Celtic Diary Monday April 15: Beautiful Sunday

Well, I enjoyed it.

From the first hoof up the park it was clear that tippy tappy had been binned, which came as a massive shock to the Aberdeen players , and when Jozo Simunovic ran straight into their parked bus and forced a save from their keeper it meant that it was just a matter of how many.

So much so, in fact , that Derek McInnes , his assistant, and two Dons players went for an early bath, several months before they’d planned one.

McInnes ? He might not want the Ibrox job, but he’s certainly created a home from home up there under the northern lights.

The assault on Ryan Christie, which initially looked like a clash of heads, when viewed in slow motion, is enough to get someone jail time. Watch how the Aberdeen player tenses and aims…the neck muscles were reminiscent of a Jimmy McGrory header.

McInnes was sent off. He later claimed it was due to his reaction to a chorus of “Sad Orange Bastard “, which actually started after he’d been sent off.

I guess he just got confused.

Surely it was his own fans ?

Home from home…

Serial loser McInnes lost again. He should be used to it by now.

But, in the interests of balance, lets hear his side of the story..

Derek McInnes;

Dom Ball – ‘I need to remind people about when Boyata took Gary Mackay-Steven right out.’

Sectarian singing – ‘It’ll be interesting to see if everyone gets punished for the incident.’

It’s  deflection from how his team played, which included a tackle by Lewis ” Uncle Barry, get me a job ” Ferguson that was pretty much a come and get me to “rangers ” , is , er, just what the other teams do when they’ve had their arses smacked…

He’s made an arse of it again, and now surely the Aberdeen board will notice that he’s won the square root of fuck all, and done so with great dignity…


Here’s to eight in a row, and nine consecutive trophies.

These are better days…

Europe can wait. I’m enjoying their pain too much.

Image result for riverdance gif

BBC Scotland, currently undergoing a revamp to take its head out of the arse of it’s London bosses, employs a Jonathan Sutherland to promote Scottish football..

Yet more moronic sectarian singing in Scottish football, this time from Celtic fans aimed at Derek McInnes. An issue Scottish football seems unable to solve. 

Another issue that the game seems unable to solve is how a seven year old club is going for a 55th title.

Or how fans of one club were led to believe that another club was the same one, to the tune of millions of pounds of their money.

As much as I don’t like them and their attitude to cultural diversity, one feels an obligation towards those not capable of rational thought or behaviour, and it surprises me that they don’t seem to welcome that help..

Anyway, it’s the sort of sort of scandal you’d think a state owned and paid for broadcaster would feel obliged to investigate.

Image result for bbc scotland

Mr Sutherland, until you remove your head from the arse of your producer, you have no credibility whatsoever.

So, stop talking and stop thinking until you learn how to use your eyes, (2), your ears (2) and your mouth (1) in proportion.

Meanwhile, James Forrest scored a belter, showing why he is a Celtic legend.

In the making. Although he’s done pretty well so far..

Oddsone Edouard scored a penalty, itself a rarity these days, and Tom Rogic did what he does.

Which impressed the ladies.

Well, one of them…

She tweeted…

Wouldn’t say no to that! 😜

John C, also on twitter, was a little more practical..

‘I don’t think I could manage another 68 of those, Deirdre.’


Dragging the Diary out of the gutter, we move on…

Celtic are now in a Cup final, and let’s face it, more or less certain to win the league.

We’ve every right to feel a little bit better this morning.

I certainly do.

Lennon changed things about a bit.

The players responded.

James Forrest, a player we take for granted, stepped up and led the charge.

James Forrest for Player of the Year, no doubt about it, big game player, big game goals, big game assists, single handedly dragged Scotland into a Euro2020 Play-Off too, the only midfielder in Europe to score and assist 20+ goals in each catagory for club and country. 

Seriously, this guy is a legend in the making.

Right up there with McGrain, Burns, McStay  and McNeill.

Well, he will be in a couple of years time.

We talk about Brown, and rightly so, but we have another player who never wanted to play anywhere else, and who wins crucial games for us.

Forrest is genuinely one of us, with a pair of boots and an idea how to use them correctly.

Those of us who were fortunate enough to see other legends may be a little blaise about one who is among us.

And I don’t say that lightly.

Image result for james forrest celtic

There’s a Starman, playing on the right..

His name is Jamesy Forrest and you know he’s dynamite..

Alright, David Bowie wrote the music, but I claim the lyrics…and Bowie would tell you himself he was shite at lyrics.

If he wasn’t dead.


Elswhere, and it appears the Celtic Trust are sulking because they , too, had a case concerning Resolution 12.

In the interests of diplomacy, I offered to host a charity five a side game, but when they turned up everyone was wearing hoops, and as it was their ball, they refused to let us have it.

Fucks sake.

Grow up.

We’re in this together, it’s not about who leads us into battle, it’s about the result.

And if Peter finds out we’re divided, he’ll do that thing where he promises to look after you.

Didn’t work with me, and it shouldn’t work with anyone else.

Stephen McGowan at the Mail, however…now there’s a man who knows all about..

Image result for supermarionation

There are Celtic supporters, there are Celtic shareholders, and there is Celtic PLC.

The first two are you and I.

The latter is the one’s who treat us in the same way Charles Green treated the gullibillies.

It’s heading towards High Noon.

And their dinner is out.

I’ve been talking to a tax fellow, and he says he can show me how warnings were ignored about the former Rangers long before they went tits up.

When the information is collated, it will be further proof that the SFA are not fit for purpose, and if we have to take Res 12 to the City of London police, then we will.

And see that Line of Duty programme, it will look like a documentary featuring Police Scotland when all this is over…



Persistence will beat resistance.

With a big stick.

And then claim it fell down the stairs.

Right . I’m off to Peterborough.


Image result for peterborough cathedral

In this picture the homeless guys were moved out of the way.

I did find an Irish bar in a little place outside of town.

I had to hold my chin up as the owner informed me how the English could not possibly be blamed for the bad weather that caused the famine.

I never went back.

By the way, if you have Netflix, you might want to catch Black 47.


Picture from yesterday..


Charlie Saiz April 14, 2019 at 12:45 pm · Edit · Reply →

“And in the Green corner weighing in at 17 Stones from Bologna ” Monti limbers up in his Montildo Works boiler suit prior to Battle of the Etim Fandans in the Gallowgate.

Guys…chill…it was a beautiful sunday..







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D'Finnhein Mick


‘I’m not a happy man today. Too much green and white on the wall. What’s that,Specsavers now do hearing tests?’


Why do the Celts keep on winning,
why do they keep on scoring goals,
don’t they know its the end of the world,
it ended in February twenty twelve.

Why do the Celts keep on singing,
singing with such happiness and joy,
don’t they know that were not supposed to win,
why could they not just take it on the chin.
Fine bhoys yeh are… chocolate oranges, hehehe.

Mike A

Caption: Yes he’s still a startlingly weight challenged shade of marmalade with no discernible father.


Its about time you were on the phone, London calling…


Caption: Who put that green cord there? This is a sectarian press conference, I’m off.

Brilliant result. On our way to the 3treble.

Arsene Parcelie

Caption: “Well, The HTC U12+ has an amazing photography setup with four cameras, and the OnePlus 6T is a noteworthy device not only because it costs hundreds of dollars less than other flagship smartphones, but also thanks to its impressive performance specs and innovative in-display fingerprint sensor and the Google Pixel 3 is an intuitive device with unique, easy-to-use features and those make it the best Android device on the market. Everything about the Samsung Galaxy Note 9 is large, from its display to its battery to its memory and storage options making it a perfect device for phablet fans.… Read more »


caption ” but Stevie Clarke……..” Was I right that the sheep gave Ryan Christie pelters for being the victim of a serious assault or was it aimed at Thompson? Didn’t see the ball boy incident so look forward to getting that sorted. Who briefs or supervises these wee boys at Hampden? Enjoying baiting the James Forrest boo bhoys ( you know who you are), an unbelievable talent.


Caption Dead man talking .

Yoker Bhoy


“Have a heart. Please go easy on me with the sanction. I’m only a poor, sad and lonely orange bastard.”



Sad Orange bastard


Caption: I’m off for drink with Tic Toc and Buzz Bomb that will cheer me up




CBEEBIES finished then? tinky winky ^




I see the meds still haven’t kicked in tosses.


Had a regard for Dons for over 50 years, but I’m sorry to say they have turned into thugs. If you can’t play the game get to fuck and take sevco with you.!,,Play the game!


Ma team were pure dead brilliant, it’s no fair the big boys cheated.

Sad horrible wee guy that sent his team out to stick it to Celtic, now all they can do is whine it was not fair.
Balls challenge was a deliberate attempt to do Christie, Cosgrove fouled and dived during the game, as for Ferguson a stupid duck in the making, Bazza will be proud.

Oh how the gnashing of teeth from the zombies is such a pleasure to listen to this morning, demanding foreign referees to stop the bias towards them


“I’ll have you know I’m naked from the waist down”

Rob O'Keeffe

Caption: See that bottle? I predict it’ll crash in a very similar way to mine and my “teams” when the Bhoys are around…..




I was there, you weren’t….so who shat it, Billy boy?


Caption: “Derek, it’s going to be 10 in a row, isn’t it”?

Rob O'Keeffe

Speaking of Real Legends: On the tee-Tiger Woods! Fcuking Awesome!…..these days are days to be savoured by those of us of a more mature vintage as they are not likely to be repeated in the future….
P.S.J.Hayes,I owe you an apology and it’ll be face to face or rather,face to chest….


Caption: Derek is forced to read a CQN thread

Rob O'Keeffe

HMRC going after Huns who refused to agree deals to pay back taxes due.Thanks Ghod! I’ve had to take day off,I’ve a feeling that some of my comments would result in a straight Red……
P.S.Question:How many fouls is a player allowed to commit without getting a yellow card?…..Signed Bawwy,EBT,kid on bankrupt,here’s the house hen,is that the Sheriff officers coming up my non-heateddriveway? FergieHun.
A straight Red for trying to cripple a Tim? What sort of referees are these guys?…

Caption. ” It was the truth that hurt the most”

Bombast… Your input has been noted and ignored


Why don’t you want to discuss why you are a thick cunt?


The narrative of the Scottish press has been adjusted, adjusted to paint Celtic as a sectarian club. There is no “Old-Firm” but the linkage remains. By portraying Celtic as a sectarian club, there aim is to show us as “one glove of the pair”. Is Orangiesm a religion? founded as a Masonic styled fraternity, it is sworn to maintain the Protestant Ascendancy, that is the reason why they march down the cities and towns of Scotland and the north of Ireland. The so called journalists, well lets be honest they are usually ex pro footballers who write a column, to… Read more »




Start with you then!



All red carded in the past couple of weeks, playing against Celtic..


Fud alert^


I enjoy every night!

To take stalk one must first take stock




one can only assume you are a 25 stone cage fighter if you have taken a look at monti and fancy your chances

obviously I can take him but….

Fr. McGreer

Hello darkness my old friend

(Caption) Now who can i blame now broony has had it for over a week so that’s him out awe feck it its the supporters fault and im sure that ball bhoy was to blame as well HH


CAPTION….Am no kidding ah toldt Ball to watch the assault on K.T. in last year’s final and copy it.


Caption:”Deek, you gave been paired with buzz bomb on strictly come dancing”

Honest hoops

Caption; I canny lie to myself anymore…they are indeed “a grand old team to play for” ….


Oh well that was funny…nnnnnnnnntttttt 🙂


Feeding time at the zoo has started again, like two pussy’s clinging on to one another getting ready for their first fuck.
Treat me tender, love me do, I love me and you love you.
Get a room and GIRUY.


You leave my friend out of it, he’s a fine fella, while you lot are just pure ragin with jealousy. 😉 0


Its one of life’s small pleasures.


Its NOT that small..


Your not getting any pics if that’s what your after…


All my sheep are happy and contented, no complaints from them, they know when they are onto a good thing.. in every relationship online or off, there has to be some give and take… its in my nature to give…


No chance, my brother is bigger than your brother…


Monti isn’t what you think he is and he definitely isn’t what you say he is…..


That’s for me to know and you to find out…

Yoker Bhoy

CS, what the fuck are you on about??


He’s just talking pish mate, its what he does…

Yoker Bhoy

Aw Mikey, I know he was. I just wanted to test his reaction but you’ve gone and spoiled it 🙂


hehehe shorry. 😉

Yoker Bhoy

Ha ha, a bit like your good self with your fellow Brexiteer Farage. You and big Nige would make a lovely couple.

The Cha

Deary me, having a pop at the Celtic Trust.

That’ll do wonders for fan unity.



The Celtic Trust have been kept in the general picture on Resolution 12 but during its lifetime have had other stronger priorities like FAC and repeal of the daft OBAF Act to address. The situation now however is that the Res12 Archive demonstrates beyond doubt what can happen when football is not accountable to its supporters. It shows a total disregard for fairness and a willingness to lie safe in the knowledge that it is acceptable to do so. (Sounds like bloody Brexit) Had supporters/shareholders been involved in the construction of the 5 Way Agreement would some of its integrity/justice… Read more »

The Cha

The OBAF may be dead but it looks likely that the authorities are gearing up for further attacks on fans, that’s likely to consume a lot of CT & FAC time.

Although not directly a Celtic issue, a lot of individuals time is also taken up with the Call It Out and other important initiatives.

As a matter of interest, why was Res12 not progressed through the CT in the first place, as that would’ve been the logical route given their experience in this area and obviously they represent Celtic supporters as shareholders?


The Cha Why didn’t CST pursue in first place? Resources. They advised on how to get a resolution on the agenda but back in 2013 they had other priorities and no one knew back then where the resolution would lead. In the intervening years layer by layer the facts and understanding of both tax law and UEFA FFP grew and the requisitioners had some experience or knew where to get advice on interpretation. There was little point until May last year involving CST or CSA when evidence that false proof had been used to obtain the UEFA licence emerged. There… Read more »


Best by miles, and more succinct too, than anything of yours I’ve ever come across, Auldheid.

If there’s a channel towards exposing the truth, I’d happily contribute, my (few) shares, a small monthly financial contribution, some time doing research, et cetera. You guys have been terrific up till now but NEED wider support (without wider vocal influence).

I’m a bit ‘nuts’ at times, but I’ll help in any way I can. For me, it’s ALL about exposing the TRUTH and the co-conspiritors, regardless of their own stated ‘affilliations’, and getting them humiliated and removed, ONCE AND FOR ALL.
HH Celtic FC

Cheer up bonnie Scotland,oh what does it mean?For the cap doffing royalists and their love of the German queen,

Buzz bomb, did you used to post on the Celtic blog under the name the green machine by any chance?


I know a piece of tail…..well used tho…

That would be latex… Doh

Boak bomb… The really interesting thing is that you didn’t know that fact… You got a rubber thing going there…


TWG, I was wondering when someone else would clock that one. His aggressive stance against any and all comers,(you and me are next for being mentioned in dispatches), his total ignorance of basic bookkeeping, as taught in Secondary School, about the only subject he has not yet turned his awesome intelligence to( All the product of nurturing by a cadre of like minded benevolent peers and family. Plus his enormous drive for self development). I suppose we should feel privileged that he finds the time to to share his insights with us on etims. What with exposing all the conspiracy… Read more »


TWG, I was wondering when someone else would clock that one. His aggressive stance against any and all comers,(you and me are next for being mentioned in dispatches), his total ignorance of basic bookkeeping, as taught in Secondary School, about the only subject he has not yet turned his awesome intelligence to( All the product of nurturing by a cadre of like minded benevolent peers and family. Plus his enormous drive for self development). I suppose we should feel privileged that he finds the time to to share his insights with us on etims. What with exposing all the conspiracy… Read more »


TWG, I was wondering when someone else would clock that one. His aggressive stance against any and all comers,(you and me are next for being mentioned in dispatches), his total ignorance of basic bookkeeping, as taught in Secondary School, about the only subject he has not yet turned his awesome intelligence to( All the product of nurturing by a cadre of like minded benevolent peers and family. Plus his enormous drive for self development). I suppose we should feel privileged that he finds the time to to share his insights with us on etims. What with exposing all the conspiracy… Read more »


Buzz bomb,
If you see me yesterday why did you do nothing about it?
Shat it?

You were nowhere near the bar yesterday because you are just a wee fuckwit hun internet warrior on a keyboard.
I’ve told you before, put up or shut the fuck up.

Why did you not come over & say ” Mont, i’m Buzz, do you want a pint ”

Because you shat it that’s why.

Best be keeping your head down lad.

Monti… Mind yer blood pressure & dinnae worry about this one… He lives on fantasy island along with the rest of the boys from Brazil… It in the DNA


Do you think he’s Tattoo?

” hey boss it’s a plane ” 🙂

Brazil bomb… I’m not from Brazil but Brazil nuts are…

A great movie tho




Mwaaahaa somebody else found you out Monti he he he


Oh fuck look what the cat dragged in….it’s Bob the knob from Video Celts.lol
Ladies & Gentlemen…let me introduce to you ‘ Bob ‘ the resident sevconian.

Stupid, stupid man.

Philby bomb… Now you’re military intelligence on reconnaissance, reconnoitering things to be reconnoitered…
Is there no end to your intelligence orifficier

Sic… orifficier

Balls bomb… Time for your lithium I think

My name is Derek and i`m a bastard.



Thon kebab on the floor has given me a semi

Una… Could you soften that for him


Maybe u could take a bite of it

Una…I’ve never eaten a kebab before




Massive own goal by the club it seems.
After last year’s historic back to back treble and the jubilant scenes along the Celtic way.
Celtic have rented out Celtic park to the rugby on 25th May.
So there will be little chance of the fans celebrating at paradise come cup final day this season. Stupid or what ?

The Cha

C’mon the biscuit tin doesn’t stuff itself. ;(

There’s usually a charity game the day after the Cup Final but I’ve not seen any details.

Perhaps they can combine the 2 and give Monti a chance to say farewell to Dedryck and wish him all the best for the future.


I think most people in general know more than you, because you are a little light in the brain dept.
Talking of brains, where’s TicToc? 🙂


Well done Lenny and the bhoys yesterday.
I thought big jozo was terrific and haddled the big guys well. Jamesy great goal as was big toms,and French eddy calm as you like.
The whole team played their part and took some terrible challenges.
It looks like the huns in management are as hell bent on getting our players injured as the players. For McInnes to say it wasn’t an ordering off on Christie is scandalous.


Also a fan of Jozo’s performance yesterday and most time its just his fitness that gives us selection problems and i dont mean just the plastic pitch issue we can cope with the odd game. Interestingly Ross county beyond the Arctic circle will likely be back in the top league nest season with a grass pitch. Mike Celtic are not in any way a sectarian club and only a tiny number of our fans use the orange abuse word, see above. The thing is we don’t need to do any of it.Our songs,Athenry,Willie Maley,Grace,a “Grand Old Team” are miles ahead… Read more »


BJF, We both know that Celtic isn’t a sectarian club, that is what the media want everyone to think we are, as you say its there pathetic attempt to try to even things out. But we both know who the real bigots are and they are not all found in just the one club. There was some disgusting chants heard from the Aberdeen supporters. Our support may not all be perfect, but they are a million miles better than all the others put together…


My grandkids will be Celtic fans

Bobby Murdoch’s Crumpled Up Chip Wrapper

Why do so many guys think it’s cool to look like Peter Sutcliffe?

Anyway staying close to that topic for the Caption……

“I’m Jack. I see you are still having no luck catching me. I have the greatest respect for you, George, but Lord, you are no nearer to catching me now than four years ago when I started. I reckon your boys are letting you down, George. Ya can’t be much good, can ya?”


90 comments out of 118 from the Diary’s two resident penis transplant donors as they yet again discuss who is the harder hardman…


Leave Charlie Saiz out of this please….


Buzzing device,
Have you seen the programme ‘ Rainbow ‘?


Oh dear!


No, buzz baws, I don’t mind at all….ask away.
Oh, and you will let me know when this ‘debate’ starts, won’t you?


Caption: Bereft of any tactics, McInnes resorts to stealing phones from the Celtic changing room.


We could have an ETims Diary university challenge.

Charlie Saiz, TicToc, Bob, Buzz Bomb would be from the ‘ Scottish elite University for general fuckwittery ‘ Buzz bomb is the captain of the team.

Una, you can come as the studio cleaner.


When i briefly think of Charlie Saiz, Tic(all) Toc & Buzz squid, i can’t help but think of the 80’s children show ‘ Rainbow ‘.

Charlie Saiz would be Zippy as he can’t shut the fuck up.
Tic Toc would be George as he is pink & gentle,

That leaves us with 🙂 Bungle, Buzz bomb is Bungle the teady bear, because he is big, brave & erm a bear.

Bungle 🙂

Charlie Saiz

You could be Rod Jane and Freddie with the multiple personalities you have Montildo Up above the streets and houses Charlie’s in his loft Monti s on his XBox again wanking over Lara Croft Mike is in the barn with Yoker playing hide and seek Weereds crushing fertiliser has been for a week Paint the whole site with a tar brush…. Well Ralph has been hiding in deepest Peterborough Buzz Bombs on a Recce cause you upset his mother Tic Tocs dropping jellies mixed with Smirnoff Ice Bob just bobs in noo and then tae give Monti some advice Paint… Read more »

C S… I enjoyed that… Very good. Would ye have half a ton of sugar I could borrow 😉

C S… Oops also 2 25’s of diesel


” Oh Geoffrey, can we long on to Etims please? Please? Please “?

Certainly Bungle 🙂


Come again? Oops sorry i was thinking of your…ach well you know who 🙂


Yes i do, fire away!


…and yes, certain!

Charlie Saiz

That’s hun patter BB better leave that to those with zero moral standards.
Rise above it and keep it within the realms of humour.
Trust me just because folk are saying nothing doesn’t mean they aren’t thinking something.


Could someone put up a clip of Bungle in ‘ Rainbow ‘ please.


The latter 🙂


I think i’m starting to like Buzz Bomb 🙂


So you know him too Buzz Bomb.comedy gold m8 keep it up.I have been saying for a long time that minto is a bully and that it is all about him Well done pal give him a taste of his own medicine.


Are you intimating that there is something wrong in someone being gay?
Oh dear.


I’m not


Caption: I’m So Ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone
There’s no one
Just me onry
Sitting on my rittle throne
I work rearry hard and make up great prans
But nobody ristens, no one understands
Seems like no one takes me serirousry
And so I’m ronery
A rittle ronery
Poor rittle me
There’s nobody
I can rerate to
Feel rike a bird in a cage
It’s kinda sihry
But not rearry
Because it’s fihring my body with rage
I’m the smartest most crever most physicarry fit
But nobody else seems to rearize it
When I change the world maybe they’ll notice me
But until then I’rr just be ronery
Rittle ronery, poor rittle me
I’m so ronery


Fuckin knew it…


Flagellation good times, come on, lets self flagellate,
There’s a party going on tonight, come on, were gonny self flagellate..



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