I got the date right today. Yesterday was a typo.
Thanks for your kind words yesterday, helped me deal with what was a bit of a shock.
And now, back to the nonsense.
Its odd how we deal with things, another mate of mine found out his wife was having an affair. He dealt with it by turning to religion, and along with a few of his new moslem friends took solace in publicly stoning her.
The Daily Mail were the first paper to more or less confirm that Brendan Rodgers will take up the managers job at Celtic;
Celtic have made a formal job offer to Brendan Rodgers as they look to appoint the Northern Irishman as their new manager.
The former Liverpool boss has been locked in talks with the Bhoys this week as both parties look to thrash out a deal for the 43-year-old to replace Ronny Deila.
Celtic have now formalised their proposals and waiting on a response from Rodgers.
One or two others half heartedly followed suit, and by the end of the day we’d even found out how Celtic were going to be able to afford his not inconsiderable salary…
NumbNutsWe can afford Rodgers. Give him a loan that isn’t a loan to avoid paying tax and NI, hide that from HMRC and SFA, cross-fingers etc.
It appears that Dermot Desmond will be underwriting the salary-or around two thirds of it -and Brendan will pick his money up a Gallowgate bar every second Tuesday afternoon.
The Mail elaborated a wee bit more..
Celtic hope to unveil Brendan Rodgers as their new manager early next week – and are willing to hand the former Liverpool boss a £15million budget for transfers and wages to rebuild the squad.
Rodgers has been offered a salary and benefits package which would make him the highest-paid boss in the club’s history.
One figure mentioned has been £48,000 a week, poor by English standards, but certainly not a poor wage.
The bold and decisive move by Celtic to hire a manager with a reputation in Britain is encouraging. It shows that Desmond is now actively involved, especially if he’s crowdfunding the wage, and we may see an end to the scattergun approach to signing players, and perhaps a little less interference from anyone who doesn’t have “Manager , Celtic FC ” on his office door.
Rodgers will command respect amongst the squad, and will no doubt remove swiftly anyone who starts to undermine him.
We hear he’s already had a word with Kris Commons…
and has warned him about the shape he’s in…
Former Liverpool striker Luis Suarez, the man who added bite to Rodger’s Liverpool side, speaks very highly of his former boss..
“He is one of the best coaches in Europe and I am not surprised he is looking to get back in to the game because it is a game he loves.
“I am glad he has taken his time since leaving Liverpool. He should only be looking at the top jobs, with the top clubs, who will be playing Champions League football.
“If it was not for Brendan, then I know I would not be the same player that you see at Barcelona today.
“Such a big part of my education is down to him and his management.
“Of course he works to make the team stronger but he really works on a one to one level with the players.
“He will sit down with each player at the club, and work on where you can improve, where you can exploit opposition, he leaves nothing to chance.
“He is a very intelligent man. If the players at his next club listen to his words, they will become better players for sure.”
Already endorsed by one of the worlds best players, it was time to ask one of the worlds best managers what he thought…
‘I worked with him at Watford. I was the academy manager and he came in as manager. So I know Brendan fairly well. He is very organised, very meticulous, very knowledgeable. A good man-manager.
‘He almost won the Premier League. He has a good background, coming through the youths with the Chelsea academy and then through Watford and Reading and Swansea and obviously Liverpool. I am sure he will be a big asset for whatever club he joins.’
Warburton said he wouldn’t hesitate to recommend a switch to Scottish football if Rodgers ever sought his view.
No doubt Warburton was the go-to man for Desmond as he sifted through the job applications…
Actually, who knows, maybe Rodgers will seek advice from Warburton. How else will he know where to park his car at Ibrox next season ?
Never mind what anyone else thinks. for Celtic to get Rodgers is a declaration of intent.
No more projects, no more rookies.
It looks like, or at least I hope this is what it is, a serious attempt to regain some credibility on the European stage.
It’s certainly given the support something to look forward to, something to carry us through what otherwise would have been a dull summer dreading the Champions League qualifiers.
Reality is, we really couldn’t have got much better, and it could even be argued that Desmond has pulled off a coup.
In other news, the hordes of darkness can’t just sit back and enjoy a Cup final weekend. Not without moaning about something in their own unique, and somewhat hypocritical way.
As we have seen, they like to remind the world that they are, in fact, a Newco-new company-which, of course , comes in quite handy when the debt collecters ring up.
So, when bookmakers Betfred advertised their special offers for tomorrow, you’d have thought the gullibillies would have been pleased…
Apparently, they don’t like being a newco any more-so any creditors reading might want to start ringing them- and one or two of their support reacted in their usual relaxed manner.
And Betfred, to their eternal shame, backed down…
Doesn’t anyone have the balls just to tell them to grow up and fuck off ?
Meanwhile, Celtic have stepped up their own marketing campaign with another new brand…
Oh, alright, its not a new campaign. Cigarettes, unlike drink or gambling, actually kill people, whereas the other two just make peoples lives a misery.
But does anyone remember them ?
Gambling and the drink killed one of my mates, come to think of it, when he was hit by a Guiness truck outside Ladbrokes.
The BBC’s Pointless- ( yes, we know-Ed ) a programme where the aim is to lose all your points for some reason has an Etims contributor playing the game this evening.
The endlessly tall El Cormaco is on tonights show, and we have a sneak preview of how he looks on the box.
Jimmy Bee won the caption competition yesterday, with the topical “Evidence of the gagging of Yorkshire Police over the miners strike comes to light ”
Today, have a think about this one…
Caption,good education at our flagship school in larkhall.Was a bit apprenshive about Rodgers,but agree it will be good for our club,Taxi for lawell yet.
Great news if true about BR, hopefully all fans will now be pulling in the right direction, at least anyway, till he loses a game and is considered a dud. He’ll need to realize quickly that certain legacy players from NL squad ,believe it’s their birthright to start every game or the toys are coming out the pram. HH
Caption: Has the Queen just walked in the classroom.
Schoosh,
If Ronny Deila was a ” Soccer Sensei ” how would you term the far superior Brendan Rodgers?
Wax on Wax off Daniel son….
There you go M, the guy wouldn’t know a manager from a dog turd. Any manager apart from the ‘sensei’ would get my full and unequivocal support.
Until we are papped out of Europe?☘☘☘☘
Caption: Trump makes his first change after being elected
Caption: “Now children, how much higher than “Rangers” will Celtic finish next season?”
‘President Trump makes a small change to the pledge of allegiance in American schools’
Caption – Newco Rangers announce plans to devlop into the lucrative white supremacist american market.
We wait with interest the new Autobiography by R.Deila,my two years of hell in Paradise (noo there is a contradiction).
Assisted and ghost writen by Keech Jackson and serialised in the Daily Scumbag.
Nabody likes me and everybody hates me he screams,the players,the staff and the supporters.The players widna train or diet,the staff plotted against me,so i had no option but to form cliques with my favourites and to sook up Peters erchie.
But i will always love the Tic.and support them evermore.
If you wish to read mair then make a small donation to the Mikey and Ralphy Res 12 fund care of E-Tims.To be continued.
Caption, Nicola and Swinneys new Educational advances take shape as they add to the SNP membership campaign.
Caption: Ronny Deila enters this American classroom on his ” Soccer Sensei ” USA tour,
Teacher asks, ” Class do you have a message for our Norwegian guest “?
Class-” Yes Miss, Deila out “!!!
Hahahaha!!
Episode two,Ronny wakes up after a hard days sunbathing on Marbellas beach.He shouts out to Keech,get me that wee prick
Montis address,you ken the wan the wan that was always calling Ronny oot,and get me Bgbhoy and his faithers address.We need to extract some kind of revenge for all my mental turmoil,ok boss says Keech i will put my best mahn Graeme Spiers onto it right away.
Find out the result of Ronnys revenge by making a small donation to the Res 12 fund courtesy of E=Tims.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WINNER
Caption: Teacher – ” Class, we have a visitor today all the way from Dundee, Scotland”
Class – ” Out “!
Caption… young sevco supporters get in the groove.
Big Yogi is now available and won’t cost a penny. That makes sense to me.
Why?
Was just trying to stir it up!
with 2 different usernames?
Belter
Caption: Kids successfully predict the projectile of an Aiden McGeady cross
Caption, the Monti and Andy show courtesy of the BarL,educational class of 1967.Whit a year that wiz.
I was born in ’71, same year as the Phoenix emerged….
Is it the Larkhall Academy pupils’ rehearsal for their production of
Springtime for Warbler?
There’s an Academy in Larkhall????????????
Surely a misnomer.
Maryhillbhoy,
Charlie Saiz should be able to confirm that, remember getting is related to the McStay’s….cough.
Where is Charlie Saiz anyway? Blackpool pleasure beach must be busy….
He is,rather than getting
caption apprentice bigots learn the red hand of ulster salute its their kulchur you know
Trump Youth singing Hail to the Chief.
Caption, US Kids Heil their new President Trump as he visits his newly introduced policy of whites only schools….forgetting this has already been piloted before, and it didn’t end well then either!….there was no truth in the rumour that Nigel Farage was standing shoulder to shoulder with Trump as the photo was taken.
Episode three, Ronnys going ballistic,with the empheses on the tic bit. The Ayrshire Tims have formed a secret society,called the Forresters.They all lock doon in solidarity with Bgbhoy and his faither(the auld cynic).They swear a secret oaf of allegience,nabody can reveal there address,if they do,then they will be marched doon tae the bigotdome and forced to sing nae surrender in a high sea tone.
Ronny suffers a breakdown,Keech canny console him,will he ever recover?To find oot mair then make a wee donation tae the Res 12 guys care of E=Tims.To be continued.
‘Oaf’ of allegiance??? Hahahahaha!!!
Caption:
Shurley some mistake Nazi salute you reckon? Red Hand of Mississippi!
🙂
Ah! Celtic fags. Used to buy them from the wee kiosk just inside the gates near the Celtic end of Janefield Street. Made by the Co-op at their factory in Shieldhall in the late 60s and 70s. Absolutely rotten but at least you got a draw out of them.
Caption: School kids show what they thought was about the true size of a certain pointless contestant.
Liftedinmoscow it’s a football,I win. Pedantsruscsc.
He hasn’t accepted the job yet and we don’t have any confirmation from Celtic that he has been offered it. Surely you have learnt enough not to run with a story which roots lie in ‘The Daily Mail understands…’ The next line should always be ‘bugger all’. Say nothing until he is standing out side Celtic Park waving a scarf and talking about how his Uncle Paddy brought him here to see Paul McStay! ‘It has always been my dream…there is only one club I have ever wanted to manage’ You know the score. If Mojo taught us nothing else that even waving a scarf and talking about your love for Celtic is not even a 100% guarantee.
I still can’t see it happening. Why no press conference today at 5.00pm Steal the thunder completely from the Scottish Cup Final, making it the second biggest football story in Scotland this weekend. The way David Murray would have done it to us back in the day. Now that is what the PR department at Celtic should have done. Is there a PR department at Celtic Park? Hence Tuesday will come and go and the manager will be announced next Friday and it will be Neil Lennon. Nice and cheap. he will get the most out of some of the players we already have, bin others and spend nothing on replacements. And we will still win the league. We won’t be in Europe in September but we don’t really expect to be any way and the guys who have disappeared for the past few years can return to watch a team in blue playing at Celtic Park, possibly twice in a season and they will be happy to have someone to really shout at, other than Celtic players. Some of us just won’t bother
Wrang side of the bed this morning? Cheer up ffs itt could be worse you could be a Hun. Happy Friday everyone.
Happy Friday everyone,except the Huns.
Hail Hail
Episode four, Charlie S wakes up at his Blackpool Beach Condo,scratches his heid,finds a plook,squeezes it,rubs his baws and marches doon the stairs,where he finds his uncivil partner Monti waiting in the kitchen.Would you like some oats for your breakfast Charlie saiz Monti,naw yer alright darlin saiz Charlie,im meeting Ronny at the beach later,we might go for a game of soccer sensi,so dont wait up darlin,till later hun.Naw problemo saiz Monti,il be playin with masell on the xbox all day.
If you want to find oot what Charlie, Ronny and Monti get up to,make a small donation to the Res12 bhoys,courtesy of E=Tims.To be continued.
Caption: “Indicating Trump’s height by using their arms, American schoolchildren chant: Donald Trump? I didn’t know they stacked shite that high!”
Caption:”Trump? Shite up to here…”
Rodgers 4-3-3 (preferred)
Gordon
Lustig/Sviatchenko/Simunovic/Tierney
Armstrong/Rogic/McGregor
Roberts/Griffiths/Christie
Defence is not Rodger’s strongpoint but who cares? I’d rather win 4-2 than 2-0, it’s more entertaining. Can’t wait.
Episode five,When Ralphy met Ronny.
It was a dark wet night in Swindon,there wisny many members in attendance at the Swindon Celtic Supporters Gay Bar.
Ralphy was in wearing his new Gold Lamey suit,finished of wit a pink shirt and crocodile boots,hoping to catch a glimpse of his hero Ronny.Hector,Desi and Elcormaco were grouped in a darkened corner,trying to stay hidden from there wifeys who didny ken that they swung baith wyes.
Finally Ronny arrived,wet musty and smelling a wee bit whiffy,he had on a pair of incontinence pants a result of a small accident he had while talking to some Cellic supporters.That didny mater to the bold E-Timmers,who were used to reading mair pish than what went doon Edinburgers lavvies.
To find oot whom paired of with whom and which dirty bassas had a threesome,then make a small donation to the Res12 bhoys,courtesy of that dirty bhoy Ralphy.Aye mibbe continue or mibbee no.
Are you on Devoy’s meds today mike?
Andy, what a brilliant, brilliant day,youngest sons 40th birthday,Granddaughter 6 performed at the Perth festival,in the Saint Johns Kirk with her School (Kilgraston)she sang like a bird,alongside her class.The music was jaw dropping.
Elcormaco,won the pointless trophy with Lisa his friend with a near perfect score,on pointless and just to top him the club announce Brendons appointment,it does not get any better than that.HAPPY,HAPPY DAYS.
Great stuff mike, it feels like Celtic again.
We needed this, no more cowering Celtic teams, it’s take off time.
Absolutely brilliant,Dermot put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a big,big rabbit.You are so right Andy yes we most definately needed something like this to get the support back and joined back up,thank god.
Oh happy days.
Things can only get better.
Caption: We are ra people!
Or: Hey, teacher! Leave them huns alone
Caption……. All together class…
Davie Dodds the Elephant man
Da’avie Dodds the Elephant man
Davie Dodds the Elephant man
Da’avie Dodds the Elephant man.
Pulled off a coup? What these rich types do in their own private time has nothing to do with us, Ralph.
A few cow’s have pulled me off in my youth….
Caption: Campbell Ogilvie walks into the classroom to use the shredder, teacher say’s ” Class, can you point out an EBT”?
It’s official – Celtic FC have announced it – Welcome Brendan Rodgers!
Rodgers is our new manager, hip hip hooray!!!
YA BEUTTTY,the Dancer, Chancer,Prancer,welcome home,welcome, come on in and join the club.Welcome to the Celtic Brendan,what took you so long.
You feckin bueaty,the Brendan Bhoy.
fucking over the fucking moon, welcome Brendan Rodgers
Welcome Brendan to the Celtic family, away on the razz now, ya beauty!!!
Absolutely brilliant news
WELCOME BRENDAN
HH
Yes yes and fucking yes
Typical Jim White on sports news, they have launched a poll and seemingly only 50% of us want Brendan….so was that only 2 people that voted then…one aye and one no…he is a dick of the highest order!!!
The war is over the rebels have won.
Brendan will bring back the glory of how a Celtic team should play.
Enjoy hoops fans here we go 10 in a row.
HH
XBOX ON………:)
@Fuckingdelighted.com
i heard brendan is pally wae peter the pointer
now give us the statement on res 12 celtic tell the cheating bastards they are cheating bastards COYBIG
Firstly, Ralph, really sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. I lost a really close friend just under 8 years ago and think of him often. I just dwell on all the laughs (piss-takin’) we shared and thank my lucky stars I met him.
In my experience, acquaintances are 10 a penny but real friends are few and far between.
Now, onwards and upwards. I’m over-the-moon about Brendan Rodgers’ appointment. I thought we may get led up the garden path here and then landed by some (other) cheap option. I reckon Brendan’s the real deal. A Tim with a social conscience who can think tactically and get the best out of what he’s got in the dressing room. Can’t wait for the new season at Paradise.
HH
Welcome Brendan Rodgers! Hail,hail…
I watched Pointless tonight and elcormaco nearly won it. He was the last man standing. He and his partner contestant won the Pointless trophy and they just missed winning £3250. He got the only pointless answer of the night. Nice fella and intelligent but what do you expect from an Etim? He’s very tall…good centre forward or centre back. Well done elcormaco and Luisa. Cracking performance, close but no cigar but you got the silverware!
Fantastic news!
Welcome to Paradise Brendan.
We’re Celtic supporters…….
ffs another rumour in the pub steven gerrard coming over as a player coach to learn aff brendan
ffs noo they are saying big zlatan is coming ime away hame for a lie doon ha ha
Thatll be Commons away then….
Elcormaco,well done big mahn,heed and shooders above all other contestants in every way,well done to your good self and your friend the lovely Lisa.
A pointless trophy winner as well as a true tim with a social consieonce,doing first class work,with socially deprived people.I raise my cap to you and congratulate you and Lisa,on a wonderful performance.Carlos Alberto,wooft a pointless answer.Well done youse.
Brendan Rodgers is a football sensei
Ok I will give the new guy a chance see what he makes of it,can’t be fairer than that.
Welcome to Celtic Brendan