celtic understand what awaits,” he said.

“Although they have good pressure at home, I think it will be something extra when they come here.

“Here you sing for 90 minutes.”  

Well, that’s us fecked then.

A lot will depend on the referee tonight. We saw in the first leg how Malmo would resort to kicking, tugging and whinging. We will need one who is strong and experienced.

Milorad Mazic, of Serbia is the man appointed for the game.

A former traffic policeman ?

No. Though he does seem rather more animated than most.

And he doesn’t seem to be a shrinking violet either. There’s not many who would do this;

You might remember him from the Scotland- Ireland game. When he tried to pull Roy Keanes ears off when he felt the fiery Irishman wasn’t listening to him. I distinctly remember him saying

“well, you’re not fucking using them. ”

I think he’ll be able to stand up to any bullying from the Swedes.

Right, who is Ronny getting last minute advice from, and what is it ?