Celtic Diary Sunday September 29

Georgios Samaras was the star of the show with three goals yesterday as Celtic rattled five past struggling Kilmarnock. A seven minute spell midway through the first half saw Kris Commons open the scoring , followed quickly by two from the big Greek. Incidentally, thats the last ten goals from Commons which have been opening goals. One for those of you who like a flutter on that sort of thing.

The Ayrshire side gave hope to Celtics midweek European opponents by replying twice before half time, but the game was made safe when Samaras headed-yes, a header-a late  fourth, with substitute Amido Balde opening his acccount a couple of minutes later.

Balde , described alternately as “raw ” , ” a project ” and “shite ” depending on who you listen to, ignored an obvious pass to Anthony Stokes to run at the defender before shooting through his legs and past the keeper for the most surprising goal of the season so far. Minutes later, he sent a defence splitting first time pass out wide, and gave an indicator that there is a player in there somewhere after all.

He just has to say ” Aaaahhhh ” so we can have a look for him.

Perhaps the best example of the way the big Portuguese is looked at by Celtic fans was on the Huddleboard forum, where he was slated when he came on, before the fickle nature of supporters being cruelly exposed as the praise rained down after his goal. The thread is hilarious, and typifies the average supporter.

balde thread

The game itself wasn’t the greatest. Having failed to create anything from around forty consecutive corners, Celtic decided not to bother with any until very late in the game, and still seem obsessed with the zonal marking system at set pieces, which always ends in tears.

Still, its a confidence boost ahead of Tuesdays match, which is being shown live all over Britain.

Another little boost could be the absence of Lionel Messi from the game. He left the field during last nights seventh straight win of the season over Almeira. Wouldn’t get too excited though. He was replaced by Xavi, who is scarcely a project.

Neil Lennon, however, was delighted with the performance, in particular, that of Samaras;

“I thought he was ­world-class.

“You can talk about the standard of SPFL  football or this and that but when you see a player play as well as that, no matter the standard, you can tell that he is a top-class player.

“I thought he was brilliant. Everything about his game was of the highest quality.”

He does go over the top sometimes.. an accusation that certainly can’t be levelled at Samaras;

“I feel good in myself but hat-tricks don’t please me.

“They are only goals. The important thing is to win the league at the end of the season.

“It is a good moment to find consistency. My third goal pleased me the most because it was with a header from a set-piece. I need to score more with my head.

“I also can’t remember the last time we scored from a set-piece and that used to be our strength.

“My first one was a good finish and my second goal was 100 per cent team-work.” he said, in a tone which gives him a more than reasonable chance of presenting the next series of Sportscene.

There was another over reaction yesterday, from beleagured Killie chief Michael Johnston, who is still fighting a rearguard action after making an arse of ticket sales for the match. Kilmarnock fans protested outside the ground, and several didn’t even bother with the game, prompting a predictable reaction from Johnston;

“There are people who have their own agendas who wait in the wings and jump on any perceived error and then create as much hysteria as possible.

“Their leaders advocate withholding revenue from the club, forcing an insolvency event to try to achieve their objective.

“The main lesson is to get your offer out to the home supporters before the away supporters – but we had a very small window of opportunity to catch the Celtic support at their League Cup tie. It was unfortunate timing that the offer to the Celtic supporters went out before we had announced [the incentives to Kilmarnock fans] the following morning.” 

Why doesn’t he just say “Sorry, I made an arse of it. ” ?

Then everyone is happy.

Someone who won’t be happy this morning is former Celt Davie Moyes, the record breaking manager at Manchester Utd. His team were beaten again yesterday, this time at home to West Bromwich Albion, which sees his team in the bottom half of the EPL. Still, this is what they hired him for. His experience in battling relegation will come in useful. Moyes has signed a six year contract at Old Trafford, which even now has club lawyers desperately poring over it for get -out clauses, while Paul Lambert is looking at houses in Atrincham.

Elsewhere, David Camerons government, concerned at the nations debt, have decided to use the British Army to round up those who been avoiding paying their taxes, and denying the country much needed revenue.

On a serious note, it seems that the Ibrox support, falling in numbers as the adventure continues, are becoming more aware that their club is in dire straits. Thats the new club, the old one is already dead.

protest leaflets

But there is some good news for them, a councillor who won £2million on the National Lottery has promised to splash some of his cash on Rangers shares.
Iain McMillan celebrated his huge win by going to Ibrox yesterday with his son to watch the side thrash Stenhousemuir 8-0.

And the 48-year-old former leader of ­Renfrewshire Council’s Labour group revealed the first thing he wants to do is invest in the club.

He told the Sunday Mail: “I’ll buy some new Rangers shares. I’m not looking to get a place on the board or anything like that.

“But I’d like to invest in the club and get a plaque with my name on it.

“I had a couple of shares in the oldco Rangers so I’ll defintely be buying some new ones.”

Someone with this sort of financial acumen is wasted on Renfrewshire Council. Anyone else keep thinking of this guy when they read that ?

The BBC, those upholders of all that is right and just in this country, have banned writer, comedian and broadcaster Tam Cowan, after he penned a piece in the Record which made light of womens football. The tongue in cheek effort wasn’t particularly offensive, wasn’t particularly funny and was clearly designed as a parody of a sexist rant. ( The headline was “”From the Dark Ages ” ). Cowan missed his Off The Ball show on Radio Scotland yesterday, and looks set to miss a few more.

The line between offensive and cutting edge comedy is very fine, and Cowan has crossed it before-he once called a priest ” the biggest fucking paedophile in town” during  an after dinner speech at a masonic lodge in Kilwinning, which takes playing to your audience to an entirely new level.

However, the BBC could be accused of going over the top here, especially as Cowan wasn’t banned for that disgraceful episode.

Reminds me of the new record by Suggs, which is about looking after homosexuals, vegetarians and the disabled. The new song doesn’t contain any swear words, and there have been accusations of Madness  going politically correct.

Paul McCartney, Mick Jagger and a wee dog being told to “stay 2 made up the maestro himself, Paul McStay, who is often forgotten by Celtic fans. McStay carried the club for years when it would have served him better to move to Italy to fulfill his potential. Now, after being kicked up and down every ground in Scotland, the man cannot even take part in charity games, so damaged are his ankles, even now, more than a decade on.

Today, another great club servant…