We should have seen it coming , to be honest, or perhaps we are that used to it by now that its just shrugged off and accepted.

The two players that the press would most like to leave Celtic, John Guidetti and Virgil van Dijk got a taste of the media at its finest and most impartial yesterday and today. It actually started before the game against Hearts, when Celtic ran out 4-0 winners against the first division leaders to advance another step closer to the treble-or quadruple, if you are especially optimistic.

Kilmarnock striker Michael Ngoo says

Celtic’s Virgil van Dijk set out to injure him

Scott McDermott in the Sunday Mail gave a platform to the Killie player to vent his fury at being taken out of the game after he had, er, spent a few minutes trying to take as many Celtic players out of the game as he could.

“I told our physio right away that van Dijk had tried to do me. Before the tackle there were a few words said between us.

“Then he came through the back of me. I think it was deliberate. I took off my sock in the changing room and there was a 
horrendous cut. I have the pictures to 
prove it.”

The bastard. Bet he never even called him afterwards;

“Van Dijk didn’t call me the following day and that was disappointing. 

Well, doesn’t that just take the biscuit. Going through the back of someone and not even calling them the day after. Still, theres plenty more fish in the sea.

So, its not too difficult to anticipate that any moment of controversy during the cup tie in the afternoon would see the laptop loyal condemn whichever Celt was closest to it. To their delight, it was Guidetti.

With Celts already one up in what was a competitve and entertaining start to the game-van Dijk had done his party trick of letting the ball hit his stationary foot and veer off into the net-John Guidetti tried to turn a Hearts defender to cut into the box, but slipped and fell. Its worth noting at this point that a number of other players slipped during the game. Perhaps the pitch was a bit slippy.

Willie Collum, the Mr. Bean of refereeing, decided it was a penalty, and Guidetti, playing to the whistle, just as every other footballer in the world would have done, tucked the ball away from the spot for Celtics second.

Kenny Clark, himself once a referee, asked ;

“If he slipped, why didn’t he get up and not cheat by not telling the referee?” 

Oh give me a break. Where has Clark retired to ? Lalaland ? Where little bunnies play freely in the sun, and beer flows from the kitchen taps ?

Fucking idiot. Collum made an arse of it. How about criticising him ?

Later it emerged that Guidetti had kidnapped Collums wife and kids and had threatened only to release them if the whistler awarded him a penalty at some point in the game. Well, it might as well have done, as the Swede has been villified beyond parody for his part in Collums mistake.

Neil McCann, who himself had to be restrained by police after Dunfermlines game at the weekend when something or other upset him, was besides himself with fury.

Guidetti dived and should be banned, he conned the ref, he’s been kicking guide dogs at the shopping centre, and so on, spouted Skys impartial and incoherent expert ( Are you sure thats the right word? -Ed . It’ll have to do, I can’t use fuckwit in case theres any kids reading -Ralph )

On the BBCs flagship Scottish football programme, Sportscene, former Hearts player and usually quite a decent pundit Michael Stewart forgot he doesn’t play for Hearts anymore, and gave us an amusing insght to what was probably going on in the Hearts dressing room post match with his rant, which predictably had guidetti diving and cheating. Then he made an appeal to the SFA;

“I would be surprised if the SFA compliance officer doesn’t take a look at the incident.” 

Not as surprised as I would be if there wasn’t already a letter winging its way to him from “Outraged of Corstorphine “

Hopefully, there will be no follow up from the SFA compliance officer, who only seems to watch the telly when Celtic are on, because a ban for Guidetti could make him realise what a pathetic organsation is running Scottish football, and he may decide to ply his trade elsewhere.

Oh, wait.

Guidetti, of course, didn’t even appeal for the penalty. Willie Collum, who has form for making an arse of it, just got it wrong. In fact, he got a few other things wrong in the game as well, but then again, he usually does.

He’s not a very good referee. Thats just how it is. When he makes a mistake that favours Celtics opponents, its an honest mistake and they even themselves up dontchaknow , and after all, he’s only human and its a difficult job that not many would like to do. And so on, and so on.

Of course, should the mistake actually favour Celtic, then the player is a liar, a cheat , a thief and quite possibly goes out beating up old ladies outside the post office on a Tuesday morning.

Collum also got it wrong when the Hearts keeper dropped the ball and Kris Commons scored for what would have been Celtics fifth. Collum -and the press, who seem to have forgotten this incident – will have adjudged Commons to have fouled the keeper, spat in his face and craftily slashed the back of his shirt with a craft knife.

Another moment of controversy saw an enthusiastic-if you read the papers- or attempted assault if you saw the game on Scott Brown by Hearts stand in captain Morgaro Gomis, which saw the Jambo sent off after just seven minutes.

The letter of the law merited a sending off. But maybe a yellow would have done, as the opening of the game was frantic, and Collum seemed to lose control of it fairly quickly. Had he taken action earlier, perhaps warning the captains to calm their teams down a bit, then maybe he wouldn’t have had to send Gomis off.

Still, it obviously affected the bug eyed bawheid, and if substitutions were allowed for referees, he would have been taken off and rested for a few years himself.  He went on to have a terrible game, and its no surprise that Guidetti is taking the blame.

Robbie Neilsen, Hearts manager wanted to speak to Collumm after the game about his performance;

 “I tried to, he wasn’t speaking to me.

“Some of them do, some don’t. I don’t know what the rules are, they change all the time. I’ve watched both incident. I’m disappointed with the outcome of both.

“Everyone knows what those decisions should have been, but the one man who makes the decision didn’t see it like everyone else.

“Here last week two Rangers players were booked for tackles that were far worse than Morgaro’s tackle. He went in and won the ball.

“We can’t really argue it because they have things they can say, like it’s reckless, or at pace.

 “But the penalty is the real game changer. I am more annoyed at that.

Asked if he thought Guidetti dived, Neilson replied: “The fact you’re asking me the question probably answers your own question, doesn’t it?

“I’m not going to try to get players sent off or booked retrospectively.

“We can only focus on ourselves and, from my point of view, it was the wrong decision.” 

 Neilsen has every right to be annoyed. The penalty was a terrible decision. But it was down to Collum, not Guidetti.

 Despite a history of genuine incompetence, not bias, as some would say, Collum is repeatedly touted as one of Scotlands finest, which in itself is not necessarily  anything to shout about, but shows that there is a level of protection afforded by the SFA to its employees which would be commendable in any other industry-except probably airline pilots-that is in danger of bringing the games reputation even further into the gutter.

The SFA, colluding in the demise of the Scottish games reputation. Who would have thought it ?

But, as Jock Stein would have said, if you are playing well enough, the referee doesn’t matter.

Celtic did play well. The passing was better, the finishing has improved , and Efe Ambrose has slotted back into defence without a problem. Nir Bitton in the Charlie mulgrew role meant that theres a chance it will soon be the Nir Bitton role.

Whilst Mulgrew is a valuable player to the club, Bitton is a better player, and his presence allowed Brown and Johansen to be more effective with their hustling and  harrying game.

Thing is, Hearts are nine points clear of their closest rivals in the first division, unbeaten at home this season. Last week, they beat Second Rangers quite comfortably to make the possibility of the Ibrox club not ascending into the top league a real issue.

Hearts played well. They raised their game a wee bit after the sending off, and it didn’t alter their style too much-the two lines of four defenders meant that Celtic still spent most of the game trying to break them down, but the gulf in class between the two teams was glaringly obvious.

And thats scared the shit out of the media, because its dawned on them that the upcoming all-Glasgow League Cup semi final isn’t going to be anywhere near as competitive as what they had hoped.

One thing evident yesterday was the pace that Celtic play at compared to their lower league rivals. Looking at the earlier game, where Second Rangers beat Kilmarnock 3-0 in a game that appeared to be played behind closed doors, then its threatening to be embarrassing for the Ibrox club, and all their admirers.

Which naturally leads to the thought that Ally Mccoist will walk away before the Semi final. He was lauded by the Celtic support yesterday, as they sang asking for him not to be sacked, and McCoist will not fancy a repeat of that when he’s actually in the ground. Especially if his own support are singing for his head.

I know he is extraordinarily well paid, but surely even Sleekit Ally has some pride and dignity.

He’s got a wee shop in the town-I forget which one-which will provide him an income away from the game anyway.

That fear of what will happen in the New Year  might explain the hysteria in the written and spoken media this morning. Of course, it could also be that they are all just tossers.

Make your own mind up.

.

Ronny Deila had every right to be happy with yesterdays game.

 “It was a calmer afternoon than I would have expected before the game. I knew it would be tough.

“Of course, the sending off made the game different, but it was good we kept up the tempo, and we had very good reactions in the team. We had good pressing, got the four goals and a comfortable victory in the end.

We talked a lot before the game about how the pitch here isn’t as big and they will want to play. We needed to be together over short distances and be very aggressive, and we did that as they didn’t really have the ball, especially when they went down to ten men. So that discipline and team spirit was very good.”

“I had been thinking a long time about this game as I knew it would be important and hard, so I’m feeling really happy and relieved, knowing that the goals are still in sight. We are going to have a fantastic spring no and I hope we get a home draw as that will be an advantage of course.” 

We had full control of the game so the red card was important than the penalty. I expect us to win every game but it’s also important that the strikers score goals.”

 At the end of the game, Deila joined his players in saluting the support.

 “It’s important we do that and show appreciation to the fans. There are no other fans that I know that have such numbers or are as fantastic as the Celtic fans. We need to show how grateful we are.” 

Of course, that was what he said in public. And you know he means it. In fact, to steal from Mikeybhoy67  on twitter, it “smells like team spirit. ”

However, I used to know a lass who works at GCHQ, the government listening post in Cheltenham. and she sent me an excerpt from the  transcript of a call that Ronny made to a mate in Norway after the game. Well, she says it is, anyway.

Dvs mini hunerne behandlet , De var Pish . Se når vi spiller sine fettere i det nye året , vil vi jævla ødelegge dem .

Its impossible not to like Deila as a person, as a manager he still has a ways to go, but gradually he’s getting there. I would hate to see him fail, but worry if he’s capable of success. But, I’ve got my seat on the rollercoaster, so we’ll have to see how it ends up.

After all, we’re still in four trophies after a shocking start, so he is doing something right. I just hope he knows what it is and keeps doing it.

Or maybe I should just lighten up.

On to more important matters now, and the stories of steward inaction at Celtic Park during the Salzburg game. Theres nothing worse than finding someone in your seat when you get there, especially if they have been suitably refreshed beforehand. I had a wee chat with liason officer John Paul Taylor this morning, and he agreed that there did seem to be a few issues around Thursday game, more so than usual.

His job is to sort that sort of thing out, so if you did have a problem, then email him now-before you finish reading this-give him the details and get him to look into it.

:jptaylor@celticfc.co.uk  

If the stewards aren’t doing what they are supposed to, maybe he can track down the guilty parties and deal with it. Maybe a kicking in the car park and a good rub down with sand paper.

Or, more likely, and probably less controversially, he’ll make sure that the stewards do what they are supposed to be doing, and not hiding in the stairwells.

Want a chuckle ? Have a look at this guy, a furious Hearts fan who raced towards the itch, though with not quite the same result as the supporter who attacked Neil Lennon in the dug out;

Hearts fan fury

By the way, a picture emerged over the weekend of Second Rangers player Ian Black involved in a ,asonic style handshake with the match referee, provoking cries of some kind of masonic pro-Ibrox conspiracy.

Thats , of course , clearly nonsense. Thats not a masonic handshake, and there are no links with Second Rangers and any kind of mystrious underground organisation.

That was a different club.

And a different handshake.

Oh, by the way, Craig Whyte, recently arrested over his involvement when Dodgy Dave Murray-sorry, did I spell “Sir ” wrong ?- has released a statement which outlines how he feels about the whole ordeal;