Scottish football remains in turmoil, and it appears their is to be a timely intervention from the royal family, who are set to bring out their big guns to force an investigation into the rather underpriced sales of assets when Rangers collapsed into oblivion a few years ago.
When Betty, as she’s known to her friends, found out the club whose supporters claimed to adore had been a wee bit shy in coming up with her money, she was less than pleased…
Tonight, at 8pm , she’ll address the nation and tell all about how the club refused to pay its way and sold the assets off cheaply to avoid paying anything at all in the biggest sporting scandal in British history.
She’s really pissed off, we hear, as it means she might have to dip into her savings to pay for a lawyer for one of her kids who has got himself into a bit of trouble, though she reckons he’s just been hanging around with the wrong crowd.
She may also mention something about all sticking together in times of crisis, a reference to a virus that is currently killing off a lot of old people who don’t have bloody great big houses in the country to hide in behind a wall of armed guards, and ask us to support the NHS and its workers, so that she doesn’t fucking have to.
Hence the expected rant to people and companies that aren’t paying their dues, as we are all in this together, except for her and those who have avoided paying their dues, which is how it always was and always will be.
There is a great deal of uncertainty surrounding the game at the moment.
“rangers ” have stayed fairly quiet on the possibility of Celtic being awarded a ninth title as it becomes increasingly apparent that there won;t be any football games played from now until perhaps as late as the autumn.
The struggling club/company need the match day revenue to survive until the next payday, and we hear they have been, for once, ahead of the curve with a solution.
They have already been trialing social distancing at games, which they will present to the SFA as a way of restarting the season with public safety in mind. They have a point, just because a stadium holds 50,000 it doesn;t mean thats how many has to be there.
They will present evidence from a few of their own games to back their case.
They will also present the argument that by appointing Steven Gerrard as manager they have been working towards smaller and safer crowds for a couple of years now, and they must be praised for such forward thinking.
Speaking of Gerrard, he’s showing that he is a decent fellow who cares abiut the environment, and wants you to highlight his latest campaign…
Top guy.
As the global health crisis continues, it looks increasingly likely that there is only one option for the authorities.
The league will be declared over, Celtic will be champions and Hearts may be relegated, depending on whether or not the league is reconstructed.
A possible late start may mean sixteen teams playing each other twice, reducing the amount of games, but in doing that, income is reduced, and clubs do not want that as it will affect sponsorship, advertsing and tv revenue.
Well, if the league had a sponsor , or come to think of it if any of the domestic tournaments had a sponsor, then they would have a point, but not only have the SPFL/SFA failed to show any leadership during the current crisis, they sort of cocked everything up when there wasn’t.
Frankly, Scottish football is facing a massive problem even when it does start again, and perhaps it would be an idea to use the enforced break to engineer change in not only how the game is run, but in who runs it.
That, instead of who is or isn’t taking a pay cut, or any of the other nonsense being debated, should be the real issue.
Nonsense such as the piss poor idea eminating from Ibrox of suing the SPFL should the league be finished and Celtic awarded the title.
They may have considerable legal experience, given their regular court appearances over the years, but whilst they have that kind of experience they haven’t actually ever won any, and an attempt to sue an organisation for following the rules of that organisation that they had signed up to would be a bit of an ask if they employed Rumpole of the Bailey.
Of course, it’s little more than a deflection to appease their fans, and another reason why Celtic should only agree to a cessation of the campaign if all clubs are forced to issue a statement saying they agree with the decision, which would also present an interesting challenge for anyone attempting legal action to overcome.
Not everything stops though, and Celtic are still looking at players to add to an already impressive list of prospects for development.
Latest on the list is Calum Kavanagh, an Irish forward at Middlesborough , though how they are going to watch him during the lockdown is beyond me.
He probably is on a list, as he seems to be a good layer, but this could be just another example of papers trying to fill space, as there is little else to talk about when the football isn’t on.
Those of you who are fortunate enough to be spending quality time with your families will not have this problem, as our partners are finding plenty to talk about, in my own case I am now fully aware of everything I’ve ever done or said that she hasn’t agreed with over the last thirty years.
Later today we’ll take a walk into memory lane with the lyirics of some old tunes that were forwarded from an old songbook by DSK on twitter.
Maybe when there’s not much to look forward to, we can raise a smile and a story from looking back….
Yesterday, we had this…
Caption: One couple discovered a novel way to defeat the hording of toilet roll during the Corona Virus crisis
I know you’ve hid that hand sanitiser somewhere.
I said “STAND UP! for the Champions..no HAND UP!”
The original version of ‘Sooty & Sweep’ failed to impress BBC bosses who demanded changes. Matthew Corbett declared “I’ll make a better fist of it next time.”
Prince Andrew says, “One has no recollection of ever having met the young lady”.
Caption,The new Harvey Weinstein Covo19 testing gets under way
“Gottle of Geer”, pfft shite ventriloquist I saw her lips move!
Caption ; ‘NOW WASH YOUR HANDS’
a bird in the hand , worth 2 in the bush ?
Caption
Orange Order shows new way of tossing the baton
So much guff is being written by the SMSM about stadia capacity being reduced, the mighty Wankers spending and strengthening their squad, the old chestnut of null and void, and the Rankers latest wheeze, legal action, THOUGHT DAVE HAD LEFT.
Amazingly the elephant in the room is being ignored, what will be left in six months. A bit like the morons at Uefa sinking in quicksand, in denial that the world is changing.
Caption: In a disastrous advertising campaign the Quality Street tin characters act out the sweet selection. Here we have the chocolate toffee finger.
Caption
Man asks wife if she fancies a Kit Kat
Oh dear
Contradiction at it’s finest
No it isn’t
Kris Kristofferson?
Who plugged it in…
Whoop,kit kat has wifi,who knew?
Una,
I heard you prefer the chunky?
Co-joined twins attempt self isolation.
G
day all.
s need. Help is heard.All are in one
Let me know if you need anything.
The court jesters are the bane of us all but where do we send them?
Keep The Faith,they`re to be.
My Coronavirus Diary.
Day one: Smiles and laughter, subjective talks about what is better, football or the Rural.
Day two: No papers or telly, e-mails arrive, friends call, work continues.
Day three: Blog read, smiles and laughter, the heider’s good as usual, the heiders are still just that, heiders.
Day four: Work continues, family distancing is heart-breaking, but the stories of super-human efforts by the NHS. as applause and kisses are blown at the telly in recognition of the many who do so much, God Bless them.
Day five: Total admiration of the NHS. and the huge numbers of volunteers, work continues, blowing kisses at the grand-weans through car windows.
Day six: Darkened scowls as the conversation starts to wane, innocent remarks are treated as insults, where is the football as I scroll through the telly looking for my Celtic fix.
Day seven: Drums fingers on the table, furious stares, the knives are sharpened.
Day eight: Innocent amorous moves are rejected as her hand moves under her pillow to search for her revolver, that’s it then, walks the dug, work continues.
Day nine: FFS. fuq, nervous laughter as 2 metre social distancing has arrived in the hoose.
Day ten: Fuq. it, grand-weans get hugged, dusty Celtic books get dusted off, the Smithsonian channel takes a beating.
Mike,
I think we’ll need to talk. Day 9?? Wait till day 21. Mind, as I often say, there is always a silver lining. Mrs PB hasn’t spoken for a week. Now, for all I nearing my time to meet my maker and have often been to Paradise, I do not profess to know what heaven is like, but………or maybe if Carlsberg did paradise………
Be safe and well everyone and say a few for all who are sacrificing their safety and risking their lives to keep us safe and to care for those who need it. Maybe for those who are not as well – personal choice.
Caption
“Hans, when you were asked to block the hole in the dyke with your finger…………….”
H H
Phew, for a moment I thought you might be bringing up Day 8. 😉
Keep well and stay safe to you both.
Caption
“The Rangers” step up the hunt for Dave King’s money
Caption:
Mr Bowditch defines true North.
Day eleven: Eyes open wide at the wine stash, tasty. Abba and the seventies music arrives, again, as you tube songs lift the spirits, on tippy toes as work continues.
Day twelve: Arguments increase, huffs and puffs increase, social distancing in the hoose increases to three metres, where the F, is the footy? when will we see the Celtic again.
Day thirteen, work continues.
Day fourteen: The human spirit is reinvigorated, chatter like work continues, all is good.
Stay safe and look after yourselves please.
Oh there you are ya walloper, you’ll be struggling the now with the housebreaking in Dundee now that folk have to stay in eh?
Never mind, when we get back to normal i’ll have a 75″ Pioneer.
No such thing as quality time. It is time spent with your family. ‘Quality’ is a middle class construct to assuage their guilt arriving home from the city to spend ten minutes with their weans and delineate it from the lower classes time spent with theirs. I’ll get my coat.
FUCK THE QUEEN!
G
day Monti,
ld leyland and diversify the latter of us in the right spot.she
They can`t throw themselves on a hand that has thrown? Watch where you step.
Their perfect perch.
G’day port,
How’s things in Wolf Creek?
Lockdown?
I might lose my kids at their work Monti.
We`re there.
G
day Monti
Good health to you and yours.
Look after your Ghirls.
Kind of dont know what to say.
Two bob for ALL.
Zz
Why arn
t all chippin
in to head Charlie hame to his Mammy?He`s one leg longer than the other.
See,who is figuring out who?
G
day Charlie,chickens in a cage.
re out.Upside down and they
Reality ring.Tag team.
Is it no,no?
Not even with yours.
Paul Daniels controls Debbie’s hand movements.
Wee bassa are nackering.
That`s wee bassas for you.
Enjoy the fact of being patient,till your Mammy tells you,off you go.
Null & void…
The illustrious author has proposed to himself his object, to unite all the theories scattered throughout the various channels of publication, employed by his predecessors, to reduce them to one common method, and present them all in the same point of view.
We are the Principia.
Jabba`s still a plick.
Thank God he wears his watch on his left hand…
The Belarus President demonstrates his unorthodox approach to the current “handwashing” protocols.
Caption
…extent across.
Caption, Sooty meets Andy Pandy.
Caption………
‘Do you remember that baton you ‘misplaced? I think I’ve found it’
“Baton”?
You mean bgbhoy? 🙂
Caption: Man with 6 foot fingers observes social distancing rules.
Caption: Scottish Chief Medical Officer demonstrates being 2 metres away with her husband.
Caption: “Do as we say, not do as we do” state Boris and Dominic during latest press conference.
What to do at 8pm tonight? Hmmm, think I’ll check out what episode of Only Fools And Horses the UK Gold channel are showing for the tenth trillion time.
Oh, and many thanks to Ralph & Co for providing a daily window of virtual insanity during these surreal times.
Snotty nosed sevconians.
That`s what the World needs…a wee shake.
sevco to cause specific FC.
Caption:
gers genie.
Third wish for thy third of the third.
Carry on SFA.
Have all Club
s a Bowls side?
Theyre to invest in space stations.
% though.
Puggy, brilliant
His name is Dale Light saving time.
O`eff
Caption: Prince Andrew offers 17 year old a lift.
The Rangers we
ll take a loan of that.
ll bring it back.We
Why not them
Caption
Captain Birdseyes new advertising campaign for Fish Fingers
Caption: Not Una
Has anyone else watched dwarf porn?
Entertaining like 🙂
Ken.
NURSE
There is a dwarf nurse in one of the films i’ve…err my friend watched.
Doubt is gone.
Scotch men velcro on extra fasteners.
Deviance is a behavioural disposition that is not in conformity with an institutionalized set-up or code of conduct.
Those around shall.
Better who?
Caption
Crack dealer comes through with the goods at that annual fancy dress
Tomorrow is the 700 th anniversary of the Declaration of Arbroath. Not a thing in any media yet a broadcast by an English Queen, who ‘purred’ at the last fixed referendum result. Of course an independent Scotland would have struggled just now but our economic strength, devoid of Tory greed, would be enough to see a nation of 5.5 million people recover.
On another note ( site) I see it is John Hartson’s birthday. On reflection, and a wee look at the accompanying video of a selection of his goals, ( my favourite being against Liverpool) he was a great signing for us. Yep, I did say I thought he wasn’t mobile enough.
If Celtic signed me i
ld cross a ball that
ld produce.If no,id tell the lazy bassa in the box to read.
Weve plenty.
Told what? 1873.
So our chief Medical Officer , Catherine Calderwood has apologised for telling us all to STAY AT HOME while she and her family spent a weekend at their holiday home in fife by a beach???
But , it turns out her and her husband made the same trip last weekend too.
So 2 weeks in a row she decides the rules don’t apply to her.
Is it all politicians , or are the SNP full of these f@ckwits…?
She can’t last out this week now……Got to go.
As soon as you think you are above the law , your time is up…
As usual these people have no morals , she will not resign , so WEE JIMMY KRANKIE will need to do a Warburton on her.
With these fools in charge , what chance have we got?
Can’t remember this outcry when Prince Charles came to Scotland with the virus, never heard the tory /labour unionist cabal shouting for him to step down as heir to the throne, funny old thing that!! Maybe Betty will say a bit more tonight, but I won’t hold my breath.
By the way she is definitely in the wrong, but if she gets charged with the reporter who has been trailing her?
It was members of the public in Fife that took the pictures.
And shes not getting charged , which means really nobody in Scotland can now be charged since they let off such a high profile person.
Nobody in my area has been charged straight away, being told to go home by the police, cars that are unoccupied at the beach car park are getting warning notices on their windscreens under the wipers.
Anyway ya bam, where in my post does it say she’s getting charged, I suggest you get a dictionary and look up the word “if”!!
Prince Charles didn’t put himself up as the pouty face of the SNP stay at home TV campaign ?
She did.
Big difference.
F@CK what the royals are up to.
Calderwood has to go.
Another JIMMY KRANKIE Failure.
The list continues to grow.
Unionist alert!!
First sign of a dickhead is when the unionist/sevco fan insult gets hurled.
That’s a head in the sand , see no evil, nothing to see here response
D ickhead move to pull out the unionist/sevco fan insult.
You must be see no evil,head in the sand nothing to see here type of guy.
BlinD faith in the SNP .
I don’t understand it.
Can you point me towards the Sevco fan insult, look forward to you pointing it out.
Its your previous comment…unionist alert.
Same insult .
that’s why I put them together
unionist/sevco.
Put your specs on
Yet again, she’s not a politician, she’s a public servant, so your attempted point scoring is a bit like Sevco’s – futile.
SFA,
Spot on!
ohh no….don’t you get involved….lol
Very good response.
She was foolish to think nobody would be tracking all her moves during this time.
But is her expertise in fighting this more important right now than requesting her dismissal? Is there someone with the same experience able to take over her role.?
If not then she has to stay on. At least until we have reached the peak.
But so bloody selfish you just cant believe her stupidity.
I don’t think anyone was tracking her moves. As the public face of a government tv campaign , visiting a holiday home twice when everyone in that area knows its your 2nd residence is more than foolish. She very obviously took the view that the rules that she set out on TV did not apply to her or her family. Just to ALL OF US. Just to all of the DOCTORS and NURSES too.
So now her ‘punishment ‘ it seems is to no longer feature in front of any future press and media .
And I am sure ‘ the RULES’ will be pointed out to the REST OF US again tonight ,probably with a warning of severe police action against ANY OF US who DISOBEY.
Also it seems expertise in Healthcare in Scotland must be very Hard to come by as she seemingly cannot be replaced.
All the other professionals in this field must be wondering what she has that they don’t ?
My wife is an A&E nurse and has just finished four night shifts in a row and she wants her to stay in her job.
Interestingly she says A&E isn’t as hectic as normal, and their ward is putting it down to the pubs being closed!!!!
NHS Scotland hasn’t met an A+E target since 2017.
The 2 month target for CANCER treatment hasn’t been met since 2013 !!!!
Children have died in the new Glasgow hospital because of contaminated water.
The New Edinburgh hospital that should have OPENED in 2012 is still UNFIT to open.
Does your wife have any particular reason for wanting her to keep her job ?
Nope, just feels she has done a good job over the last few weeks
You’re lying.
Why would someone vote down Facts about the NHS in Scotland……..Strange behaviour
HAHA I am in a creche….
And what do you do pray tell? Anything like the value to society of an A&E nurse? Or have you just a massive thumb?
Actually just get to fuck with that pish.
I think you just made that story up…
I’m with you Jimmybee, it was both stupid and arrogant, Nicola must be boiling, at least Mark McDonald, Derek McKay and Eck were men. However we have all made mistakes, this is just high profile like the Dean of the Faculty of Advocates broadcasting confidential information or Charles going to Scotland with the virus. By all accounts she is very good at her job, crazy to punt her as the pandemic is about to get to its peak. On the 3 rd of March Boris was telling everyone he shook hands with patients who had Covid 19 during a hospital visit, how did that work out for you B? People have said for 8 months Rangers will win the league, like I
say anyone can make a mistake.
Bullsh@t
These people are not in their positions necessarily because they are the best , they are there in the 1st instance because they are loyal to Nicola.
It seems the Scottish public just want a government of yes men/women.
What would be crazy is Not to remove her from her post.
But.
I would imagine in a time of national emergency due to a pandemic , the First ministers office would be aware of the movements of your Chief Medical Officer at all times , So for Nicola to State she was unaware of Calderwood visiting and staying in a holiday home 2 weekends in a row would be stretching the truth. Maybe it was in an email that never got opened , that’s a popular excuse nowadays.
If you are Professional you don’t make these ‘mistakes’.
Using other high profile peoples ‘ mistakes ‘ to excuse her is childish.
I see idiots every day standing next to one another , sharing a fag or a drink , and Calderwood has totally legitimised that type of behaviour for all these fools.
And Nicola has doubled down on that by not removing her.
Its not about whats best for Scotand , its about saving WEE KRANKIES FACE.
Cant and hubris are the mark of politicians of all persuasions. This woman is a doctor and in her professional life must live by her oath to ‘do no harm.’ She’s failed that test and will be quitely dispatched when the dust settles. But she’s a civil servant and not ‘SNP.’ The bigger picture for me is the havoc these second homers have wreaked on the East Nuke of Fife. Picture postcard villages with no locals, no shops, just Volvo estates arriving on Friday evening pre-loaded at Waitrose. The dicks hit the pub at 10pm, buy one drink and look down their noses of the regulars. Fuds.
SHE’S NOT A POLITICIAN WUCKFIT, SHE’S A CIVIL SERVANT.
Prince Andrew tells police he has never appeared in Panto and that he doesn’t have a right hand !
CAPTION.
NHS want new coil fitting procedure to be fun.
Caption Captain Birdseye brings out his new delux range of Fish fingers
Dogs.
Referees.
Nailed to wall, kind of at that Hampden Park.
New ref.
It`s not in our showing,though.
Tell us where to start from.
SFA/SPFL have the Bends.
If Broomland is open,fuck-off.
That is 3 more people died at the Burlington care home in Glasgow. So 16 people have died in 7 days. 2 members of staff have tested positive and are receiving treatment.
None of those who have died have been tested . These deaths will also not appear on the daily totals.
Surely this home should be temporarily evacuated , the whole place deep cleaned ,all staff and residents tested , then those residents not testing positive can return.
or……… are we now just allowing this to run uninterrupted through homes like this with these terrifying results?
Are you using the deaths of Scottish pensioners during a global pandemic to make more petty jibes about our government? If so I suggest that Follow Follow has all the threads you need for your entertainment.
Puggy I never mentioned any government in the above post.
You have not read it correctly , then tried to score a point against me. what a fud
Puggy
I never mentioned any government in the post.
I did offer an alternative other than just leaving people there to die.
What did you offer, directions to follow follow. very helpful.
And seriously , if you had a family member working there would you allow them to return , or a family member as a resident would you not insist on them being moved.
For me this is a sinister development.
Caption: Pizza Express,Woking.
Charlie
do you think there is any chance this is seen as a way of keeping official virus death numbers down?
High risk people just allowed to perish at home , or at a care facility because maybe they are deemed not worthy of any hospital attention. And at a time when seemingly we still have high capacity available at hospitals.
And of course skewing the death toll figures……..for what…..to hide their incompetence ? save money ? free up money ?
Or maybe to provide a wankfest to tinfoiled nappered conspiracy theorists with fuck all to offer?
puggy your obviously an ignorant p rick.
People have family either working or resident in that home and homes over the country.
But you just bury your head in the sand and tell yourself nothing to see here.
Caption: New ‘the rangers’ chairman claims ‘I’m no King puppet!’
Chief medical officer in Scotland has now resigned.