Yokerbhoy has been studying the runners and riders for the 3pm at glasgow, and offers his conclusions…
It’s been a while since we crossed swords with the Dingwall ding-dongs Dross County. In all fairness though, they’ve started their fresh stint in the top flight very brightly and have surprised a lot of people in the process. They currently lie in 5th place and recently enjoyed an impressive 2-1 away win at Motherwell but still have generally picked up their points against the more modest teams. Not only that but their defence is erratic and prone to off-days, notably when Livi put 4 past them on their own turf a few games ago. It’s quite remarkable that a town of barely 5,000 inhabitants could accommodate a team in the top tier and it has to be said that this 90 year old club has built up quite a history for themselves in recent times. After such a short time participating in the senior national leagues they have already been Scottish Cup runners up and have a League Cup triumph under their belts. All of that in the last few years. Way back at the end of season 66-67 they were probably the second happiest team in Scotland after having just won their first of three Highland League Championships. Having made all those positive comments about them, we Celtic fans will still have bitter memories of recent encounters with the highlanders in which they took industrial ‘football’ to extremes and took points of us with the help of some of the poorest refereeing performances in my living memory.
Among their current playing staff there is quite a Celtic connection as Marcus Fraser, Joe Chalmers and Michael Gardyne are all products of our youth system. Fraser only made one appearance for us back in 2011 but it was a happy occasion since he came on as a half-time sub on a night when we enjoyed a 3-1 home win against Rennes in Europe. He’s now the Staggies’ captain and has performed consistently well for them both in central defence and at right back. Chalmers, who only made 2 appearances as a CB in the Celtic first team around the same time as Fraser made his debut, has now re-invented himself as a ball-winning midfielder and has already notched up a couple of league goals this season. He was signed from ICT during the close season. Gardyne, on the other hand, never made the breakthrough into Celtic’s first team but has forged quite a decent career for himself in Scottish football having played an important role at Dundee Utd for three seasons and is now enjoying his second successful stint at County. Now a 33-year-old veteran, Gardyne can still be a really tricky and competitive wide player/forward/playmaker with bags of technical ability who plays a role similar to Niall McGinn’s at Aberdeen. He can be highly adept at providing killer passes, has a goal in him and will no doubt be considered a danger man when he faces us.
Their defence has been pretty solid so far this season partly thanks to the commanding presence of veteran Londoner Liam Fontaine, who was a very effective stalwart for Bristol City over several seasons and during his recent 4 year spell with Hibs he played in two Hampden finals, scoring the Edinburgh side’s goal in their 2-1 defeat in the League Cup by the very same Ross County as well as playing a key role in that memorable Hibees’ 3-2 pitch invasion day win in the Scottish Cup Final of 2016 against Warburton’s wallies. In central midfield ex-Thistle slugger Blair Spittal (another man with a dodgy surname) has been doing a solid job alongside Chalmers and tends to chip in with the odd goal or two while our own Ewan Henderson, who is on loan, won’t be allowed to play against us. Another contender to occupy a central midfield berth is giant Englishman Ross Draper, who was with ICT for 5 years before joing the Staggies a couple of years ago. The big man was out with a knee injury for a good while but is on the verge of a comeback and could well be on the bench. With last season’s main striker Declan McManus (singer Elvis Costello’s original name was Declan MacManus) being loaned out to Falkirk, the Staggies have been deploying two forwards in there most recent line-ups, Northern Irishman Billy Mckay has slotted in well to partner another youngster, top-scorer Ross Stewart, who is strong in the air, deceptively fast and has reached a tally of 4 league goals so far this season. They are likely to go with a 4-4-2 (or something similar) tomorrow and their team selection may look something like this:
Laidlaw
Watson Fraser Fontaine Foster
Gardyne Spittal Chalmers Grivosti
Mckay Stewart
In our camp we’ll definitely see at least a couple of changes from the team that lined up and performed so miserably against Livi the other week. Ntcham has generally done pretty well when called on so far this season but can still be something of an enigma. So many times he has come on as a sub and performed brilliantly yet the quality of his displays on average haven’t reached quite the same heights when he has been given a start. I’m pretty sure he’ll do a fine job for us tomorrow though while his link-up play with both Edouard and Forrest could turn out to be a vital ingredient in our attacking play. Rogic, if fit, might get some playing time and even make an impact but I won’t be holding my breath. Bauer has been playing quite well but I feel that Elhamed, who has fully recoverd from his virus, should be our first choice RB at the moment. It might be tempting to utilise Nir Bitton in the centre of defence as Ajer has been actively involved with his international team and could possibly do with a rest. Mikey Johnston is almost ready to go again but I don’t think he’ll be risked tomorrow. Elyounoussi is likely to play on the left wing, which is not a bad option but I’d like to see Sinky get a start for a change as I’m sure he’ll be hungry and hugely motivated to recapture his form of old. The Ross County LB Foster could prove to be a weak link so if Jamesie can hit top form, he could make great things happen for us down that right flank. The Staggies will no doubt play defensively and play on the counter with an industrial approach to the game but we’re used to that. Patience might be needed but using the width of the pitch and playing our natural free-flowing game, I don’t expect anything other than a comfortable win.
Forster
Elhamed Jullien Bitton Bolingoli
Brown McGregor
Forrest Ntcham Sinclair
Edouard
Subs: Gordon, Bauer, Ajer, Hayes, Rogic, Elyounoussi, Bayo
Prediction: Celtic 3 County 0 (same score as when we last played them)
Scorers: Edouard (2), Forrest
COYBIG
Paul Slane is a future star in the making the guy is a crack up. Funnier than billy Connolly and more talented and a better human being, on the game we are under pressure now to win every game. We have weaknesses against physically committed teams too many pretty boys.
No-one was funnier than Connolly in his prime. No-one!!
Richard Pryor was!
Les Dawson and Freddie star much funnier. Probably not royalists like Connolly. Connolly too much of an opportunist and England sycophant
For me Stanley Baxter was the funniest Scottish comedian. Brilliant !!
Loyalist prick. Making jokes about beheadings “just get on with it”
Use to go on about Partick thistle back in the day now it’s Celtic. Laughs hysterically at his own humour. Out shooting clay pigeons with the royals. Can’t stand the guy
Opportunist prick fuck him and the queen
PISH
spike milligan, peter sellers the list goes on and on…and they joked about more than wanking geeze a brek
An excellent and informative summary Yoker about the forthcoming game.
Well done you. The Dross County Ding Dongs will follow the template, of trying to get in our faces, press us high up the pitch, then run swiftly back in mass formations behind their castle walls, lifting the drawbridge up and throwing boiling hot oils and bricks from the ramparts. Celtic, the provider of the most young players to play in the SPFL. COYBIG.
Excellent piece Yoker, many thanks for your homework!
Cheers Devoy, glad you enjoyed it. Let’s hope the bhoys do the biz this afternoon to get this league campaign back on track.
Morning to you Mikey Bhoy, hope you’re keeping very well. I love your description of the visitors’ battle plan – there’s something positively medieval about most of the SPL sides when they come to visit us and even moreso when it comes to the referees and linesmen. Only the sheep, the huns and the hibees are prepared to go toe to toe and try to make a proper game of it when they come to CP.
The latest player news isn’t good as Ntcham is a serious doubt for today (big Aussie Tam might get his chance after all) while Mikey Johnston will need a further lay-off of at least a couple more weeks. Absolutely vital for the Hoops to be totally focussed today and make sure we get full points. Enjoy the game ma mhan!
Morning Yoker, That was perhaps your best ever summary, keep them coming. We are all fine. I went with Mrs. Mike last night to her Rural card game, with our Grand-daughter, yyaawwn, fell asleep through most of it, when I woke up, the Grand-daughter had won all the raffles (4) must have been rigged. We left carrying four boxes of biscuits, to be donated to Chas, plus a few pounds. The weather has been pishing down, getting the tatties out, well, lets just say that its challenging. I wont be posting much in the coming days, until they are out. So all the best to you and yours Yoker. “Hot Dogs” fuck knows why I’ve been saying that for days…. 😉
Yoker,
I’d like to see Scott Brown used more sparingly, Ajer should be in central midfield beside McGregor today.
Forster
Bauer
Elhamed
Jullien
Taylor
Ajer
McGregor
Forrest
Rogic
Elyounoussi
Edouard.
That would be my pick today.
Celtic 6 Ross County 0
Good team selection Monti although Broonie’s had his wee rest over the international break while Ajer hasn’t. Enjoy the game mate.
Spittal comes from “hospital” so not that dodgy.
Otherwise a good read – thanks.
I like to have a bit of fun with plays on words, which can always be a bit hit and miss. Something that shouldn’t be taken too seriously though as there’s never any harm intended.
Excellent piece Yokerbhoy. We have better footballers so must beat them and the ref with this.
Declan Patrick Aloysius McManus wrote some memorable songs, “Shipbuilding” with Robert Wyatt and “Tramp the Dirt Diwn” being but two. Any news on the up coming El Clasico and Barcelona’ s stance given the current situation there ?
Yes, the game has been re-scheduled for the week before Xmas.
Cheers Steve. Yeah, Elvis C was great right enough. A unique voice and style – “Pump it up” is my personal fave and I was fortunate enough to see him live in London at the end of the eighties. A win is an absolute must today.
Today’s line-up has just come out:
CELTIC: Forster, Frimpong, Jullien, Ajer, Bolingoli; Brown, Rogic, McGregor; Forrest, Edouard, Elyounoussi.
Subs: Gordon, Bitton, Bayo, Bauer, Hayes, Shved, Elhamed
The most interesting change is to see young Jeremie in there at RB. He had a great game against Thistle in the League Cup quarter final so I’m sure the lad should be fine again today. Oli sprained an ankle in training giving Rogic his chance to impress and it’s good to see Marian Shved available once again for selection.
Mon the Hoops!!
6-0….I TOLD YOU!
Spot on comrade. An ideal tonic before the Lazio double header as well. Total walkover the day – young Frimpong is a brilliant prospect.
Yoker,
Hopefully he can cement the position as his own!
You called it Monti. Some of our play today was as good as I’ve seen for a long time. Friimpong just got better as the game went on and our speed and angle of attacks was good. Some slackness still for me but well played Celts. Not even Robertson could do anything to influence the game.
He might well even though Elhamed has been superb. I can at least see him rise above Bauer in the pecking order.
El Hamed to left centre back Ajer into rest broony.Frimpong Bauer and the young Irish lad can all cover right back.
The young man certainly can play but has lots to learn still. Not ready to be first pick just yet
FCk BREXIT!
STOP IT NOW!
great article yoker but 3-0 hav a litte faith he he
🙂 Oh well, maybe 3-0 against Lazio then.
https://youtu.be/xmfCEcTLDes
stumbled on this wan on u tube so a thought thats wans for the perusal ae the crackpots he he aint lenny grand
sais thanks fur the tutorial oan how tae dae the smilie face but ma computers been threw the wars and the dots and dashes dont work he he ide buy a new wan but like lenny sais dont change sumfin that works ……..aint havin tae use a new computer shite he he
a telt a hun who disnae even no hees a zombie today that big billy made the aberdeen team that alex the fraud pretends he built google the team swallex pretended he built ha ha ha ha aint huns dumb
swallex got knighted billy got a statue outside parkheid wit wid you rather have …….AM WAE BIG BILLY GOD BLESSUM
THE MOST SUCCESSFUL ABERDEEN TEAM WAS BUILT BY BIG BILLY ….GOOGLE IT
https://youtu.be/nLYcB1rXqfE
Great result yesterday…should have been a bagful… I was in Derry yesterday watching my Reds beat institute 3 0, again should have been a bagful
Peter picked a pickled pepper, a pickled pepper did Peter pick. But stick to your algebra and algorism Peter.. leave the pickled player purchase to others… Cesar, Cesar, Cesar, (sixtae seven). Big Billy didn’t receive the credit that he deserved for the renascence of..
Aberdeen, Aberdeen, Aberdeen, could’ny kick a Jelly Bean. Although to be fair to Fergie, he did acknowledge Billy’s contribution… (67).
Jambos are 1-0 up against the KKK after half an hour. Long may this continue.
Huns drop 2 pts 🙂
That’s quite a happy ending. Watched the second half – a dour physical battle with very little quality on view. It knocks the huns of their perch as we now have the same points and the same goal difference but we’ve scored a goal more. Meanwhile the wee huns remain in the relegation battle zone. I reckon the monkeys will have serious problems coping with the pressures of this title fight.
HH
https://youtu.be/tjNGsUmJzIM
Charlie,
The one with the broken arse….is that Una?
“Rangers” won the International break, but apart from having inferior players-team and that they had much more home games and dirtied their nappy at being top. Celtic have restored natural order, looking forward to more home games with far superior players, towards 😉 <9
We’re “Back at the top” going for 9 INAR,
Back at the top, looking down,
At the jobbies below,
“Back at the top” going for 9 INAR,
Looking down on the Huns,
Who have no-where to go.
spike milligan, peter sellers the list goes on and on…and they joked about more than wa&nking geeze a brek
The manky mob will be in for a serious roasting at the Dragon Stadium when they meet FC Porto on Thursday. That should dent their confidence a bit more.
if we plaY like that every week no one will even get close
Just a thought about the Orcs and us.
Both of us are more likely to win at home than away.
For us, away grounds where we have dropped points or might slip up are:
Mordor
Aberdeen
Hearts
Hibs
Killie
Livingston
Same for the Orcs, with Celtic Park being their toughest away ground.
So far this season of those 6 away venues we have played at 3 of them already, dropping points at two of them, proving a point.
The Orcs have only played at 2 of them, dropping points today, also proving my point.
Until the Christmas break, we will play at 2 of these tough six venues whilst the Orcs will play at 4 of them.
The Orcs usually get their major breaks (penalties/red cards etc) at Mordor but sometimes don’t get those breaks away.
The schedule has been much tougher on us until now but what goes round comes round.
We also beat Motherwell away but the Orcs have to play them away before the break.
As Howlin Wolf said, “sittin on top …” Hail, hail….
Stupid, stupid Huns!
We shall not be moved we shall not we shall not be moved we shall not we shall not be moved not by the hearts the Hibs or some dead club we shall not be moved all together now!!
Or billy Connolly s Partick thistle although I’ve a soft spot for the jags I grew up in maryhill
Lol I don’t see Marie osmond jumping on the Celtic bandwagon. She stuck with KIllie. Paper roses . The crucifixion and the camping trip were the big yin’s best work. Struggling comic plagiarising shipbuilders humour made a fortune out of it. You know he was booed off the stage in Brisbane in the 70s. Hecklers made him leave the stage. Fair play to him he played the system . If you hear his anti Scottish cap in hand bullshit on Parkinson and other interviews. You’ll find he says things to further his career. He’s now put his support for independence. As far as child abuse is concerned well that’s tragic. Though he comes across as disingenuous. When he was asked about his disgraceful comments regarding the beheadings he abused a reporter. The guy has little to no substance
Talking Pish, The lot of you, there was only one truly immortal comedian, he hail, hailed from the “Pool”, he kept audiences captured in every sense and had more wit and wisdom than any other performer, a man who loved Hector and his name was KEN DIDDLY DODD, Knotty Snotty Ash.
PISH
Tears for souvenirs are all you’ve left me
Memories of a love you never meant, ya two timing bassa!