Good Friday ? Its actually taking shape as a very good friday. Virgil van Dijk, for instance, has given us a reason to be cheerful;

The big defender, who has had his services advertised in the Scottish press pretty much since he pulled on a Celtic jersey, has claimed he has no knowledge of any interest from clubs down south. Thats one good thing. The second is that he obviously never reads the papers, showing a degree of intelligence that sets him above the usual level shown by footballers.

I wonder if he gets to sit next to Leigh Griffiths on the team bus. Those long trips would just fly by.

van Dijk told the Sporting Life;

“First of all I have a contract until 2017 I think, so I don’t have to move, and I think the Champions League is always a big thing for every player. I want to play Champions League.

“We disappointed this season in the cup and the Champions League and we want to do much better next year. That’s what I want as well.”

With the World Cup coming up, the big man stills holds out hope-albeit slim-of making the dutch squad for Brazil, but he has a remarkably sensible attitude to it;

“It was a disappointment a couple of weeks ago but I’m over it and I hope they do well in the World Cup, if I’m not there or if I am there.

“The Scottish Premiership is not so highly rated by European people but it is a good competition. So you have to play in the Champions League to get some more recognition.

“If you play well in the Champions League then more people can see you. You can have a bigger chance to play in the Dutch squad.

“I don’t know how they rate players or how they choose the squad or what the procedure is.

“But I think if you’re good enough you need to be in the squad. I think I’m not good enough for the squad right now – otherwise I would be in it.”

van Dijk has had an excellent season, stabilising the defence and indeed proving he is much more than a central defender. The momentary lapse against Aberdeen, when he was sent off for an early moment of unneccessary enthusiasm, shows he still has a bit to learn, but lets be honest, he’s not far away from being a genuine class act. On and off the park.

( The author reserves the right to change his mind and call him anything he wants if van Dijk does head south. Like he usually does. )

However, the player sounds happy with his lot, and thats the important thing.

Kris Commons, who was promised a new contract some months ago, has dropped a gentle hint that he will sign it, when the club actually gets round to offering it.

Eching Chris Sutton, who received offers to head back down south after his career kickstarted alongside Henrik Larsson back inthe O’ Neill days, the hot favourite for player of the year ( alongside the token———Kris Boyd, insert your own word in the space provided )  said;

“I’m not a kid any more.

“The grass isn’t always greener elsewhere and I’ve already played down south.

“Most players might think they’d like a crack at the English Premier League but when you play in the Champions League and try to be competitive with Europe’s elite then that’s the biggest thing for me.

“That’s why I’m going to get myself as fit and sharp and good as I can be for our qualifying ties in July.

“I feel as though I have unfinished business in the Champions League.

“We did really well last season but didn’t do ourselves justice this time out, so I want to get back into the group stage and do better.

“It doesn’t bother me that Scottish football doesn’t have a great reputation in England.

“Most people down there who say that would be jealous of what we have at Celtic.

“Just about any of our home games has a better atmosphere than everything down south, big derbies apart.

“I’ve never felt as good or scored as many goals. I’m enjoying my football so hopefully something will be sorted out sooner or later. But I’m in no rush.

“Any player going into his last year will hear things out there.

“You’ll watch which games Neil Lennon is going to and who he’s supposed to be looking at, although I don’t think that’s concrete evidence.

“As soon as players start taking their minds off what they’re paid to do and start believing other clubs are looking at them, that’s when their performances start slipping.

“It’s hard to say I’ve got a luxurious lifestyle. I train every day and I’ve got three kids.

“But I don’t want to leave Glasgow. I love the people and I’m very happy here. My kids are in a good nursery and, as long as they’re happy, I’m happy.”

Commons also insists speculation over his manager’s future won’t affect his position as he added: “I haven’t looked at Neil’s contract situation.

“I’m just working on a day-to-day basis and have a great deal of respect for the way Neil goes about things.

“Ever since I’ve been here, I’ve loved every single day of working with him. I’ve previously been with managers who didn’t like me and who I didn’t like.

“Neil has his own agenda. He’s a young manager getting through the game. I don’t think it’s in my job description to ask him if he’s staying before I decide to sign.

“I would probably get a slap in the face if I did ask him!”

See. Its a very good friday.

Then theres a couple who might be joining us. Richard Stearman, pictured below, of Wolves is out of contract, which immediately puts him on our radar.

Movie star looks ?

He seems keen, and has already taken his Wolves shirt off ready for a replacement

But is he any good ? To be honest, I have no idea, because when researching him i got distracted by pictures of his partner, the lovely Beth Lay;

So you can look him up yourself. And then when your wife catches you looking at her modelling photos, you can say you are checking on her mans stats. All the way to A and E probably.

Another who has been mentioned by our illustrious press is a chap called Aatif Chachehouhe

Here he confronts a particularly vicious earthworm which has popped its head above the soil.

Hang on, look at his file. Pay particular attention to the goalscoring at his last two clubs…

Boy, do those leagues need a strong Rangers. Thats a hell of a return for a midfielder.

If I was Kris Commons I’d take Neil Lennon out for a pint tonight, and bring a pen with me.

Commons, of course , has nothing to worry about, but thats a player that should be, on those figures, snapped up before anyone else notices him. Oh. too late. Marseille and Besiktas are interested…

I’ve sent them the picture of when he saw that worm.

Elsewhere, the competition everyones talking about, “Hotline “, from where the next James Traynor will be plucked continues to delight.

Today , contestants were asked for their views on Hearts recent emergence from administration, and another prime candidate rose to the occasion..

Barra Stevens, Edinburgh , said: “Hearts have been given an easy time and treated lightly in comparison to what happened to Rangers.”

The competition is being featured in the Daily Record, who have recently lost a few of their scribblers to the opposition, showing that just as in the world of football management, it doesn’t matter how bad you are at your job, theres always someone stupid enough to offer you another one somewhere else.

However, the emergence of Keith Jackson, once responsible for more fiction than Stephen King, on twitter seems to have had an effect on his reporting…

Rangers fans demand to know if Ibrox chief

Graham Wallace is in line for a whopping

£300,000 bonus

Although not actually ringing the club and asking the question being asked by the Second Rangers support, at least Jackson gets the story out there. Its a start, I suppose, but if the new club are to suddenly have to answer questions honestly and clearly, then there will be a few squeaky bums not only in Govan but across the city at Hampden.

Elsewhere in the paper, the hilarious Billy Moshni-he really is adapting to life in the city-has his say..

But before we indulge in this little comedic gem, its worth commenting on the counter balance employed by publishing Jacksons demands on the board, with this ludicrous shite. ( Part of the joy of putting together the diary is trying to find exactly the right words to express exactly what I want it to say, which is why occasionally there slips in a swearie word or two. )

Ladies and Gentleman, from Good Froday to Ridiculous Friday. I give you Billy Moshni

Who couldn’t chuck the ball far enough to be a legend on the banks of the Trent ?