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Celtic Diary Tuesday June 11

Amido Balde looks fairly certain to be a Celtic player either today or tomorrow. All , it seems, the club have to do is get all of his agents in the same room, thrash out who gets what, and the 22 year old striker will be meeting his team mates next Thursday and starting his pre season training.

His uncle Catio, one of his agents is already in Glasgow. Tommy Langley, another, has said the boy is keen to wear the hoops, and Crystal Palace were “never runners ” in the race to sign him. Like all good agents, though, he did add that other clubs were interested.

“He is going to speak to Celtic and see where we go. He is very keen. You can see  he has a scarf round his neck and he is a happy boy”, added Langley, as his both his bargaining powers and commission began to drop drastically.

balde

Doesnt look like he wants time to think about the move.

As one door opens, another closed, with Johnny Russell moving to Derby, which is disappointing, but if Lennon doesn’t want him, then we have to respect his decision. Its what he gets paid for, and anyway, Balde could turn out to be a great addition to the squad. Which as a forward, Hooper apart, would be a refreshing change.

Shay Given, looking for a nice wee bungalow and a part time job as he eases into retirement , has his eye on a move home. Well, a move to Glasgow, where he started out as a young keeper, along with Brad Freidel, before being axed in favour of Gordon Marshall and Stewart Kerr.

keepers

Joe Corrigan, the then goalkeeper coach, now lives in Macclesfield, and doesn’t like to talk about it. Neither does Lou Macari, who simply hides behind his Racing Post when you mention it.

Whilst Celtic should put firmly behind them the days of expensive loans for “fans ” who want to play for the club, its not really Givens fault he wasn’t given a chance. After all, shifting Gordon “the cat ” Marshall and Stewart ” Billy the Fish ” Kerr was never going to be easy. Though it should have been.

Given a few years ago was an exceptional keeper, but his time has gone.

Carlton Cole is also rumoured to be wanted by Celtic, but frankly I have no idea what for.

One name that did catch the eye is Luke Simpson. The eighteen year old keeper hasn’t made a first team appearance for Oldham yet, but is apparently the subject of interest from Celtic and Manchester Utd. Now, its not difficult to see why a promising young English keeper would join Celtic. After all, the last one went from third choice at Newcastle to third choice for England in just a couple of years, and , crucially, has a girlfriend on the Alan Sugar show.

Norwich still want Gary Hooper, Arsenal have more or less signed Victor Wanyama , and  Anthony Stokes hasn’t matured at all, having got himself involved in a fracas in a Dublin nightclub, so he is out on his arse as well.

Well, actually, Norwich is just another name on the list of places that Hooper could be looking for a new house, Arsenal are at any stage between being “alerted ” by Wanyma saying a move may happen and showing him round the ground introducing him to the staff, depending on which report you believe, while Stokes was, er, chucked out of a nightclub after being involved in a fracas, as the Diary kept up its one hundred per cent record on getting absolutely nothing right, a feat which has alerted recruitment staff at the Sun, the Record , and lately, the Herald.

The story is that Stokes was in a club with his pals.  Then, an Elvis impersonator got  a proper kicking. As far as I can see, Elvis impersonators are fully aware of the risk they run when they take the job on, but, it looks like this particular hip thruster , after spending the night in hospital, having his nose re-set and his personality re assessed , discovered that the man who “came out of nowhere” was in fact a high profile footballer, and he went promptly to the police.

“We’re not letting the grass grow under our feet on this one “, said a police spokesman. Which isn’t a dreadful pun on an Elvis tune, but does sound like a fifties or sixties hit by Willie Wombat and the Washboard Five, or some other band that we try to forget.

Stokes, who just yesterday was predicted to mature and finally realise his potential in the Diary, is in the Caribbean on holiday, hopefully somewhere without an extradition treaty and a big Elvis fan club.

Reconstruction is on the agenda at Hampden today.

Chief Executive Stewart Regan said

” This is an opportunity for Scottish football to get its own house in order. What we don’t want is FIFA or UEFA bringing in mandatory rules. ”

Woah-he’s woken up! Thankfully, the whole mess at Ibrox is about to be thoroughly investigated and brought into the open. Finally , the game is about to be played on a level playing field.

Oh, here, no wait. He’s talking about unacceptable conduct amongst fans.

Not unacceptable conduct amongst clubs.

Not unacceptable conduct amongst officials.

Not unacceptable conduct by Campbell Ogilvie.

No, lets take it out on the people who pay his wages. All £280,000 of them every year.

He even has the cheek to say that -and this is word for word

“Our recent experience tends to show they tend not to be punished. ”

He is talking about fans here, not clubs, not officials and not himself. He who has overseen the biggest scandal to hit sport in Europe. With his head firmly entrenched between the cheeks of his own bottom.

Other things up for discussion include the removal of the term “associate members “, which doesn’t surprise anyone.

Anyway, we at Etims were sent this email the other day ;

To;

President Nixon

We got proof that you have been bugging people. We enclose a copy of how we intend to run the story. Please send your comments and alterations. Cheers.

From;

Woodward and Bernstein.

It received this reply.

nixon 2

Which was then acknowledged with

“Cheers buddy- we’ll give it a miss then. ”

 

Of course, that didn’t happen. Woodward and Bernstein published the truth. Thats because they are journalists, with a duty to inform, educate and expose wrongdoings. Thats why names like Tom English, Graeme Spiers and Keith Jackson should not even be mentioned in the same article.

Charlotte and the Fakeovers continue to publish snippets. The press continue to ignore them. Or dismiss them.

Aye, keep looking away. But you see when you look away, thats when the train hits you.

 

Harry Hood was the guy in yesterdays picture, one of the most underrated players to ever don the hoops.

Don’t know if under rated is the right word for this guy though. Who is he?

bonnes

 

 

 

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Alan McGrane
10 years ago

Stephane Bonnes

Krislowe
10 years ago

The Legend -Stephene Bonnes?

I didn’t believe he existed!, thought he was made up like Nessie and Bigfoot or Daryl Murphy

Hugo_Z
10 years ago

That is the enormous talent that was Stephane Bonnes, I believe.

sailorbhoy
10 years ago

Stephane Bonnes…wee bertie fae paisley still his home shirt with his name on the back!

scholzybhoy
10 years ago

he was ajags legend ye know….i think…….the again !

danboo
10 years ago

On this Balde fella.

Say we buy him, who owns his contract then? do we only onw a percentage of him? so, if we sell him on in a few years – lets say, for the sake of discussion, £5m, do his agents still take a big chunk?

10 years ago

Bonnes…putting the Good in GOOD GOD!

Marytn
10 years ago

Stephane bonne, no jokes needed, the signing was one

Pensionerbhoy
10 years ago

Ralph

The good is oft interred with Bonnes. Never a truer word!

I see Ronald the cowboy has lost his title as the best ever. A descendent has finally gone way beyond his fantasy Wild West stories and screw loose presidency and raised his head above the stone dyke around Hampden to pleasure us with some words of wisdom, sorry warning. I guess the cavalry will be putting a wide-screen kettle on even more often next season then. Of course, this determination to sort out Scottish football will only apply to supporters that mean anything to the game, so I suppose The Rangers will justifiably be left out of it again. After all they are affiliated and all affilliations should stick together like “brothers”. I’ll shake on that. The guy is less than an apology for any job far less one that requires something between your legs that does nothing but DRIP! “There may be changes ahead” if we sing and dance to his tune. But “reform” and a bit of muck shifting? No chance. The bing of Scottish football remains stinking of gas and ready to implode. Best to keep far away for it or it might make you continuously sick – no, not might.

I have oft recorded my feelings about the Celtic retirement fund and my great admiration for Shay Given does nothing to change my mind. Sorry Shay but get on ye’r bike to some big third division club down in your chosen land. If you are such a great supporter then buy a season ticket and go watch some good football from a decent seat. You get a lousy view from the dugout.

I fear wee Stockesy might be in the free to go doghouse after his latest gig with Elvis. If the guy was dying on stage, he could just have taken him to the gents and made him a legend. Someone ought to tell the lad he is being asked to maTure not maNure which is maybe why he is for ever in the sh**. Could it now be that Balde is more important than we first thought. Or is he Cole in disguise? Since no one has seen either in the flesh, it could well be a PL ruse. My experience of the Carlton is it had potential to go far but never quite made it and now has well had its day.

Well, time to get back to the kitchen fakeovers or is it makeovers the wife mentioned. The kitchen is in the last stages of recovery and a wee lick of paint here and there should see it back to full fitness. The problem is the electricity and the water are going to be off for the afternoon and most of tomorrow. Just think, pensionerbhoy forced into a short comment. See, Christmas doesn’t just come once a year and PL is not the only one who can hand out presents to you fans – and promises from Regan into the bargain. Wow!

H H

Pensionerbhoy
10 years ago
Reply to  Pensionerbhoy

Ralph, I meant to say that I seem to have returned with the luck of the Irish. Not one post lost so far though one did go walkies when I tried one comment while in Ireland.

H H

elcormaco@gmail.com
10 years ago

Yeah Stephanne Bonnes. Maybe this will be his breakout season?!
Off topic but I looked at some comments on the scottish sun pages, its ok, ive showered since, and Sevco fans are on giving it the “rangers never died” spiel. I would have no problem agreeing with them if…
They had paid the debts of the old club
They hadnt been liquidated
Their share in the spl hadnt been reassigned to dundee
They paid their debts

As they are shameless in having no intention of doing that then they can have no claim on the “history”, whyever you would want it, and when £49m of debts evaporated so did “rangers”. You would think it was simple.

Pensionerbhoy
10 years ago

elcormaco@gmail.com

I feel exactly the same but I must concede if the shoe was on my foot, I would be claiming exactly the same. It is a fact of life that no matter what happened or why, while there is a support, a club will never really die. Hate it, yes but I will have to live with it unless the ‘club’ is extinguished altogether (like Third Lanark e.g.)in some way. Charlotte just might have the syringe in her hand right now.

H H

10 years ago

SEVCO ,enjoying every minute of their dilemna,as firt the jambos ,enjoy the hells of administration,liquidation ,annihilation,then crawl back into the 4th tier of shittish fitba’ as did yir big brothers fae GOVAN,WITH THE HELP OF YOUR PROTESTANT,ORANGE, MASONIC BROTHERS, G. I. R. F. U. Ys, YA, M. H. Bs.

10 years ago

jist banta’ o coorse HAIL, HAIL, & G. B. W. N. L.

Raymobhoy
10 years ago

Elvis has left the building – On a stretcher.

willie tim 67
10 years ago

The difference is msm would be constantly reminding us that we had expired,the daily ranger drove a hearse up to celtic pk when we looked like folding

Gareth Savage
10 years ago

We don’t have De Polis in Ireland we have the Gardai or “de Gards” as we like to call them! Seeing as we like to have a wee chat here. What about an eTims forum? I know there are others but I like eTims!

acoustamatix
10 years ago

There was an etims forum “maley’s” but it got unceremoniously ditched over Christmas after nearly a decade of folk talking tic & other guff. Best forum on the web. Whatever happened to Davitt, Badlydrawnbhoy, Jedipimpz, Weebrian, Jmccormick (went to CQN), Pierre1967 and the indefensible Danboo? Guess we’ll never know…

10 years ago
Reply to  acoustamatix

Forum is worth thinking about.

Gareth Savage
10 years ago

or talking about!!!! ha ha ha ha ha ha ehh!

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