Celtic Diary Monday July 22: The Really Silly Season

Arsenal are about to make their third bid for Keiran Tierney.

Or it could be their fourth. Or even their first, depending on who you believe.

Apparently they’ve agreed that the fee will be £25m but they don;t want to pay it all up front, and will pay the rest according to certain conditions which they want to attach. Such as Champions League qualification, how many clean sheets they keep and whether or not they can manage that elusive win in the boat race.

Accordingly, Celtic have refused their offer.

Here’s the thing, though. If the fee has been accepted, that would be a green light for other clubs to put in their offers, and thus far, there have been no other offers, which is odd for a player of Tierney’s calibre.

This one is set to run and run…

 

Someone else attracting interest is Jozo Simunovic, who is the subject of £5m worth of interest from Lille, whose manager said of the Croatian;

He’s a very good player with a knowledge of European football. 

Which is about as on -committal as you can get.

Liam Morrison, the sixteen year old linked with a move to Bayern Munich may yet be dissuaded from leaving, though it’s hard to believe the lad sees more chance of breaking through in Bavaria than he does in Glasgow.

However, the experience would probably be useful for him.

Hatem Ebd Alhamed only needs to cross the t’s and dot the i’s to become a Celtic player, and Beram Kayal, who had a couple of years at Celtic, advised his compatriot to go for it..

This is a big opportunity for Hatem. I’m so happy for him to get the chance to join a big club like Celtic. Obviously he asked me for advice because I would class him as a friend.

“What did I say to him? I told him that it will probably be the best day of his life when he signs for Celtic. 

“He’s a really good player and, most importantly, he’s ready to be a Celtic player.

When you are joining such a big club as Celtic then you need experience and he has that now, including making his debut for the international team.

“He was in Gent in Belgium but it didn’t work out and he returned to Israel.

“This is now the time for him as I believe he has a stronger mentality and he is more 
experienced.

“He’s really fast, knows how to defend and he’s calm with the ball at his feet. He can play in two positions, right back and centre back, so that versatility is also an advantage.]

“I know him as a centre back. I know he has played right back a few times so I don’t know what the club has planned for him. 

Well, thats made us all feel better.

Tyneside No.1 CSC have come up with and put in place an excellent idea, which other clubs may feel worth copying to some degree..

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Co-operation between CSCs worldwide could be very helpful to all of us, for one reason or another. Help with tickets, accommodation and merchandising can never be turned down.

Hope it all works out for them.

 

That Italins fellow, Bertolacci ? Another mischievous internet rumour..

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Whoever would dream of doing such a thing ?

Then again, who can really figure out why anyone does anything.

We’ve seen some golden comedy moments over the last seven years as a section of Scottish society refused to face reality as their favourite club died.

This, however, from Ibrox Noise, is surely the greatest of them all. If awards were awarded for bullshit, this would scoop the board..

If there’s one thing we’re saturated by on Ibrox Noise, it’s the obsessed coming in telling us how terrible our team is and how we’re no match for them. Oh, and we’re dead. All that piffle.

Funny thing is over the past three weeks, the amount of nonsense from those of a green and white persuasion has notably reduced, and we couldn’t imagine why (!)

Is it the ‘goals for’ column which has looked slightly absurd in its proliferation of stats? Or is it the fact the goals against one still remains completely empty?

Or could it be the focal point of today’s piece of exquisite Ibrox Noise optimism, and the increasing ‘asset management’ issue Rangers now have?

If we go back 12 months, the only ‘asset’ Rangers really had was Alfredo Morelos and, at a pinch, James Tavernier. We didn’t have many players worth much at all.

July 2019 that has changed to unrecognisable levels.

Rangers are now packed with experienced internationals, with winners, and with players of rising international stock and coveted names. 

Image result for laurel and hardy laughing gif

Let’s go through one-by-one at the players who are starting to look like Rangers’ crown jewels of genuine financial value: 

He may have misunderstood the meaning of “genuine ” . Or even “value “.

James Tavernier:

The reality is this guy, signed for £250K in 2015, was without any doubt Mark Warburton’s finest hour. He has grown into a genuine £15M+ player. Ok, he has no Champions League or international experience to his credit, but he’s delivered frightening stats both domestically and in Europe, and even the majority of green and white fans have put him at RB in an ‘ultimate OF XI’. He’s worth a lot of cash now. 

Borna Barisic:

Yes, this one is more theoretical right now because Barisic has only delivered on the international stage for sure, and while his Rangers career is certainly improving he has a bit to go before he proves the Croatia Barisic is in the light blue for certain. BUT. If the Croatia man does consistently deliver for his club then we’re talking top dollar value for a genuinely world class player. It’s not absurd to suggest a value above £20M for a Croat international if a Scotland one with barely-working limbs is worth more than £25M.

Glen Kamara:

Yes, he needs to weed those lazy errors out of his game, but he’s otherwise the complete midfielder and the £65K for him is looking absurd. A Fin international with 13+ caps and experience of the highest order at only 23, Kamara’s value is almost stratospheric with colossal potential. He learned his trade at one of England’s finest academies in Arsenal, and could only last a short spell at Dundee before a big club came for him. There is little doubt Glen Kamara, if he continues to develop like this, could be worth mammoth money in the future. We’re talking that same £20M value for sure. Maybe more.

Joe Aribo:

Just 22, nearly 23, Aribo was spun to us as a £10M player for barely £250K. After his first couple of outings in our shirt we weren’t convinced. After the last two, £10M would be a bargain for someone. An Aribo in first gear, half asleep, completely destroyed two sides in a row over the course of barely 30 minutes. Imagine what this kid can do in fifth gear in the serious business. The mind boggles and we can barely even guesstimate on this one, but definitely the £20M region again. 

Scott Arfield:

A coveted player down south with at least four or five excellent years left in him, he’s been an inspirational signing and while his age counts a little against him, his experience is vital and Southampton at least have been credited with interest. He had a stunning split, a stunning season overall (a genuine disgrace he was overlooked for POTY nominations) and he produced again in America for the Gold Cup. His assist last night as a rusty sub for Defoe’s hat trick just summed him up. If anyone wanted him they’d have to dig deep for his services. £10M-£15M.

Jordan Jones:

An NI international hitting his peak and assisting for fun? His stats at Killie were excellent and his performances for the Ulster Boys proved he could do it on a higher stage than the SPL. He’s got to prove it of course over the course of the season but early signs are good for the winger. More dangerous than Ryan Kent who’s supposed to be worth £12M, Jones has potential to reach £15M and beyond.

Alfredo Morelos:

Yes, this is a tricky one. His value goes up and down with his attitude, displays, and the wind really. At peak this Colombian international with a tonne of UEL experience at only 23 could be worth well over £20M, bordering into £30M. But when he goes testy or quiet or gets himself sent off he’s down to £5M tops. He requires a club to take a bit of a risk on him, but then what signing isn’t? 

So, potential numbers: 

Tav: £15M
Barisic: £20M
Kamara: £20M
Aribo: £20M
Arfield: £15M
Jones: £15M
Morelos: £25M

A grand theoretical total of £130M.

Of course, that’s crazy numbers – we’re not going to sell this lot for that money and suddenly have £130M. Nothing like it. It’s just an illustration, individually, that Rangers now have valuable assets and there’s no point pretending that we could only get £1.5M for a James Tavernier or similar. If Rangers are to sell any prize players, we’ll expect big money for them. That’s the way the market is now. 

Odd how he fails to list all the bids that they have received for their £130m worth of talent.

Oh, I know why….

 

Then again, can you blame them when the media puts out such guff as this…

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Remember, they won nothing…and never really looked as though they would.

Moreles, incidentally , is now their leading all time top scorer…

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There’s some illustrious names on that list..

The most illustrious name at Ibrox is that of Steven Gerrard, the new manager who has guided them on the latest stage of their journey.

And he reckons he’s getting better, as are his club.

They drew with Blackburn at the weekend, a game where fans were charged £12 to watch on Rangers TV…

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They didn’t notice straight away, as the screen just continued to show arseholes..

Gerrard did notice something about his team though..

It was a really interesting game,” he said. “We edged the first-half, I thought we were a lot better ourselves than we were second-half.

“We’re pleased with a lot of the performance, although we were a bit loose at times.

“The players and the level was a step up, Blackburn are a good team. If you’re sloppy and turn the ball over, you’ll get punished.” 

Turn the ball over ?

Going back to last season, the likes of where we played Hibs, our mistakes were costly for us in the league campaign,” Gerrard added.

“We were loose, we turned the ball over and we paid for it. 

Turned the ball over ?

Pre-season games are, first and foremost, to get fit. But you try to rehearse how you want it to look in the upcoming season.

“So we’ll definitely take the positives, for the majority of the game.

“The two lessons we’ll take from the game are we need to kill teams off and we can’t turn the ball over in dangerous areas because good teams and good players will punish you.” 

Right, lads. Let’s not turn the ball over.

We have to go back to Thursday for the last caption competition..

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Arsene Parcelie July 18, 2019 at 10:54 am · Edit · Reply →

Caption:
“ALL TOGETHER NOW!”
“We’re on the one road sharing the one load
we’re on the road to God knows where
We’re on the one road 
Maybe the wrong road… ah now, look at that there.”  

today..

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D'Fhinnein Mick
1 year ago

Not so much a caption,but I remember being at Ibrox,in the old enclosure when Davie Provan was having one of his days. Rangers defenders with twisted blood. He left Davie McKinnon literally on the ground,passed it inside and said…

“I could keep a beachball off you in a telephone box”

Magdalena’s Chestnut Gelding
1 year ago

He said it to Alex McDonald

D'Fhinnein Mick
1 year ago

RALPH

You’ve gorra laff at the optimism of the huns,but £130m for these guys. Fuxake. Thick as pigshit in the neck of a bottle.

HoudiniBhoy
1 year ago

Caption: New Away Fan zone at Celtic Park “will meet travelling away supports needs” says Peter Lawwell.

Honest hoops
1 year ago

Caption;Mrs rabbit is the look out, as Mr rabbit starts the rumour mill that was handed to him by jabba the hun…

Jinkylarrson
1 year ago

Caption…beware and loose the squirrels of war.

Whitearra
1 year ago

Caption : I’m telling ye, I just see the new Celtic away strip….

Jinkylarrson
1 year ago

CAPTION….Angers f.c.give players New mobiles.

Mike
1 year ago

Sneaky Bassa, bringing out the diary five minutes before the next round C.L. draw. But then again, we have still two games left to play in round two, Lenny for one will not be accepting that as a win-win, no he will give the Estonians, Nomme-enee- Faither, full respect.
I read Ibraimi’s account of the tie he played against Kalju for Shkendija, when they were put out by a backheel goal in the last minute. He said ” they play with four at the back which is reinforced by the three midfielders and try to hit on the counter”, so it will not be a walkover. Ibraimi, played against us for Maribor in 2014. But he is convinced that we shall prevail. Remember when the Scotsman was a serious newspaper, not the second edition of the “Ibrox Noise” for months they have been trying there hardest to punt Morelos for about £20.00 mill. them and their ilk, have made the Scottish press a laughing stock..

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

Cluj or Maccabi Tel Aviv… Round three if we beat Kaliju..

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

SCS CFR 1907 Cluj put out Astana in the last round, Maccabi Tel Aviv enter the competition in the third round. At least its not PAOK of Greece who get Ajax.. So it could be off too Romania, Transylvania, stakes out, sharpened and ready…

Yoker Bhoy
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

Mikey, I was in Cluj Napoca a few years back and it’s a really nice place to visit. I’d describe it as a sleepy University city full of attractive gardens and marvellous historical churches. The locals are very friendly too. I’ll say more on that if we do eventually get to meet them but we (and they) have a tough hurdle to negotiate beforehand. Yes, the draw could have been a lot worse – the invincible double winners of PAOK were the ones we wanted to avoid. I hope you’re keeping well and your arthritis is on the mend. Brilliant win for Shay Laury in the Open – I watched a good chunk of his amazing round of 63 on Saturday, scintillating stuff!

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Yoker Bhoy

Hi Yoker, The Wickers world of E-Tims. 😉
Sounds like a lovely place with a touch of Seville. We are all good here mate and thank you for asking. If I remember rightly Cluj had a great reputation some years back, a formidable foe. I was just saying to myself a wee prayer yesterday that the draw-gods were good to us, I looked at who we could face and this was nearly the best one that we could have hoped for, but they are all difficult at this time, if only our DoF had brought in the players we need to see us give it our best try. Shay Laury was brilliant and had a wonderful following, so well done and Go Shay Go. Hope things are good for you and yours and look forward to hearing your fitbaw views, in the not too distant future, Go Yoker Go.

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike
Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

Shane Lowry sings “The Fields of Athenry after winning the open 😉 ^ ^

Yoker Bhoy
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

Quality! 🙂

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

Has the claret jug ever been seen such scenes? A blootered caddy and sheer enjoyment takes wings into the rafters. Go Shane Go… 😉 <9

Salad queen
1 year ago

Quick call Peter I can see the sevco are coming.

1 year ago

Sevco? It is illegal to trade whilst insolvent, yet again…

Patrick o Hara
1 year ago

Caption. Daddy bear phones Ralph to tell him how to”turn over”a bowl of honey. Simples.

Puggy67
1 year ago

Caption: Hello Daily Record hotline it’s Billy fae Saltcoats. Glory, warchest, staunch, dignity and an insult wi’ a h in it. Could you put that in a sentence for us?

Puggy67
1 year ago

Caption: Hello science lab it’s the rabbit that escaped last week, it’s been non-stop sex and carrot fields but I want to come back, I’m desperate for a smoke.

greenmaestro
1 year ago

caption – Shout when you see the rangers coming I’ll phone it in.

Matt gallagher
1 year ago

Here you, keep an eye out so I do a shite.

George Lazenbhoy
1 year ago

Caption : sylvanian families new ‘drug dealer and look out’ set.

Monti
1 year ago

A still of their mothers?

Puggy67
1 year ago

Porn’s the only way they can get past a semi.

Mike
1 year ago

as Danny Simpson is told to GTF. We remember that auld Dutch song..
Tulips from Amsterdam, Stick them up your “Ole”.
15 Dutch fans will go on trial in Amsterdam in September for attacking Celtic pubs in the East end of Glasgow, in 2015, haud oan, attacked in Glasgow, on trial in Holland, that canny be right, can it?
No-one from the crown office will be in attendance, eh? One pub manager was severely beaten and left with three plates on his head, oh, he must have been that Amsterdam undercover officer who was so intent in baton-ing a Celtic supporter that he ran intae a lamp-post. Five Celtic supporters was jailed in 2013 when the Tic. played Ajax in a C.L. qualifier, 44 of them arrested, even the Ajax ultras said that the Polis had used excessive force, of course Police Scotland were over there providing further proof of names and pointing out the guilty, did they ever consider that they should have tried to protect them, of course not. The Mayor of Amsterdam, should get his windies caved in for that official welcome… “Ole- Moley”

Carljunglebhoy
1 year ago
Reply to  Mike

There’s justice and there’s #DamJustice. BTW/ FYI The mayor of Amsterdam who was in office when the dam burst – and tried (along with the chief of police) to lay all the blame on “drunken Celtic fans” died of cancer a couple of years ago. Since then there have couple been 3 more mayors (currently a woman), a chief of police who admitted mistakes were made, and an unprecedented ruling in the judiciary during the long delayed appeal scathing about the unreliability of police evidence.

Mike
1 year ago
Reply to  Carljunglebhoy

And with good reason Carl…

liftedinmoscow
1 year ago

I love Ibrox Noise, makes me chuckle every time I look at it, well worth a read.. The day after they posted that assessment on their playing pool ‘worth’ they picked their ‘best’ starting eleven for the coming season and £20m Tvaernier was on the bench! Them guys really have to get off the glue.

1 year ago

Caption,Hello is that chris jack?I have a exclusive for you,my name?oh its Bertolacci

jimmybee
1 year ago

Big Mike has just put the final nail in sevco coffin. According to the judge he is owed many millions of pounds. Let the jelly and ice cream be served. HH

jimmybee
1 year ago

Sevco face a bill to Sports Direct that will ‘be in the order of many millions of pounds’ that the club admits will effect ‘their ability to function as a football club will be impaired.’

After two years of disputes and breaches of a contract that they signed upto in the summer of 2017 the end game is finally nearing for Dave King’s regime after Sports Direct lost out in order to fund the Pedro and Gerrard Revolutions.

A 28 page ruling has been published today that is virtually holly in favour of Sports Direct providing a classic case of breaking corporate governance.

The last hearing was at the end of May with today’s verdict published with two devastating passages.

The judge said

If relevant, I am satisfied that damages are not an adequate remedy for Rangers’breaches. SDIR’s losses are likely to be in the order of many millions of pounds.

Rangers has pleaded in the hope that it would rely upon clause16.3 of the Non-Exclusive RightAgreement to limit its damagesto £1,000,000.

I accept SDIR’s submission that it would be unjust to deprive SDIR of the benefit of its matching right provisions.”

PAGE 27, POINT 94

Rangers assert that an injunction should not be granted because:-
(1) It will lose significant revenues and will be exposed to claims for damages from Elite.
(2) The club, players and fans will be unable secure kit and other products; and
(3) Rangers’ ability to function as a football club will be impaired.

Part of the claim from Sports Direct will ban the sale of the Away and Change kits for this season and next.

Close Brothers have a security over Ibrox which can be called in at any stage, on the back of this ruling it’s likely that Hummel will be reviewing their contract with the club .

Candeillas is already been sold for less than valued the fire sale begins.

The Cha
1 year ago
Reply to  jimmybee

It’s all very sad. 😉

1 year ago
Reply to  The Cha

CHA… I feel your deep emotion in those 4 wee words… Here’s my 4…Let the bastards burn..

BroxburnBhoy
1 year ago
Reply to  jimmybee

wonder what the SFA view of this ruling might be?

alzyerpal
1 year ago

Caption: “Yes daddy. She is standing at the roadside looking for your car. She is dying to show you how well she has learned, not to turn the ball over”

Magdalena’s Chestnut Gelding
1 year ago

Caption

“Right Beryl, you keep the edgy while I have a shite in this phone box!”

jimmybee
1 year ago

Caption: He wants to know if you can see them coming!

Magdalena’s Chestnut Gelding
1 year ago

Caption

“Fiona, just you wait there, um next oan!”

“Hello Hello can ah speek tae Derek puleeese?”

“Hello Hello Kyle, how are you brother?”

“See theym Derek, see theym kaffliks and judges and English business men, see theym, they huv just got it in fur the wurlds most suksessfool klub n that Derek, obsessed speedos an that, no surrendur Derek!”

“Burp, absolutely”

Puggy67
1 year ago

Dear me porn during a Sevco game, is that the only way they can get to a semi these days?

Puggy67
1 year ago

Caption: Police please I’m being stalked by a wee baldy guy with a shotgun, looks like a Wangers fan.

Carljunglebhoy
1 year ago

Caption: Despite attempts to re-brand Morelos as a cheeky, fluffy , cuddly bunny, the team of helpers manning the phones 24/7 have been downsized to 1 animal with big ears in a phone box. “Sorry – Wrong number”

henkesdreadlocks
1 year ago

Caption………..

Hello, is that Apple? Just to let you know, yer batteries are shite.

Monti
1 year ago

“No it’s carrot, you are number 150 in the queue, your call is important to us so stay on the line”

jimmybee
1 year ago

We must ensure that on the field we give our manager the players he requires to continue our domination. We cannot take our eye of the ball and let’s hope Peter doesnt just sit back now there is work to be done to make us better and stronger. The squad is the weakest we have been for some time. We need players in quickly.

Monti
1 year ago
Reply to  jimmybee

CS,
As long as the players arrive i’d agree…..but i just don’t trust this board.

Mike
1 year ago

“Go Shane Go” As Candy-ass prepares to leave for pastures new, “Gott en Hummell” for a reputed Nae laughing at the back £300 thou. Morelos’s value on the transfer mart is 3.00 mill. euros. So that should keep Close Brothers happy, for the moment. Instalments to purchase one player and season ticket monies to help keep the lights on. No doubt but they will be fined after losing the judgement and that should help Ashley recover some of the monies that he’s lost during his latest business shenanigans.
I keep getting flashbacks of King wearing a tutu and BFDJ standing behind him wearing nothing but a gimp mask, perhaps its the other way about.. So thanks for that..

Uralius
1 year ago

Caption: I swear to God they aren’t. I know it’s round, but no! They are not turning it over.

jimmybee
1 year ago

Caption:Its Jimmy bell says he would take any Hummel stock we have and Iron on badges.
He will be up the road shortly in a park’s of Hamilton bus. Get ready he wants 55 of everything
Taps shorts and socks.

Uralius
1 year ago

Quick mention of that one bloke. Got to take my hat off to him for how he handled the Griffiths situation.

Mike
1 year ago

Like in life, time passes so quickly, it will not be long before this transfer window closes, it would be great news indeed if our ain bhoy KT. stayed with us for another season, I cannot see it, but fingers crossed. We still need a back up right back (O’Donnell) ? perhaps, but IMO I still want to see a strong midfielder, someone else to win the midfield battles to come. Any other player addition for the first team squad at centre-forward would be welcome. F.F.F. Ta Ta.
August the eighth, Go Cellic Go….

Puggy67
1 year ago

Sport socks and a big mug when Sevco die.

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