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Celtic Diary Wednesday December 21: Slump Continues Unabated

One of the Glasgow radio stations, named after the river that flows through the city, asked listeners the other day if Celtic were in a slump. Or something like that. It’s what they do to stir up debate and claw back some of the listeners they have lost.

Celtic fans, myself included, can’t help themselves, and so they returned to their tried and trusted method with this latest vomit of nonsense.

The slump, as they referred to it, continued last night as a wiser Partick than the previous meeting had a go at Celtic and as a result, kept a nervous crowd nervous until the 1-0 win was secured. Scott Sinclair, returning from the assassination attempt on him by the Catalan TippyTappers swept in the only goal of the game, and although it was the only goal, and there was still over an hour to play, it was worth three points, as opposed to some goals this season which haven’t even merited a point on their own.

After returning to play his part in the  12th straight win for the team, the goalscorer said;

 “It felt longer than three weeks with the run of games we’ve had and the amount of games I’ve missed but it’s always nice to come back and get amongst the goals as well, so it’s great and hopefully I can keep building game by game again.” 

“It was heart-breaking because I haven’t been in a cup final for so long. The last one was five or six years ago when I got promoted with Swansea and that was just promotion, it wasn’t really silverware, so hopefully now I can look forward. We want to win as much silverware as we can.

“I still felt more involved because I played in all the games leading up to it and it didn’t feel as bad as it would had I only played a few. On the other hand, it’s great that we got the cup.”

It’s hard not to feel a little sorry for the guy, being stuck at home when he could be out there working.

Image result for helen flanagan

He continued…

“It was a little bit of a grind ( He means against Thistle, not his spell at home with the wife )and we didn’t really play as well as we normally do,” he said, “but we just go away and look at the positives and negatives and then go ahead game by game.

“It’s always going to be there. If we can keep playing the way we’ve been playing then hopefully we can keep going with what we’re doing and that’s winning games.” 

There was a debut for young Calvin Miller, who although a striker, came in at left back, and in doing so played well enough to prompt his manager to compare him with an England international, Ryan Bertrand, whoever he is.

: “I was delighted for a young player who has just moved position. I thought he did very well and he wants to learn and develop.

“I did a similar thing with Ryan Bertrand when I was at Chelsea. We took him in from Gillingham to Chelsea and he came in as a left-winger and in the same team was Scott Sinclair, who was a striker.

“I moved Scotty wide and put Ryan to left-back and he went on to play with England and won the Champions League with Chelsea and is now at Southampton and he’s an outstanding player.

“I see similar sort of traits in Calvin, where he can do that one position behind but he’s only 18 so he needs time to learn that position and role but he’s got some outstanding qualities and can offer the club something going forward.”

Shame he couldn’t see something in Dorus de Vries that would turn him into a goalkeeper.

All in all, its another three points in the bag for Celtic, and the relentless surge toward the title continues. It may not have been the most impressive performance of the season, or even the week, but it showed that players such as Miller, Henderson and MacGregor can come in and do a job when needed. Even Christian Gamboa semed to look a little more settled, and if I was an opposition manager, i’d frankly just take a big white towel with me to face Celtic, and hope it injured someone when I chucked it at them.

No doubt some in the media will see this single goal victory as a sign of this slump, but thats to be expected with a game against their favourites looming. After all, Scottish football needs a competitive “rangers ” to survive, and by saying that Celtic are doing badly, and their blue shirted boys are on the up, it might generate some interest amongst neutrals, when in fact there will remain very little.

Viewing figures suggest that the game doesn’t hold as much appeal as the one it replaced, and you can;t blame a desperate media for attempting to prove themselves right with their stubborn refusal to actually examine the facts.

One newspaper even offered two tickets to the Old Firm game as a prize in one of their competitions, and for any of you thinking of entering, should you in fact win, you can borrow this to get to the game in.

Image result for tardis

Another paper “understands ” that Robert Snodgrass won’t be given the chance to play out his childhood dream in the hoops, as although manager Brendan Rodgers has been alerted to the fact the player is ready to take a pay cut, he won’t be offered a contract.

Given the high level of accuracy in the Scottish MSM, we can confidently predict he’ll be house hunting in Bothwell well before the clocks go forward.

Despite what their “source ” says-and we believe their source is entirely free of the aroma of urine, so he can’t possibly be any good.

 “Snoddy has never hidden his desire to play for Celtic and he would have taken a massive cut in wages to make it happen but if he’s not wanted then there’s nothing much more he can do about it. The dream was to end his career playing for Celtic and winning trophies with them. But the word is that Brendan Rodgers simply is not interested so that is that.

“As much as Snoddy is a Celtic fan at least he knows now that the option of playing for the club is not going to be on the table. He can plan his future accordingly.”

Notice the player is referred to as “Snoddy”, to indicate the source knows the player quite well. Truth is, they chose this nickname instead of “Grassy ” because then we’d all have thought we were signing Lee Wallace, which in turn would have led to a few “rangers ” supporters jumping onto spiky railings again.

And probably a few tims as well, come to think of it.

Middlesborough are apparently desperate to offload Jordan Rhodes, which some think makes him a cert for Celtic and regular football, but as with Calvin miller, unless Rodgers sees him as a goalkeeper or something, there won’t be a move for him until Moussa Dembele leaves, though with the Frenchman now playing as though he’s had one of those phone calls from his agent telling him not to hurt himself and start looking for a new car, I wouldn’t write the idea off just yet.

Elsewhere, one of the iconic features of Scottish football has returned, casting suspicion that another icon hasn’t gone away, with this news…

Mark Warburton jets out to meet Jota as Rangers step up bid to land Spanish playmaker

The fabled Jet is back in business, presumably already swooping down on its target.

I misunderstood the headline, thinking the Chapeau’d chap had been flown out to Spain to collect his jotters, which would have explained why they are always skint.

Though there could be good news for Warbsy though, as the England under 21 job is up for grabs, and Level %, the official news agency of Glasgow, claims he’s on the short list, just behind Mike Bassett , England manager,

Image result for mike bassett england manager

and slightly ahead of Mike Batt, who wrote the Wombles songs.

Image result for mike bassett the wombles

The demand for Celtic and “rangers ” to include their under 20 sides in the senior league set up continued yesterday, and both clubs could agree to it as it means they won’t have to play the Motherwell under 20’s, who demolished their Aberdeen counterparts 9-1, and proved that it should be ability that counts, and not financial muscle.

Or, in the case of “rangers ” , financial desperation.

The article mentioned in yesterdays diary about the quest for the deadliest striker at ibrox was put into perspective when League sponsors Ladbrokes updated their goalscorers chart..

Only one of the four musketeers got a place, and he’s scored less in the league than any others on the chart.

Another wee goalscoring related fact is that if you add up all the positive goal differences in the league, together they amount to less than the goal difference of Celtic.

How good would we be if we had four strikers of that calibre instead of the ones we’ve got ?

Not very.

Two more wins before the long awaited Ibrox clash would put us on 55 points, and I wonder if those chaps at the Green Bigade could come up with some sort of banner to reflect that…I’ve seen a quite catchy logo somewhere, but it seems to have disappeared of late.

Ah well, soon be Christmas,and I’ve a works do tonight, complete with food and a free bar, but its important not to  forget those less fortunate than ourselves at this time of peace and goodwill.

The battle for Christmas number one in the Hit Parade is underway, with Celtic fans backing “Grace “, the heartbreaking ballad about Grace Plunkett, who married her man just before he was executed for his part in the 1916 rising, and “rangers fans backing the Dave King Five with their classic, apparently in honour of Joe Garner, who runs around and falls over for them. Its Called Glad To Fall Over, or something.

According to St. Leonard, on twitter, theres another battle between the bookies favourite, the all girl cabaret combo “Little Mix ”

 

Image result for little mix

as “rangers ” supporters have confused them with Republican band “Little Micks ” who have an entirely different songbook

Image result for leprechauns

Caption competition now, and yesterday we showed you this..

Steven Rowan December 20, 2016 at 12:48 pm · Edit · Reply →

Caption: Bitton sees his opponent wearing a head bandage and decides that it’s a shame to let it go to waste. 

Today, as previewed on the Etims twitter feed, we have this somewhat bizarre contraption, which demands explanantion..

High winds are forecast for the next couple of days, so if you are out and about enjoying or preparing for the festivities, take more care than usual, especially if you are in the area surrounding buildings which may be unsafe.

Image result for ibrox stadium

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D'Fhinnein Mick
7 years ago

CAPTION

Ideal for that post-Christmas lunch while Granny digests her sprouts.

corktim
7 years ago

joto signing on at rangers

Jez
7 years ago

Caption:-

‘Jim Traynor shows that Xmas spirit by providing Keith UnionJackson with a canister of his own Traynor butt gas in order that Keith can survive outside his natural habitat!’

Greenmaestro
7 years ago

Dave King joins an Ibrox board meeting from South Africa, using the best technology (their) money can buy.

Michael
7 years ago

Keith took drastic measures to cure his lamb addiction

Steven Rowan
7 years ago

Caption: a rare photo of the “rangers” Ugly Bastard Mask, used by players such as Davie Dodds and Terry Hurlock at official signing ceremonies.

D'Fhinnein Mick
7 years ago
Reply to  Steven Rowan

Got WINNER written all over it!!!!

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago

Caption : Mike prepares another Poem using his revolutionary Pure Mince Delivery System

Monti
7 years ago

Can you do any better like? Donkey boy.

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Top bantz Seamus.

mike
7 years ago

HAW HAW charlie McGraw,
he drinks his milk thru a plastic straw,
his looks no perfect,he!s no sae braw,
any mair aw that,
an i!ll tell yer maw,
HAW HAW.

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago
Reply to  mike

He he the bold Mikey replied
Took as a joke whilst Monti sighed
A poetic response in fine teuchter verse
Fairplay to Mikey Seamus can kiss ma erse

Monti
7 years ago

Charlie,
I like that lad Eron, tells it bang on the fucking money!

Jez
7 years ago

Caption:-

‘Scientists Make it easier for Kris Byod to write his newspaper column!’

Mike Annis
7 years ago

Caption: Either Level 5 are issuing shite again or Wallace has farted.

hector
7 years ago

Davie Dodds has put on weight

Jez
7 years ago

Caption:-

‘Daily Rectum sports journalists win the right to wear safety equipment at work!’

Monti
7 years ago

Caption: It has a head like a knob and eyes are too close together…..hmmmmmm
Is it Charlie saiz?

Funkyy
7 years ago
Reply to  Monti

No Monti, it’a a mirror!!! lol (trolling, trolling!!!)

Monti
7 years ago
Reply to  Funkyy

Ssshhh

Jez
7 years ago

Caption:-

‘Dave King finds a way to live with himself!’

I’m finishing now because the possibilities with this picture are endless!

7 years ago

Re the battle of the charts – all the profits from Grace go to the Green Brigade for expenditure on future displays etc and all the profits from Glad all over go to Dave Clark / his record company. Wonder if Mike Ashley has anything to do with Dave Clark / his record company?

D'Fhinnein Mick
7 years ago
Reply to  Andy Docherty

Recent news suggests that political displays are allowed.

Thanks,Barca!

Wonder if the club can claim a refund?

Wonder if the wankers who said that our Palestine display was an instrument to damage the club will,erm,find another reason to hate the GB and everyone who backs their initiatives?

7 years ago

With Celtic notching 12 straight wins , panicking tactical genius Warbo takes his magic hat to a new level

Rudebhoy
7 years ago

A minion getting off its tits.

SteveNaive
7 years ago

Celts took a calculated risk last night. Miller was unsure and muscled off the ball about four times . Lustily was okay bringing the ball forward but hesitant defending. Thistle got a break on the half way line second half, the winger moves forward in a diagonal at the stand ide and Lustig stays rooted in the six yard box instead of closing him down( no Thistle player was waiting the cut back) Guy has a go and drags it beyond the far post from ten yards. We kept possession well.passing and moving but then would give it away cheaply and invite them to press us. We should have converted more and Thistle one if they had a striker. I know we get nights like this but I thought BR had moved on from allowing such a slow tempo. For me Scott Brown was best again closely followed by the ’67 light show. Dembele was poor last night.

bgbhoy
7 years ago
Reply to  SteveNaive

dembele was poor? because he didnt score? his movement and his touch where a joy to behold, and he is extremely unselfish…

Rebus67
7 years ago
Reply to  SteveNaive

Steve et al,

I think Miller has a way to go in learning the defensive aspects of the LB job but there were some positive signs going forward. Need to see more of him to judge.
I thought Gamboa again and Henderson played well. Dembele sometimes has Scot Macdonald first touch…the ball bounces away from him and he loses it. His performance has shaded off a bit but there is more to his game than scoring. However, his value has been greatly exaggerated.

I find it difficult to assess the team because they are involved in too many games over a short space of time. Also, the team plus the formations change from game to game.

A one goal lead will be very difficult to maintain at Ibrox, so I hope we learn to kill teams off when we have the chance.

I thought Thistle were a good counter attacking team, but with no punch. Sorry, they did have some punch but it should have been called more often by the ref. the big centre was constantly sticking his hand in someone’s face.

Rebus

7 years ago

Why don’t sevco fans and little mix do a remix of goodbye to my ex and the huns can sing goodbye to my old rangers (sevco) sounds a better song to me.

mike
7 years ago

Caption, Ralphy wears his anti nagging helmet.

TonyB
7 years ago

Sandy Chugg dons his safety helmet when he hears that BARBARA’S coming!

Be afraid hun monkeys. Be VERY afraid.

SteveNaive
7 years ago

True enough Rebus, he held Lustig down twice at corners for them and gor headers in but the ref never called it. He could have, like others would have given , two penalties for ball to hand in our box so in that respect Anderson was fair. Bg bhoy of course it wasn’t because he didn’t score it was about his all round game which was poor…he is allowed to be you know. I watched him both on and off the ball and his movement wasn’t good, it was slow and ponderous, his link up play was at times good, especially with Sinclair and at other times very poor, his touch and vision not being as good as he has shown they can be.

Bgbhoy
7 years ago
Reply to  SteveNaive

I don’t know man I thought his play was good. He was redundant in front of goal but he came deep and tried to make things happen. He will need to start scoring though. Will Brendan play him next week?

Rob O'Keeffe
7 years ago

Good article Ralph.Back to your cheery self with some good belly laughs.

Caption : Warbo works out his “tacTics” on the back of a fag packet while wearing his “it wisnae me” disguise.KTF

Uralius
7 years ago

Caption: We get it you Vape.

Level 5 plant
7 years ago

Caption. Ralph pictured in Glasgow pub after Resolution 12 meeting goes badly!

Funkyy
7 years ago

Caption:- Jabba the dickhead takes no chances and wears a condom while at work.

7 years ago

Ralph,

I agree about the 1 goal results but I just wish it were different. The SMSM, “rangers” and all their cohorts just seem to be getting more and more grounds for attack. In to the bargain, it does not do my old ticker any good. At this rate I might struggle to see six never mind ten. For us, a win is a win but for others a close thing is a defeat.

Caption: “Stewart Regan borrows Peter Lawwell’s mask to gives his full attention to Res12”.

H H

7 years ago

Ralph,

That monitor really has it in for me at the moment. What’s wrong with him? Doesn’t he like Santa Clause?

H H

7 years ago
Reply to  Pensionerbhoy

Sorry Ralph. Just realised it will be the Christmas post. Comments not being delivered till next year.

H H

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago

Caption: TRIFC Inform the media that German International Bender has signed a 3 year deal only to later discover it was Bender from Futurama Fc

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago

comment image

7 years ago

Caption: Daily Ranker shows picture of Brendan under pressure due to recent slump.
GIRFUY HH

portpower
7 years ago

Caption:

Live coverage as sevco sign-up, The Man in the Ironing Mask.

mike
7 years ago

Feck the balls with boughs of holly,
fa la la la la,la la la la,
Tis the season of I M Jolly,
fa la la la la, la la la la,

See the bliddy fools afore us,
fa la la la la, la la la la,
Skelp the huns and join the chorus,
fa la la la la,la la la la.

mike
7 years ago

Santa wouldnt buy me a bhow wow,
santa woudnt buy me a bhow wow,
he said i wis a duck,
i telt him to get tae fuck,
he wouldnt buy me a bhoy wow wow.
So please remember a dug isny just fur Christmas and if yoo are Chinese dinny fuckin eat them.
Deck the bhows with awe shut up ffs.

7 years ago

I think some fans are forgetting that we are 14 points ahead and that BR has made multiple changes in each of the last 4 games of our slump. If we can’t rotate / bring in youth now, when can we?

The Charlie Saiz International
7 years ago

I think the Clyde boys are forgetting the amount of games we have had to play over our nearest rivals?
33 Competitive games with 9 of our current squad having played in 25 or over.
By comparison pretendy 2angers have played 25 games with 1 squad player playing in all 25.
Halliday.
Fatigue is a factor hence the reason we have had to rotate a few.
Also several injuries as well which have caused a bit of disruption.
It’s not a slump it’s purely a small drop off in terms of form whilst maintaining perfect results.
ie Wins.

Monti
7 years ago

Exactly!

mike
7 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Absolutely.

Vinnie
7 years ago
Reply to  mike

Indubitably! 🙂

Monti
7 years ago

Aontaím leat!!

portpower
7 years ago

At least there`s one good thing about winning by the one goal.

We`ll save money on neck braces when checking the linesmen or woman when we score.

johann murdoch
7 years ago

Caption
Sevco unveil special signing on mask for new “Timmy” players.

Monti
7 years ago

Just thinking there about this issue of the dodgy Ibrox roof…
As long as the Broomloan roof is ok …..

Ken

Vinnie
7 years ago

Great to hear Brendan’s news that James Forrest has recovered and may be available for the week-end. James and Paddy playing together started to look like a terriffic line-up and giving us extra options as they switched wings. I hold my hands up here; a year ago I’d have sold James for anything we could get and yet I was delighted with his start to the season. Aye, football’s unpredictable and often leaves you looking like a Don’s fan: sheepish. Anyway, we all want the best for the Bhoys, and, on his day James is surely that.
HH

Monti
7 years ago
Reply to  Vinnie

Vinnie,
Well said!

Vinnie
7 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Cheers, Monti, I’ve just logged on again as we’ve had company tonight. (RED,red,wine….)
It’s pretty much evident to all/most of our fans that we want everyone who ever has the privilege of wearing The Hoops, to succeed.
It doesn’t always happen. I will not name names here; it’s doubly harmful to do that; it benefits not the club, nor the individual.
However, I’d like to state something, just in case anyone was in any doubt about my allegiance:
Peter (TB) Lawwell is a cretinous, parasitical, Grade A, lying, cheating cunt.
“No margin in which to pay ‘inflated wages’ (including minimum/living wage) to low-level people;it would cost ‘the club’ over £300,000 and I will not sanction this.
MY salary/cost to the club will, of course, rise again this year; I’ve earned it, haven’t I????? JUST FUCKING WAIT.
What a cunt. What a tory cunt. What a masonic cunt? Go now. I want New Year 2017 to be minus yourself and every other tory, masonic bastard on the PLC. board.
FC not PLC and many thanks to the guy who coined this little pearl; I wish it wuz, but it WUZNY me.
HH

mike
7 years ago

Last Christmas I gave you my heart,
But the very next day, you gave it away,
This year to save me from tears,
I!ll give it to Brendan Rodgers.
WOOOOHHHOOOOOO.

portpower
7 years ago

Caption:

Cybermen of Sevconia ‘R’ us.

We are the Prototypes

Funkyy
7 years ago

Here’s a wee quiet tune…aka “The Trump song”.

https://youtu.be/dNKgF05F18w

Uralius
7 years ago

Naw Funky way off there. More like this.

https://youtu.be/EV-vU-HvlHI

Funkyy
7 years ago
Reply to  Uralius

Watch it…I’ve got some Cilla Black here!!!

Funkyy
7 years ago

Anybody remember this guy???

https://youtu.be/wMbQsKJ64S0

mike
7 years ago
Reply to  Funkyy

Naw so stick your pish vids where the sun disny shine,put oan some Puccini or sommit Operatic. with the emphisis oan the Tic. bit.

Funkyy
7 years ago

And here’s wan for Mike (auld mick Donald??)

https://youtu.be/AZwskb8_2H8

mike
7 years ago

Cheeky bhoy,better no meet auld Mike in a dark alley,i might be getting auld but i at least can still pay my round,no like some oan here.

Uralius
7 years ago
Reply to  mike

I’ve no been drinking with you Mike, but if I had you would be referring to me.

mike
7 years ago

Well that Hollyrood enquiry into young players registration was very illuminating.
McKay from the SFA admitting they did NOT have any procedures in place to register young players,nor does suprise,suprise the SPFL.
That is cos you are a bunch of self serving numpties,they are totally,totally out of date and completely out of touch,they couldny boil an egg.
Time for a complete clear oot,when youngsters are at the mercy of every perv.not to mention the rules,i said not to fucking mention it.

Funkyy
7 years ago

Afternoon Mike!!

mike
7 years ago
Reply to  Funkyy

Hello der Funkyy to be sure,to be sure,got all your presents bought?ready for Christmas mayhem?or are you gonny do the same as me,stick ma heed under the pillow and let the weans tickle ma feet.(after the cuddles of course.)

Funkyy
7 years ago
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