Celtic Diary Monday March 11

Somebody should hand Fraser Forster the telephone number to Cardiff City, and let him have a word with David Marshall, the current incumbent in the keepers position for the Welsh side. David, I’m sure , will explain to him that a good show against Barcelona will not guarantee you success in your career.

Since his return from injury, the big keeper seems to have forgotten how to play, and it could be that his mind is elsewhere, and his body wrapped in cotton wool until it joins it.

Another shocking display from the Celts at the weekend, despite a bright and enthusiastic start. Charlie Mulgrew scored direct from a corner and Gary Hooper further exposed Ross County keepers main weakness-i.e. shots anywhere near him-and the hoops were cruising at 2-0 before the bovrils were finished.

But, as happens all too often these days, the players forgot about everything else bar their plans for the evening, and County, all credit it to them, forced their way back into the game, before an injury time winner made Forster and Celtic look , well, stupid.

The winning goal had been coming as well, with County not giving up before the final whistle, whereas Celtic seemed content to just amble along waiting to see what would happen.

It seems that any time the team sheet begins “Forster, Ambrose…” then we are in trouble. Ambrose isn’t a right back, and Forster has forgotten how to be a goalie.

All of which leaves Lennon with a bit of a dilemma. Forster has been leaking like a parliamentary enquiry of late, and clearly doesn’t want to be here any more. Zaluska has been patient and loyal, and could certainly do a job for the rest of the season. but if Forster spends the rest of the season on the bench, theres a chance we could lose a few bob off the purchase price. The answer? Has to be Zaluska. Show them who’s boss. Lennon may well have had a point with his post match rant;

“These players owe me. I have pulled them out of places that no-one had heard of and put them in the shop window, and I want my payback now. That is simply not good enough. If they want to go they only have to knock on my door and say “I want to go” then I will leave them out and play someone else, someone who wants to be here.”

The performances are worrying him;

“It has become a problem because we have lost the last two away games to really poor performances in some aspects of the game. I’m not happy with the attitude of some of the players. some of them look like their minds are elsewhere, at other clubs.

I don’t know if they have been tapped up. I don’t know where they are mentally, but you can tell by their body language that they are not with us at the minute and I will have to sort that out. ”

Earlier, he had moved to dismiss  a mounting press campaign for him to move on, especially from the likes of Hugh Keevins-wrong choice of words there, no-one likes Hugh Keevins-who remain convinced, and are trying to convince everyone else, that Lennon is away. Largely because the MSM are terrified he will go on to get ten in a row, and possibly even more success in Europe. And thats without mentioning his combative style of management.

Lennon put our minds at rest on these stories;

“It makes no difference to me. I am the manager of Celtic and I am one of the priviliged few who have been lucky enough to do this job. I enjoy it. I love what I do. I can’t stop speculation about players or myself, but at this current period I am Celtic manager and I don’t see any reason for that to change in the future….. But why are we talking about me leaving Celtic all of a sudden? I am only three years into the job. I am doing my job. I haven’t done a job, i want to improve myself, the team the players and take the club forward. We have made huge strides this season . It is going to be difficult to replicate it next season, but that is the challenge that lies ahead.”

Happily for Celtic, there are no shortage of people ready to point out how bad things are. The Evening Times, for instance, makes sure that we all know just one more loss will see Celtic fail to match the lowest ever winning points total (86) set by a title winning side (also us, also when a last 16 place was acieved in the UCL), but doesn’t suggest focussing on those extra domestic points, as Europe doesn’t really matter. Well, not quite.

But the lower points total is viewed as a disaster, despite the fact that its still a winning total, and every single club in Scotland would love to swap places.

With no other Premier team in Glasgow these days, Sky TV broadcast the Edinburgh derby on Sunday, which ended 0-0 after the linesman failed to spot Leigh Griffiths free kick cross the line (by about four feet) before bouncing back out. Perdictably, calls for expensive goal line technology-as opposed to linesmen with 20/20 vision-are being made again.

However, Etims colleague Desi Mond , who clearly has way too much time on his hands, reckons it could all be solved with a bucket of sawdust. Simply covering the bit behind the line with sawdust, so the ball doesnt bounce, would solve the problem. Its a good point, and fairly simple, like the best ideas. Even angling the ground behind the goal-line to slope downwards would prevent the ball bouncing out, Desi adds, as these two suggestions ruled him out of ever being involved with the SFA at a high level. Largely because they make sense.

Griffiths was clearly upset his goal didn’t count, and it didn’t help when a supermarket chain an email asking him how it felt like to be robbed.

Apart from First Division Partick, there are a couple of other teams who still play in Glasgow, down in division Three, and they are in the top two places, fighting for the title. Rangers, currently at the top, are seventeen points in front of Queens Park, who have a game in hand. Rangers manager , Ally McCoist , had slated his team as the worst in the clubs history, possibly including their defunct predecessors in that statement, in what could be quite possibly the worst piece of man management in the history of the game. His side promptly went out and lost 2-1 to Annan Athletic at home, and the winner was scored by a chap called Ally Love, which is something that seems to be lacking right now amongst the dark hordes.

On the back of this, this morning the Herald unveiled a new plan to increase the New Clubs turnover to £100m a year, by , er, getting a high commission on shirt sales, and well, that seems to be it.

These new moonbeams have prompted long time Diary contributor Billy MacBiggott to finally take the scales from his eyes;

“How much more of this pish are we supposed to swallow?  I wish they would just shut up and concentrate on the football.” Sounds like the bears are revolting.. (I’ll get my coat.)

But surely all is well, a big lead at the top of the league. Surely McCoist hasn’t blown it-no-one could surrender a lead that big at the top of the table? Well, not again, anyway.

Wee bit of breaking news-Victor Wanyama says he loves it at Celtic, and wants to stay! We’ll see, but its encouraging news.

Pat Bonner is the non Scot with most appearances, a massive 642, but who , apart from Henrik Larsson, is the non Scot with most club goals?

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