Celtic Diary Wednesday September 23: What Are We Going To Do Now ?

Westminster cunningly avoided the word ” lockdown ” when announcing new rules about what we can and can’t do as Cornavirus infections continue to spiral throughout the land.

 

But thats what is next, with Prime Minister Johnson shifting the blame from his own incompetence to that of you and I, for ignoring the rules . Except that we didn’t, at first, he and his own did.

 

So the less enlightened among us thought that it was fine to ignore the threat, and now we are right back where we started in March.

 

Except that this time the thinly veiled threat of troops on the streets to keep order was mentioned, as was the fact that we’re going to have these restrictions on place until March next year…

 

 

A monumental fuck up indeed.

 

That simply means the best we can hope for is that we all have roughly what we have now when all this is over. Thats everything from friends and relatives to houses and jobs.

 

 

 

Football , however, will continue to wave it’s Exemption Certificate for as long as it can, but like every other industry it will have to face up to reality sooner or later.

 

 

 

Probably sooner.

 

A wee bit of poetry doing the rounds sums it up….

 

 

Image

 

 

 

 

Celtic travelled to Riga yesterday to play their Europa league qualifier against the Latvian champions. If supporters are feeling a sense of pointlessness, then one has to consider the mindset of players and management, who might just be starting to think it’s all a waste of time. If there is to be any lollygagging on the pitch out there, then perhaps it’s understandable.

 

Domestically, however, a precedent was set last season when the league was called on a points per game basis, and oif it were to be called tomorrow under the same criteria then Celtic would indeed be crowned champions.

 

Which is probably why if anything is done it will be a suspension, with maybe the league reduced to half the length to be continued whenever it is deemed safe again, which might yet be around Christmas time, but only if people wake up and realise that we are not living in some sort of movie, and these are dangerous times.

 

Still, if it were a movie, it’s unlikely the ending, where the virus would be defeated by closing the pubs at 10 pm so everyone can grab some cans and head back to a mates house , would be approved by the script editor as realistic.

 

 

Frankly, for whatever remains of the season, domestically and internationally, Celtic must play every game as though it’s a league decider.

 

Because thats exactly what it might turn out to be.

 

 

Meanwhile, try to be as cheerful as possible, if the pubs are closing at ten, then drink earlier and drink bigger….

 

Image

 

 

If you cant meet friends or relatives , send them a text saying that you’ll be in touch when it’s safe. Do this with people you don’t like and I promise you’ll feel fantastic …..

 

there’s a bonus hidden in all the gloom as well….no family rows at Christmas…and for once no one will tell me I’ve ruined the festivities for everyone, because no one will be coming round to eat all ny food and drink all my beer…

 

Episode 90 - Scrooge on the Couch: How the Numinous Transforms – This  Jungian Life

 

 

No pointless running around crowded shopping centres, no wasting money on gifts they don’t want for people you don’t like.

 

 

See ?

 

You’re feeling better already.

 

And you’ll feel even better when one or two clubs or companies use the pandemic as an excuse for not paying their bills and folding.

 

 

No one is going to buy Alfredo Morelos, in fact the market as a whole might stall completely now…bearing in mind the window closes in less than a fortnight, and with football uncertain to continue, then there’s every chance clubs will decide to keep their money where it is, and that will affect clubs and companies who need to sell to survive.

 

 

Emergency meetings are being held in boardrooms all over Europe to discuss finances……

 

 

 

 

 

If you are concerned about the mentality of our players, spare a thought for those now trapped on the other side of the city, where they are becoming increasingly aware that they won;t be remembered as the Men Who Stopped the Ten, but in fact they will be immortalised as the Men Who Won Fuck All.

 

 

You could see signs of that in the recent draw with Hibernian….

 

 

Image

 

 

 

As for our own players leaving, things appear to have changed.

 

The word is that they are beginning to think leaving now isn’t worth the hassle. Relocating during a glbal pandemic, to a country with the worst record in delaing with it is not a good move, and even agents, who view their clients as nothing more than assets, will be advising them to hold on to what they have for a while yet.

 

If Celtic genuinely don’t need the money, they won’t force any sales.

 

And I find it difficult to believe any club will risk huge amounts of money in these uncertain times, as exemplified by Milan now wanting to take Kris Ajer on a try before you buy loan.

 

 

Keith Jackson, writing in the Record, declared this morning that….

 

Scottish football could be weeks away from a “catastrophic” collapse after Boris Johnson revealed fans could be locked out of the game for the next six months.

The grave warning came from one senior top-flight figure as part of a special Record Sport probe into the potentially ruinous ramifications of Tuesday’s raft of new coronavirus restrictions rubber-stamped simultaneously in both Westminster and Holyrood.

And we can reveal panic-stricken clubs from all over the country – and across all four divisions – now fear they could be forced to the wall unless they receive an emergency cash bailout from the Scottish government.

 

Football needs to remember that it’s not the only industry thats going to suffer, and it needs to come up with ideas, from the highly paid guys who run it, that are better than simply asking the government for a bail out when people will be losing jobs, homes and even lives over the next few months.

 

 

In the meantime, stay safe, stay home unless you really have to go out.

 

And this will be over sooner than you dared to hope.

 

 

On Monday, we had this….

 

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R.St.Parsley
 1 day ago

Caption:
“And here’s my hand, my crusty Hun
Now gies the hand o’ thine
We’ll laugh at Sevco as we laughed
At the Huns of auld lang syne”

 Today…..
Image

 

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mckenzke67
6 months ago

Caption…if it wisnae fer yer wellies, where would ye be?

TicToc
6 months ago
Reply to  mckenzke67

Sorry, pal, posted before reading comments…..but you must have a ‘great mind’. 🙂

Cesar
6 months ago

Nicola Sturgeon outlines tough new measures for first footers this Hogmanay

henkesdreadlocks
6 months ago

Caption…….

Sevco supporter comes up with a unique method to ensure the transfer stickers on his Ca tore jersey stay intact.

Gerry
6 months ago

Etims readers silence Ralph and his hysterical misery once and for all.

henkesdreadlocks
6 months ago

Caption…….

Having had no great reaction from his use of buses, Slippy takes it a stage further.

TicToc
6 months ago

Caption: If it wiznae fur your wellies, where wid ye be……….?

6 months ago

CAPTION
As throwing his losers under a bus wasn t working, Gerrard tries a steamroller.

6 months ago

Calling the league at halfway (19) is unfair…22 games maybe better, because every team will have faced each other home and away.
If Jackson is surprised that crowds may not be back this season , hes a bigger, thicker f@@@y than I thought.

Frank McGaaaarvey
6 months ago
Reply to  Tyrone9

Remember his ‘big fuss over nothing’ tweet just before lockdown? Obviously inhaling the same fumes as Denise Welch, Ian Brown and Paranoid Celt.

Paranoid celt
6 months ago

And one or two others

TicToc
6 months ago

Ralph, where might I acquire some of them ‘new’ Guinness glasses as shown in the pic in today’s Diary?

6 months ago

Caption,Res 12,s Auldheid found under big Peter,s heated driveway

Cesar
6 months ago

Jabba Corleone lurking in the shadows making sure a new Morelos bid story runs daily with an offer they can’t refuse.

tony carlin
6 months ago

Caption. 2020 in a nutshell!

Cortes
6 months ago

Caption: New from Michael Flatley: Feet of Tar-aa

I’ll get me donkey jacket

Cartvale88
6 months ago

Caption
Last diehard buried at Ibrokes.

Think the panic in the Daily Wanker is specific to the one club. If the buffalo or the Snotter are not sold by the 06/10/20 they are screwed.

Monti
6 months ago

Caption: Pizza Express in Woking

Monti
6 months ago

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where wid ye be.

6 months ago

Sevco finally get rid of Morelos – for an undisclosed fee.

Bognorbhoy
6 months ago

Caption …

James Taylor
Well, I’m a steamroller, baby
I’m bound to roll all over you
Yes, I’m a steamroller, baby
I’m bound to roll all over you
I’m gonna inject your soul with some sweet rock ‘n roll
And shoot you full of rhythm and blues
Well, I’m a cement mixer
A churning urn of burning funk
Yes, I’m a cement mixer for you, baby
A churning urn of burning funk
Well, I’m a demolition derby
A hefty hunk of steaming junk
Now, I’m a Napalm bomb, baby
Just guaranteed to blow your mind
Yeah, I’m a Napalm bomb for you, baby
Guaranteed to blow your mind
And if I can’t have your love for my own
Sweet child, won’t be nothing left behind.
It seems now lately, baby
Got a bad case steamroller blues.

Tenaka Khan
6 months ago

“Them tarrier bastards got Willie!”

Devoy45
6 months ago
Reply to  Tenaka Khan

Caption:Current Tory government comes up with austerity solution to filling potholes in the road! “The poor benefit by not having to pay for funerals” says government spokesman.

Man in Denial
6 months ago

caption

If William Strewth wasn’t out rowing, he’d be out laying some tarmac

TonyDtic
6 months ago

Caption – Sevco have last ditch attempt at flattening more-loss’s belly before selling him to the 55th bidder for a world record fee.

Mike
6 months ago

What was the cost to Celtic of Boli Bolingoli Mbombo’s Covid 19 secret escape to Spain, breaching the coronavirus protocols?
Banned for 5 games, with two games suspended.
A Covid Fixed Penalty fine from Police Scotland.
A Celtic £3000.00 SPFL. fine.
A Celtic public apology.
A Celtic apology to every SPFL. club.
Endless bad publicity.
A Celtic two game suspension.
He was fined by the club for probably two weeks wages.
Bolingoli cost Celtic it was reported £3.00 million from Austria Vienna.
And now he has been shipped out on loan for this season to Turkish club, Istanbul Basaksehir.
It has to be assumed that he will never wear the Hoops again and will be sold probably for £1.5 million, if Lawwell gets more, then good enough.
So apart from the fines, the bans, missing some important games, including those two games that were suspended in the SPFL. bringing the club into disrepute and tarnishing the clubs good name, he has cost Celtic it has to be assumed around £2.00 million pounds in monetary value. His error of judgement has had very serious consequences.
Contrast that to Aberdeen. The 8 players who broke Covid protocols by visiting a bar.
A £3000.00 SPFL. fine.
A Covid Fixed Penalty Fine.
Probably a club fine for the 8.
A two game suspension for the club.
An apology also to the SPFL.
A two game ban- suspended till end of year, per 8 players. (so none).
Two of the Aberdeen 8, tested later for the coronavirus.

Mike
6 months ago
Reply to  Mike

Stung on the Baws by feminist bees,
Not once, not twice but three,
They will not find nectar in my under breeks,
Hurry up Mrs. please,
and bring me that packet of frozen peas.

The pains so intense as he yells and shrieks,
as the bees laugh, and he falls down to his knees,
getting up slowly he takes the knee,
Cos bees lives matter,
but so does his Baws,
to hing loose, wild and pain free.

alzyerpal
6 months ago

ON THIS DAY 23/09/1920

WILLIAM WILTON, Manager of Rangers FC, dies in mysterious boating accident, on the same day he allegedly signed Rangers first Roman Catholic player, Tim O’Fenian*

RANGERS FC build the famous ‘Albion Car Park’ (photo)

*Apparently devastated by grief at the death of Mr Wilton; Mr O’Fenian tore up his contract and moved away to Tasmania or somewhere, the very same day.

6 months ago

Caption:David Murrays old boots unearthed at new tesco site in Govan.

CarlJungleBhoy
6 months ago

Caption: We can now reveal concrete evidence of an attempt to tamper with the brakes on Morelos’s Lamborghini Cementmixeroni

JimboH
6 months ago

Caption…..
Searching for that elusive vein of gold the legendary auld time miner of folklore died with his boots on.

6 months ago

Europa league should be used as game time for players.
So I would send out guys who need some game time
Bain
Frimpong Bitton Jullien Taylor
Soro Connell
Turnbull Rogic Ellynoussi
Ajeti
We should have enough to win without risking our main bhoys.

CarlJungleBhoy
6 months ago
Reply to  Jimmybee

Jullien hasn’t travelled to Riga apparently

6 months ago

Caption: she’s no singing these boots are made for walking noo.

Village Idiot
6 months ago

Caption. “hey Jimmy, are you sure that the feathers go on last.”

mattybhoy
6 months ago

now we know how person got under more or less’s car

Johnny C
6 months ago

Stevie G disappeared around the same time as Peter Lawwell’s new heated driveway was installed.

Owen Mullions
6 months ago

Tyrone, (can’t reply directly on this site)if we reach halfway point and the huns are in pole position like last year, they will call the league as quick as you can say: ‘We Arra Peepul’.

PS. Jackson isnae a fanny – a fanny has warmth and depth.

SteveNaive
6 months ago

Mike you could argue the two missed games would have hindered our preparation for the CL and helped our exit.
Does this mean we won’t have to suffer the Celtic Christmas advert ?
Every cloud…

Mike
6 months ago
Reply to  SteveNaive

Yes, you could be certain that his behaviour did’nt help the club in anyway at all and
If we have to suffer the Celtic Christmas advert, its only right that you should too.
Tough Cheddar. 😉

Funkyy
6 months ago

Re Ralph’s Diary introduction…what I’d like to know, and what I haven’t heard a single reporter/journalist ask, is this:- when the magic vaccine is finally introduced will it be COMPULSORY to be vaccinated? and if so, if anyone refuses will they be held down and forcefully vaccinated?
I’m not into conspiracy theories, but….

Paranoid celt
6 months ago
Reply to  Funkyy

The government behavioural scientists and 77th brigade have done such a good job on the population they most likely won’t need to make them mandatory.
The public have passed all the obedience tests so far. Bill Gates will get his 20 to 1 return on his investments in vaccines that he boasted about

Frank McGaaaarvey
6 months ago
Reply to  Funkyy

No, it will be the same as the current flu vaccine. The most vulnerable in society will be strongly advised to get it and it will be available to anyone else who wants it. Which means no one in the Manchester music scene will be getting it.

Puggy67
6 months ago

Caption: When Billy launched his ‘Tesco Ibrox – over my dead body’ protest, he had no idea how accurately his campaign would end.

Puggy67
6 months ago

https://www.facebook.com/marketplace/item/328760578151579/
Wooden BBQ. Profile picture. Quality.

Monti
6 months ago

Evening all,
Desimond could you follow me back on twitter please?
How rude!
Anyway, with regards to two players i felt could have been long term strong performers for Celtic, John McGinn & Scott McKenna.
It takes me back to when Billy McNeill was manager of Celtic & his auote ” Where possible i would always try & sign players who had a feeling for the club, i feel they understand the club & give that bit more “.
Wise words & no matter what anyone has to say on these two players, both are Celtic men with a connection to the club, we can’t keep letting these types slip away from our clutches.
Scott Brown is in his last season as a starter, John McGinn would have been his successor, box to box with a goal & a tackle in him.
Scott McKenna some say is immobile etc, well Shane Duffy isn’t fast, Mick McCarthy wasn’t fast, Willie Miller, Alex ebt Mcleish weren’t fast…good defenders tho.

Disappointed we have missed Mckenna & McGinn, meanwhile we will try & sign young players from the ivory coast who offer nothing!

Nick Hammond? Peter Lawwell?
Where’s the new left back?

Clueless.

Monti
6 months ago
Reply to  Monti

P.S. Desi i won’t be able to interact on Twitter for 6 days as i’ve been banned for telling Douglas Ross what i was going to do to his testicles.

Paranoid celt
6 months ago

Apologies to Mr etims for posting non football crap on his football blog.
I’m honestly a genuine celtic fan and I’ve been putting off posting on blogs for years, I’m normally a lurker.
I always enjoyed the diary. I was planning a full week in Glasgow for a ten in a row party.
I’ve hardly missed watching a celtic game in 20 years. This year my hearts not in it. Ive only watched one game against Dundee utd this season in the felons club. I think its the best celtic pub in Belfast but the temp checks and all the crap put me off.
I keep telling myself to stop posting but now that I’ve started I’m finding it hard not to when I read.
Apologies again and if you want me to stop posting my hopefully wrong crap I promise I will.

Frank McGaaaarvey
6 months ago
Reply to  Paranoid celt

Fair do’s PC, I’m sure we’d all love nothing more than purely football talk as we discuss our views from the stands (them were the days!) with a sore throat from shouting at whoever’s turn it is to get it he blame in the Hoops.

portpower
6 months ago

Caption:
Highway rubbery.

Uibh fhaili
6 months ago

its 9 45pm a pint for me and one for the road

Charlinick
6 months ago

Isn’t the‘Sleeping Policeman’ meant to go on top?

Uibh fhaili
6 months ago

Don’t bother with the feathers we’ll just tar this prick for joining the brits

Bognorbhoy
6 months ago

Caption 2…
They asked if I could see the rangers coming , and I said, the rangers ? I couldn’t see a big fekin steamroller

Spudscave
6 months ago

Maw whit kina fags dis ma da smoke.Get him the low Tar wans Senga hen.

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