All New Zombielines

Same old Alloa…always cheatin!

William MacSandwich, Kilwinning vine.co/v/OVplYzra5vb

See….I’m not so shite a manager after all!

Super Ally, Beechgrove Garden

I haven’t gone away you know….

Craigy Whyte, Motherwell

If I was judged fit and proper don’t you think I’d be in the bloody first team!

Davie King, Castlemilk

That’s fine Mr Traynor…..you keep sending us your statements and we’ll publish it under our names.

Matthew and Chris, Evening Times

Hey…don’t forget me!

Dick Wilson, BBC Scotland

Great progress under McCall, we used to dream about beating Livingston, now we dream about beating Hibs!

Zombies, everywhere

The solution to our problems? Headlines about buying some new players..always worked for David Murray

S McCall, Doldrums

Crisis, of course it’s not a crisis, my hair is meant to be this high!

Paul Murray, Worth It!

Can we stop playing you every week…

Alloa fans, Bored!

You have reached The Easdales, for an emergency loan, press 1.

Sandy plc, Greenock

Such consistency from Rangers; Sports Direct advertising, Sports Direct superstore…

M Ashley, The Bank

It’s up to the players to step up. No me obviously but somebody, Any more pies?

K Boyd, Couch

Nomad?…I don’t know any Rangers fans that are no mad! Try the lamb!

Andy Cameron, Edmiston Club Open Mic Night

Rangers are just lucky they appointed Stuart McCall. Ronnie Deila would have lost that game.

C Sutton, Norwich

Hi, its Kris Commons, yeah I miss Rangers, don’t Rangers fans?

K Commons, UrineExtractor

Hi, is that SARS? It’s me again….can I get the money back and I’ll just accept the jail sentence!

Davie King. Jo’Burg