The Alternative Celtic FC Festival

The Alternative Celtic FC Festival

As the SSE Hydro prepares to don the green and white hoops of lights in celebration of the Celtic FC Festival



E-Tims would like to suggest an Alternative Celtic Festival where you can enjoy such classic Celtic based delights as :


Find Res 12

In this wacky game for all ages, Celtic FC challenge you to try and find Res 12..

The Celtic Board have somehow ( yet again) lost it and reluctantly need your help to find it!

  • Will it be buried under Peters driveway?
  • Will it be down Dermots couch?
  • Will it be lying burnt in the trash?

Who knows but you only have 100 years to find it before Celtic ask how you’re getting on!


The Lennoxtown Assault Course Challenge

You may have seen Who Dares Wins!, you may remember Total WipeOut!

You might be old enough to remember Gladiators and you may even be a Celtic Da who remembers The Krypton Factor but they are all easy peasy lemon squeezy hands and kneesy compared to the monster that is The Lennoxtown Assault Course Challenge.

No tough mudder can touch this tough mother****** as it takes on all comers and breaks their spirit and their bones. Dare you take your place for a Lennoxtown training session?

Be afraid, be very afraid!

**Medical Insurance is available from Celtic Healthcare Plc Ltd – see kiosk**


The Pie Run

A fun challenge for all those young fans out there.

If you are young enough to qualify to be a member of the plucky Celtic catering staff, then this cheeky culinary challenge is perfect for you.

Celtic FC  Catering Outsourcing Plc ltd dare you to pick up a tray of hot cooked pies and try and carry them aloft through a full size replica of the packed main stand concourse. Your goal is to reach the Catering stand at the end ensuring all the pies are lukewarm and slightly soggy.


Points will be deducted if pies are deemed as still edible by National food standard referees.

A Golden Bovril cup awaits the lucky winner and the potential to bid for a zero hours contract.


Be a true Ex-Celt Media Analyst

Step up all Celtic Da’s..this could be right up your street!

Ever fancied your chances as a commentator?

Ever listened to Andy Walker and thought  “He is far too positive about Celtic today!” or tuned into Davie Provan and thought “Jeezoh Davie, get them slaughtered man, enough of the soft approach please!”

If so, then come join the Sky Sports SPFL crew along with Kris Commons as he takes you through the basics of being a right old Grumble McGripe on camera.



We will even get you on tape to give the Bhoys a right sad old slagging and you can purchase the recording from Celtic Media plc Ltd on the same day, subject to postage and packing charges.

If you’re really lucky then Sky Sports might just get to enjoy that Audition tape! **

**Celtic Media plc Ltd retain an Introduction fee of 40% for any Sky contracts offered


Draw a Hoop on a Shirt

Are you between 3 and 9 years of age? If so then we have the classic game for you?

Celtic FC Merchandise Plc Ltd proudly present “Draw A Hoop on a Shirt”, the classic piece of entertainment that never fails season after season.

Step up and show us if you can beat the Design team from New Balance to see who can draw a full green Hoop upon a white shirt? ( wee clue..its not NB)

Race against the clock to meet the Marketing deadline and you can even take the jersey home with you ( Official pure white jersey must be purchased from Superstore concession before entry)

NB Please bring your own green pens.


The Celticrity Puzzle Poser

Can you help the Groundsman from Celtic Park & Outhouses Plc Ltd out?


One of the 4000 brand new superlights isn’t working and he urgently needs a hand.

You only have the time it takes the Champions League theme tune to play to help him find it before the fans realise the squad only gets replenished after Petes disco lights pet projects.



Please come and join us with a smile and a full wallet to enjoy these great activities and many many more…please put your suggestions in comments below..