Celtic Diary Thursday July 4: Another One In…

Boli Bolingoli Mbombo has signed a four year deal to become part of the new look Celtic.

He seems pretty happy about that..

“It feels great to have signed for Celtic,” 

“It feels amazing, actually, to be part of the Celtic Family.

I’m happy to be here at this club, and hopefully I can help win more titles and trophies. This club wants to continue breaking records, and hopefully we can do that in the future together.

“I heard last week that the club were interested in me, they contacted my agent, and I said yes immediately. You can’t say no to a club like Celtic.” 

“Celtic have always had great players and, of course, they’ve had a number of great Belgians too. Dedryck Boyata is one of them, and I’m happy to follow in a similar path. He had a positive influence on this club and hopefully I can do the same. I’m fast, and I use my skills and my speed on the left side. I love to play football and I enjoy my football.

“I can’t wait to play at Celtic Park in front of 60,000 fans, for sure, that’s what I’ve been dreaming about, to play in the stadium, to play in that atmosphere. There was a great atmosphere at Rapid Vienna’s games, but I think that it could be double, maybe triple that atmosphere here.

“I can’t wait to play in this beautiful stadium, in the same colours – I must love green and white. I cannot wait!” 

He kind of spoiled it a bit by saying he wanted to follow the same path as Dedryck Boyata, but I think he meant to the national team, and not in a behavioural sense.

So that’s half the new defence in, and thoughts now turn to a right back, and there are a couple of well known names in the frame, but there is little concrete information at the moment.

Ah, wait, some concrete information…

Concrete is made up of three basic components: water, aggregate (rock, sand, or gravel) and Portland cement. Cement, usually in powder form, acts as a binding agent when mixed with water and aggregates. 

All I will do is mention the two names I’ve made up, and remind you that the club policy is to pursue players that they are fully aware of, and have been for a while.

Colin Dagba and Timothy Castagne.

The former would be a loan and purchase, the latter would be simply resuming earlier interest now that Brendan has gone.

One other thing we have heard, Vakoun Bayo is injured again.

This could be the start of a regular pattern….


Actually, todays biggest rumour concerns another club, and a possible change of management.

Frank Lampard has gone to Chelsea, which leaves a vacancy at Derby county, and Steven Gerrard has been touted for the position.

Is it a coincidence that Alex McLeish has suddenly entered the public domain again ?

Kieran Tierney ready for ‘more important club’ than Celtic claims former Scotland boss Alex McLeish.

What better way to endear himself to the dark side than by slating Celtic and trying to influence one of their best players to leave ?

The dopey old ginge was talking to Radio Marte, in Italy.

Tierney is ready for the big jump and to go to a more important club than Celtic. 

When his team played Barcelona, Manchester City or Paris Saint-Germain in the Champions League, he always stood out, and that makes him ready.

“He’s got attacking qualities, but is also a great defender.

“He’s very young and while he had a few injuries, there’s no particular problems.

“He’s really quick and not only a player who knows how to defender. He’s got stamina, can run many kilometres without stopping.

“We’re talking about a real athlete. Ancelotti has the right to get the best out of Tierney’s potential, and Napoli would be a great step for him.” 

Could this be part of a Level 5 plan to make MacLeish acceptable to the hordes when the scales finally fall off Gerrard’s eyes ?

After all, Celtic fans by and large have accepted the return of Lennon…

Returning to Gerrard for a moment, who’d have possibly predicted he would be the type of guy to manage “rangers ” one day..


Up yie Gerrard ya cunt. Our third choice 19 yr old right back takes baw off you and you hack him down.

The signs were there, but only a few noticed them…


Meanwhile, if you think the Scottish media is fairly low brow, have a look at this from the Daily Star..

Arsenal target Kieran Tierney ‘boards flight’ to London… is Celtic ace close to joining?

ARSENAL target Kieran Tierney has allegedly boarded a flight to London – so is he closing in on a move to the Emirates Stadium? 

It’s no secret that Arsenal is Teirney’s preferred destination, should he move, but as there is no picture of him actually boarding a plane to London the Star backs up their story with a picture of Tierney.. and a picture of a plane.

Arsenal target Kieran Tierney has allegedly boarded a flight to London amid rumours of his exit

We are aware that the club will continue to try to talk Tierney out of a move, and we also appreciate that there is an awful lot going on in the lads mind.

What we would like to clarify is that we wish the lad all the best should he go, though we’d rather he didn’t…that big money move will come, despite those telling him that it’s now or never, and constantly reminding him he might get injured, or run over by a bus..

Can we remind Tierney that he might not , in fact get injured.

Or run over by a bus.

He might well go on to be a legend, remembered forever among generations of Celtic fans instead…

Or he could go to Arsenal, but look what happened to the last high profile Celt that went to Arsenal..

 Image result for charlie nicholas

One other piece of tittle tattle that appears to have been put to bed is the story that Martin O’Neill, sacked by Nottingham Forrest , could return to Celtic as some sort of director of football.

A reporter dropped this on Neil Lennon, and he appears to have brushed it aside..

Could he come back   here in some role? He is fed up telling me what to do. He’s been doing it for 25 years! That would be an interesting one, but it’s not on the horizon,

Meanwhile, the hordes are upset at a possible record breaking kit deal between Celtic and Adidas..

 Sooner or later, one of them will end up in the dock for this kind of inference.

I understand the club policy of not giving these muppets the oxygen of publicity, but sometimes that can be mistaken for weakness.

It’s time one of them was held to account.

Good luck to future Celt David Turnbull, who has completed the first stage of his journey to Celtic Park..

Yesterday, we had this…

alzyerpal July 3, 2019 at 2:10 pm · Edit · Reply →

Caption : In 1970, Rod Petrie managed to sell Peter Marinello to Arsenal for £100,000, despite doubts about his fitness. 


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Caption: Emdy want tae take a stab at this?


Pretty good ^^^^

Albert Kidd

Throwing dusters and chalk didn’t quite cut it.


Caption : Awright, Mr Einstein isnae coming the day. So before a start the school dinners, you’ve goat to learn this.

And just as in sub atomic physics where light can sometimes behave as a particle or a wave, so vee see zat zee Old rangers is exactly zee same club as zee Sevco New club.

And iff you believe zat you must think zat zee moon is made of green cheese, und you can fuck off out of my class you moron before I cut your balls off with zis knife.

Rab Rae

CAP.: Radio Marte interviewer: “Sei una sfigata.”


Pat Butcher couldnt hide her eastenders past.

Arsene Parcelie

“Under pressure you don’t rise to the equation;
You sink to the level of your training.
That’s why we train so hard.
Anybody that doesn’t train hard gets this in the face.”


“Now, children, here is the actual solution to Schrödinger’s Club, and I am about to take the lid of the box. If it’s still alive, I’ll put everyone out of our misery”.


Caption: And they blame catholic schools…..

Honest hoops

Caption; a new initiative launched by the education board….how to learn by fear…

Caption… ” now boys and girls I’m counting on you to get these sums right … or you’ll get the sharp edge of my tongue”


Welcome to Celtic Bolingoli-Mbombo. You’ll need broad shoulders for that position and the moniker.

Steve Naive

A Don Howe disciple explains the route to goal.
It should be – Me ( go H2)… an elementary mistake
common in the early classes.
Furthermore, I have a book on great Belgians and Dedryk isn’t in it.




Caption : Having been drawn to visit Ibrox in the EL qualifiers, St Josephs of Gibralter fans are issued with instructions on how to manufacture their own ‘Stab Vest’


Now class if you can solve this you’ll never get a job working with the SFA


Caption: Gerrard’s new disciplinary system implemented even in the tactics sessions

Mike A

Caption: In preparation for their Orange Walks, walkers are shown the formulae on how to win friends and influence people.


Welcome to Celtic Bolingoli-Mbombo. You’ll need broad shoulders to fill the position and get your moniker on the jersey.

Dennis Doherty

Caption.After the divorce Lorena Bobbett took up teaching.

Dennis… That’s the unkindest cut of all

Caption….right wee huns u better learn this cos auld huns never knew maths n our big house team died sa get it right or yer gettin tanned


Gary Rowat’s Derby. versus Frank Lamperd’s… more goals scored, less conceded, higher placed finish in the league… Lampard to Chelsea !!!

Big Shuggy


I see the club formerly known as rangers have 4 friendlies in july.

None of the games are on the season ticket. The Glib one is obviously desperate for money.At £15 a head he’s fleecing the hordes again.


Thanks for your kind comment yesterday Iancelt I do submit some crap captions occasionally to give Charlie Saiz a wee sniff, here’s one.

Caption: As Miss Brown describes the chemical formula of a Mars Bar the pupils begin to suspect that the painters are in.



You’ve got a pen, I’ve got a knife son!



No Sheldon it’s not wrong , and if you say that again your getting chibbed…



…….and if any of you fuckers wear that new Celtic third strip, I’ll chib you.

caption,Now children,if we are on a club 1872 day out and we see any tims,and we stab 3 of them 5 times and chib 4 of them 6 times ,how many of us get arrested?
wee Billy ,none miss
teacher,correct ,isn,t scotland great

Reds win 4 0… In Europa league… Next please
HAIL HAIL my Reds. Some great individual performances

The Cha

Excellent stuff.

Bring on the Huns.


Caption: Reanactment of Larkhall teacher stabbing f*ck out of green-tinged blackboard


Wee song for Tuesday night’s Sevco game against St Josephs

When the death shades round us gather,
teach, O teach us how to die, teach,
O teach us how to die.

CHA.. We meet Haugesund of Norway in 1st round preliminary


Good luck comrade!

The Cha

Steady now, you’ve won the preliminary round and are now in the 1st round of Qualifying.

It’s difficult enough without wanting to do it all again!

Cha6… Ya wouldn’t be one of those hair splitters? Ffs


am as big a tim as any cuoont but if sumdy offers me triple ma wages ..am gon so ff keiran or callum want tae shift a wish thum well and any person who disnae is a coont


Life isn’t about money, there is more to life than that m8.
Memories, pride, never betray your colours.

It saddens me that life is dominated by material things.

Rob O'Keeffe

M,I’ve been skint and loaded….guess which situation proved more appealing…..look at John Kennedy’s situation….nobody gives him credit and he’s seen by many as a charity case….


a know wit yer saying monti but the wee man could get fookin cripled up heer and the specsavers loyal would dae nuthin tae protect um so if he leaves we should wishum well COYBIG


notice a used a double o instead ae a u ts because who ever the bhoys let moderate is a person whose a hoon ……excuse ma french but if ye canny instantly make othertims laugh well the gemmes a bogey so whoever they spam guys ur get thum tae fook


Doubles are no use to us, we only deal with trebles on here.


he he monti aint life grand


Can someone have a word with New Balance, please.
This is beyond belief now.

I mean, are they serious?

Monti… I don’t know… but I’d reckon that you’d look rather fetching in the 3rd kit tap 🙂

The Cha

Positively dazzle under the disco lights.

Monti.. Come on… Strike the pose…


You pair of wallopers 🙂

Rob O'Keeffe

In the “battle” for supremacy…For every bloo pen you buy,we’ll buy one of these!….Signed Una…
P.S.Without being sexist,unlike the two main ones on here,I think the new third top will sell well amongst our lovely fhemale supporters….

P.P.S. Congratulations to Peter and Dermot on splashing the cash,all the comments from the Huns at work about biscuit tins seem to be drying up…hhappy dhays….


Caption: In this code is the name and address of a New Balance strip designer. Find him and keel heem!


see if ye take oot the et and add a arse akismet is an anagram ae kis ma arse he he


Great wee St Joseph’s song for the Sevco game…
When the death shades round us gather,
teach, O teach us how to die, teach,
O teach us how to die.


Caption “Quadruple my arse!”



“Quadruple my arse!”


A true champion of the club has retired today.
John Keane paid the million pounds required to the bank of Scotland to keep our club from going into administration. Without care for his money he stepped upto the mark to help Fergus gain time to takeover. He was our honorary chairman but forever should be remembered as the man who put our club first we shall forever be in your debt John.
Celtic first Celtic Last Celtic overall.
Enjoy your retirement.


Well said!


John Keane, the Mayo bhoy, answered the late night telephone call from the Celtic chairman, Kevin Kelly, asking for his immediate help, the news was catastrophic. Masterton (spit) at the BOS was going to foreclose at the club we all hold dear. Administration, that dreaded word was inevitable unless an immediate £1 mill. pounds was found, now, today. All our proud history was under threat. The story tells that the very next morning John Keane waiting at the door of the BOS, after calling his friend at the Bank of Ireland to transfer the funds. John Keane the modest Mayo… Read more »


Well said!


Caption: If you cut out the taxes here, you’ll end up deid!


Caption: Laura Fawkes shows Club 1872 subscribers how a 10% shareholding turned into a 6% one, “Just like that. No questions?. No surrender!”


Some of these names being linked to Celtic, is completely underwhelming.

I’m not saying i’m getting frustrated or that tho….

You mad about ETims or just plain mad? Why not buy the t-shirt at http://etims.spreadshirt.co.uk/