And we’re back in the room…
In 1890, Henri Poincare proposed the Poincare recurrence theorem, which postulates that a system will return to its original state after a sufficiently long amount of time. Theoretical physicist Don Page used the theorem while discussing information loss in black holes and asserted that the Poincare recurrence time for a system as massive as the visible universe is 10^10^10^10^2.08 of any unit of time: seconds, Planck times, millennia, whatever…the number is so large that units are frivolous. This means that if you waited 10^10^10^10^2.08 millennia, long after all stars have died, all matter is devoured by black hole singularities and subsequently ejected, leaving the universe as a barren waste of Hawking radiation, you will see the universe reset itself into what it is today, with the Milky Way, our solar system, the Planet Earth, all of its creatures, all of our technology, culture, and political affiliations, and I’ll still be waiting for Now TV to connect me to the internet.
Well, they finally got around to it, and that means we’ve got a Diary today.
I’m going to start with a hypothetical story, one which has kind of attracted a bit of attention on twitter.
Lets suppose a young man wrote to sevral clubs looking for a coaching position, and received a hypothetical reply, offering him a position in a hypothetical non Scottish city to train and develop some hypothetical youngsters.
Hypothetically speaking, he would have been asked to put a few quid into the venture himself.
The parent club behind this scheme, if there would have been one, may have only had hypothetical money in a hypothetical bank, and when the time came for our hero to be paid, its probably a good job he didn’t have a hypothetical mortgage.
Anyway, after an unspecified period of time-which is also an abstract concept, he decided that he wasn’t happy in the voluntary sector and moved to a land far, far away to take up another job.
Hypothetically speaking, of course.
And yet somehow I’m the bad guy for pointing out their club is on the slide again.
There have been a number of rumours about the financial health of “rangers “, ranging from pre pack admin after the split to creditors being told they’ve got the wrong number when they ring asking for money all the way up to don’t worry Dave King will invest in the summer.
At least one of those is complete bullshit. And we don’t need Columbo to help us work it out.
So, before there’s a shortage, get your jelly and ice cream in.
And spare a thought for those poor, gullibilly fools who may end up buying two lots of season books this year…
We did try to warn them…
And we do get some things right you know… from the diary of December 20 last year..
We are fully aware, however, that there will be a dearth of centre halfs at Celtic. As we have said, Boyata doesn’t want to stay, Simunovic feels we’re beneath him and Sviatchenko will be gone as soon as he’s finished packing.
News broke today that Boyata is in “no rush ” to sign a new deal
The Belgian “defender ” said..
“I’m not in a rush. Of course, being there, it’s good, but I don’t know what is going to happen in the future.
“It doesn’t really depend on them or even me, we will just see what happens.
“At the moment, we are still talking about it. For the moment, I am a Celtic player and I love Celtic.
“It’s a great team, I love to be there. Whatever happens next, we will see, but for the moment I cannot really say anything about it.”
One can only conclude he has already said exactly what he intends to do…
Ryan Christie, on the other hand, is in talks for a new deal.
With Celtic, as his doctor has warned him that carrying Aberdeen for all this time has put undue pressure on his spine, and may alter his physical profile in years to come.
Manager Brendan Rodgers has been dropping hints that he’d like to keep Oddsone Edourd after his loan expires in the summer.
We have to respect he’s a PSG player, not a Celtic player. There is a clause in the deal and there has been an agreement – but we would need to trigger the fee.
“There’s a lot to do in terms of the bigger picture, too. He’s a fantastic player and we’ll see between now and the end of the season. But he’s settled in well and if we have any chance to do something at the end of the season then we can look at that.
“Because his representatives aren’t running about throwing him to every club under the sun, it doesn’t mean he’s not a top player. There’s no propaganda around him, but he’s a top talent.”
The young French contingent at Celtic is significant. It could help us lure others to Scotland, and they’re bound to have a couple of decent defenders somewhere.
Their under 21 captain, Abdou Diallo went from Monaco to Mainz last year for £5m….
I’m sure we have a scout looking st the rest of them.
As for another keeper, and we need one, Trevor Carson has reminded us he wants to play for Celtic. The motherwell keeper may not be completely off the radar since the move for him last winter fell through…
“Once it was done, I just got my head around it straight away and that was me moving on,”
“I took the positives and I found myself working a bit harder because I thought it might happen again, so be ready and give yourself the best chance.”
“Me and my missus played a game of ‘let’s see what we could have bought, let’s see where we could have gone on holiday’,”
“I haven’t earned big money, I’ve been at lower-league clubs. I’m turning 30, it would have been life-changing money. Football’s such a short career as well; you’ve got to look out for yourself and your family.
“It was disappointing but it didn’t happen. I was trying to explain to (Rachel), the window’s actually shut now. She was like, ‘It might still happen’. I said, ‘No, that’s it, done, so put all them catalogues back’.”
We’ll see.
Things aren’t always what they seem to be…
Pictures of tv host Ant MacSomething have shown just exactly how drunk he was when he decided he was too drunk to walk home before smashing into someone elses car.
He’s one half of talentless Geordie duo Ant and Dec.
For those of you who don’t know which is which, Dec is the one on the right and Ant is the one in the wrong.
This episode has led to a number of French under 21 players taking Olivier Ntchams car keys off him.
And dumbass of the week ?
and so it is…
Elsewhere, it appears the prawn sandwich munchers are getting on the great Jose’s nerves..
- Club consulting with fans via survey after Mourinho criticism
- ‘Our view is that ideally initiatives should be fan-driven’
They could turn the stands around to face the indoor ski centre.
Or, simply, just bring the prices down to a level where you don;t have to sell the car to go to a game.
Are you reading this, Mr Lawwell ?
Football is nothing without fans.
Might want to bear that in mind when you throw your weight behind Neil Doncaster…..
Caption competition on Monday..
Can you do better ?
