<\/p>\n
EXT. STREET – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n Legs run along the pavement. They are Chuck Green’s.<\/p>\n Just ahead of him is Sally. They are both rambling on.<\/p>\n As they travel, various objects (Contracts, Tupes, Mortgages, Club ties, History Books, etc.) either fall or are\u00a0discarded from inside their jackets.\u00a0They are pursued by two hard-looking SFL Officials in identical waistcoats. The men are wide, but CHUCK and Sally\u00a0maintain their lead.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> Suddenly, as Chuck crosses an Investor, a share issue skids to a halt, inches from success.<\/p>\n In a moment of detachment he stops and looks at the shocked investor, then at Sally, who has continued rambling, then at the Two Officials, who are now closing in on him.<\/p>\n He smiles.<\/p>\n INT. SALLY’S FLAT ROOM – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n In a bare, dingy room, Chuck lies on the floor, alone,\u00a0<\/span>motionless and clearly out his face on Werthers Originals.<\/span><\/p>\n CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> EXT. FOOTBALL PITCH – NIGHT<\/strong><\/p>\n On a barely torch lit SFL pitch, Chuck and his friends are taking on another team at football.<\/p>\n The opposition all wear a sense of dignity (Elgin), whereas Chuck and his friends wear an odd assortment of Three fans associations — Dafty, Lardy, and Wannabee — stand \u00a0by the side, fighting.<\/p>\n The boys are outclassed by the team with the dignity but play much dirtier.<\/p>\n As each performs a characteristic ugly bit of play, the play freezes and their name is visible.<\/p>\n In Elbows’s case, his name appears as a tattoo on his bent arm.<\/p>\n Dick Boy commits a sneaky foul and indignantly denies it.<\/p>\n Elbows commits an obvious foul and make no effort to deny it.<\/p>\n Sally, in dugout, lets a pie fall between his legs.<\/p>\n Durranty tries to kick the green grass as hard as he can. He misses.<\/p>\n Chuck’s litany continues over the action:<\/p>\n CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> Chuck is hit straight in the face by a subpoena.<\/p>\n He lies back on a bed of copper coins.<\/p>\n Voice-over continues.<\/p>\n But why would I want to do a thing like that?<\/p>\n INT. SALLY’S FLAT – DAY<\/strong><\/p>\n Chuck lies on the floor.<\/p>\n Sally, Durranty and Kenny, Dick Boy and Elbows are marching up and doon or preparing to march up.<\/p>\n Dick Boy is talking to Elbows as he draws a 5 star tattoo on his arm with an inky<\/p>\n CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> DICK BOY<\/strong> CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> Take the best cashcow you ever had, multiply it by 17 million and Got no money: You can’t get enough pished Huns spending cash. DICK BOY<\/strong> CHUCK (V.O.)<\/strong> \u00a0FADE OUT. <\/em><\/p>\n PLEASE JUST FADE OUT<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" BLAMESPOTTING An Etims Screenplay EXT. STREET – DAY Legs run along the pavement. They are Chuck Green’s. Just ahead of him is Sally. They…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1573,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/etims.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/chuck-blamespotting.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2J7If-pl","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1571"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1594,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571\/revisions\/1594"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1573"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/etims.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nChoose life. Choose a Prospectus. Choose a Share-Option.
\nChoose a Rangers family, Choose a fucking big Dividend,
\nChoose stadium rename deals, John Broon Dustpile threats,
\nIan Black Fitness DVDs, and Wattys silence.<\/p>\n
\nChoose Casinos, decrepit Ibrox Refurbishment promises.
\nChoose fixed-interest buyout repayments.
\nChoose a new luxury Hotel IN Govan.
\nChoose Jabba<\/p>\n
\nhistory claims around their badges.<\/p>\n
\nChoose world records and free Army & Navy tickets.
\nChoose a variety of invester sharedeals on hire purchase
\nin a range of fucking markups.
\nChoose Rangers TV and wondering where the fuck you are
\non a Sunday morning near Annan.
\nChoose sitting on that coach heading to mind-numbing
\nspirit-crushing games in Stirling, watching Sally stuffing
\nfucking junk food into his mouth.
\nChoose rotting away at the end of the football world, pishing
\nyour last in a miserable Ibrox home, nothing more than
\nan embarrassment alongside the selfish, fucked-up brats you
\nso easily duped to enplace yourself.
\nChoose your empty future.
\nChoose Rangers.
\nFuck life.<\/p>\n
\nI chose not to choose life: I chose
\nsomething else. And the reasons?
\nThere are no reasons. Who need
\nreasons when you’ve got Rangers?<\/p>\n
\nSpongebobs’s better than Rastamouse.
\nBoth of them are a lot better than
\nKoala Brothers, a judgement
\nreflected in its relative poor
\nshowing on the team bus, in which
\nfield, of course, Mike the Knight was
\na notable success.<\/p>\n
\nPeople think Rangers is all about misery and desperation and death
\nand all that shite, which is not to be ignored, but what they forget –
\nElbows isnae just battering folk up for the pleasure of it.
\nOtherwise we wouldn’t do it. After all, we’re not fucking stupid,
\nwe’re getting well paid tae. At least, we’re not that fucking stupid.<\/p>\n
\nyou’re still nowhere near it.
\nWhen you’re on a money March you have only one worry: bating.
\nWhen you’re off it you are suddenly obliged to worry about all
\nsorts of other shite.<\/p>\n
\nGot money: You cant get enough daft Huns drinking too much in Ibrox.
\nCan’t get a bird: No chance of a ride from a Hun? Thank fuck!
\nGot a bird: too much hassle, Im trying to fleece Huns here.
\nYou have to worry about investor demands, about hospitality food,
\nNo about some football team that never fucking wins friends,
\nits no about real human relationships and all the things that
\nreally don’t matter when you’ve got a sincere and truthful Hun habit.<\/p>\n
\nI would say, in his day, Neil Morrissey was a titular puppet actor,
\nin every sense, with all the presence of someone like a Terry Scott
\nor David Jason, but combined with a sly wit to make him a formidable
\nromantic lead, closer in that respect to Glen Michael.<\/p>\n
\nThe only drawback, or at least the principal drawback, is that you
\nhave to endure all manner of cunts telling you that we are the people!<\/p>\n