“the rangers” by The Holy Poet
The Holy Poet, Etims friend and Mike the Minstrels mentor, sends up this peach as he reflects on Saturdays match/mismatch…
Big Thanks to The Banned List on Twitter for the picture of young Joseph Anthony Barton as a non Celtic supporting child above,
“the rangers”. 10th September 2016.
When your legs don’t work like they used to
And don’t keep in sync with your brain,
You’ll end up playing for “the rangers”
And find that it’s not worth the pain.
You find yourself flying into tackles
Then find every tackle’s too late
And when you’re eventually ready to leave there
You find that they’ve locked all the gates!
But there’s always the times you remember
When “you were the best in the land” !!!!
And to make sure the world was listening
You posed with an Orange flute band.
And your fans belted out all their bigotry
How they near drowned in some Fenian blood
And the dressing room chanted that hatred
With some barrister known as M’Lud.
But you were gutted it wasn’t reported
No more is there succulent lamb
Your canteen’s pre-match special luncheon
Is a plateful of fritters and spam!
And as you sip on your own branded whisky
With a big Yoonion Jack by your name
Just remember what you do for Scotland
You do nothing but put us to shame.
And the toilets you wrecked up at Celtic
Did you visit with the intention of war?
Or did you stop and gaze in amazement
And think – what the fuck are these for?
There are plenty who follow “the rangers”
Who are decent, upright and proud
But the ones who watched their team get battered
Are just scum in an unruly crowd!
So if you’re wondering why nobody likes you
Take a good look at some of your fans
They’re Scottish and sick of your Yoonion
And the hatred you show to their land!
The Holy Poet.