Celtic Diary Friday May 1: Guest Writer, Grumpy McMoan.

To appease anyone who is wondering why the passing of Keith Harris, the ventriloquist, has not been mentioned in the diary before now, I have to say a few words.

Well, it’s not like Orville will. His agent says he’s feeling “empty inside “.

The cancer got Harris last week, unusual for an entertainer these days, as its usually operation Yew Tree that gets them.

Happy now ?

Celtic can ease that horribly niggly ( can I say niggly ?) feeling that the players are making the fourth consecutive title a little more difficult to secure than it should be by beating Dundee tonight in Glasgow.

That would mean that either Celtics next point, or Aberdeen dropping a point, would see the champagne flowing and the songs being sung.

Dundee are no pushovers, and have performed admirably against the hoops this term.

But thats not whats worrying me.

It’s what Kris commons said;

“It wasn’t like a couple of years back when Rangers were in the league and we thought, ‘We need to get back on level points or we need to win to pull three points away’.

“It always felt very tight and every game had a massive importance, whereas I’ve never got that sort of feeling of, ‘Listen, we need to win this game no matter what because if we don’t Aberdeen are going to be hot on our tails’. 

Is it eight points the lead ?

One Aberdeen win over Celtic would have reduced that to two points. Fair enough, it never happened, but there is no room for complacency.

 It’s just that when I first walked through the door there was pressure on winning every single game we played. 

There still is. I’m on the point of spotting why it took Ronny so long to get that through to him.

If Neil Lennon wants him, he can have him.

Aberdeen’s development squad won their league yesterday, as Celtic failed to beat Falkirk. The gap is closing, and we need to be on the ball.

By the way, John Guidetti, censured yesterday by the SFA for referring to himself as a Super Swede who puts the ball in the netti, has had his wage demands of around 3m euros a year met by Sporting Lisbon.

Cheerio.

So, tonight, Ronny Deila should give them both the night off.

Along with Tonev, Mubarak, Zaluska and Boerrigter. Tell them to ring their mates and ask if they know of any jobs going.

And pick players who have the right attitude.

Gordon, Matthews, van Dijk, Denaayer, Izaguirre, Brown , Bitton, Armstrong, Johansen, Mackay Steven and Griffiths.

The bench should contain Fasan, Ambrose, Tierney, Forrest, Macgregor and Scepovic and whichever other development player has caught the eye.

Celtic to win by the odd goal, with Griffiths as first goalscorer ? Thats how i see it going, or rather hope how it goes, but Dundee were the first team to apply pressure on Celtic high up the pitch, the way we are supposed to do to other teams.

Only Celtic can’t handle it if other teams do it to us.

Bit miserable today, Ralph ? -Ed

Can’t go to the game tonight, work won’t let me -ralph

While the rantometer is cranked up, lets find something else to moan about.

Peter, Peter ?

Can I have a word ?

What the fuck is this all about ?

We finally encourage supporters to bring their kids to the game, spend a bloody fortune in getting them there, and now you won’t let a game against a team that pretends to be the team that screwed our club out of millions of pounds count on the season book ?

And you called them Rangers.

You specifically called them Rangers.

You gave them the recognition that they wanted.

how about, and here’s a novel and refreshing idea, you look after the supporters who come to the game week in and week out, with their families, priority over the supporters who only want to  come back when ” Rangers ” re appear , in whatever form ?

I’ve got a word for it.

It’s called loyalty.

We’ve shown it.

Now it’s your turn.

Hang on, better lighten the mood a bit.

See, the truth is, I’m annoyed with my goldfish. I cleaned his tank out this morning, and he obviously didn’t want the hassle. First of all he threw a tantrum on the draining board, and now he’s just lying on top of the water sulking.

Took me ages to do as well.

Ach , lets try to smile. It is the weekend.

Fair enough, pay tribute to the greatest Celt ever, but check the spelling first.

Manchester City under 13s ?  I think one of them may have bought his ID at a bar in Wythenshawe.

Neil McCann has walked away from his job as a coach at Dunfermline. The club issued a statement;

“We lost out on a budgeted third Scottish Cup tie, which as it turned out would have increased our income by £100,000. As a result of our disappointing league finish, we will lose out on £50,000 of budgeted income from the football authorities. Furthermore, £50,000 has been spent on legal fees trying to extricate our club from the lease at Pitreavie.

“However, the success of the Centenary Club Lifeline, the continuing support of the fans at the gate and better than expected commercial and hospitality income mean that we anticipate a trading loss (before depreciation) this season in the region of £250,000; more or less in line with our budget.

“It is now clear that the significant investment which was made in the playing squad this season to try to ensure promotion has not paid off. Clearly, our club simply cannot afford to invest in the playing squad at the same level next season.”  

All they had to do was listen to him talk about football on Sky TV, and they’d have spotted he was, er, ill equipped.

Can you imagine a motivational team talk from this lot ?

I hear Ed Miliband is visiting Glasgow tonight. Is the reception committee ready ?

Politics now, remember this ?

did they not notice what happened after the abdication, that was a crisis.

Anyway, enjoy yourselves at the game.

Yesterdays picture was taken at half time  at a game played at celtic Park in the seventies, and it was some sort of charity event that took place.

This stand here, and feel free to reminisce, was called the Jungle by supporters.

But what was the name of it that appeared on your ticket ? ( If you had one ? )