Celtic Diary Tuesday January 2: Happy New Year !

Whatever it is that you want in 2019, I hope you get it. That goes for everyone, even those people at the SFA, those in the media, and those who follow at team at Ibrox.

Sort of.

I hope they get what they deserve.

That the cheerful bit out of the way.

The transfer window was open all day yesterday, and not one single new signing has been announced, pointing to a lackadaisical lollygagging yet again in the scouting and recruitment department.

Although there are whispers that anderlecht are looking to recruit our recruitment chief, Lee Congerton. Presumably they think he’s the brains behind the profit Celtic have made on players over the last few years, and if they are reading this, he is, and we really don’t want to lose him.

But the word is he has always wanted to live in Belguim, enjoys a pint of Stella Artois and is partial to Poirot, so a reasonable offer might tempt him away.

If they are short of funds, we can set up a GoFund Me appeal, to help Get Him To Fund.

Congertons influence has been dimished of late, one indication of that is that all the players recruited last January appear to be on their way out this January. Those that haven’t already gone that is.

Jack Hendry is earmarked for a loan deal to kickstart his development after a horrendous start to his Celtic career where he got the blame for everything from defensive lapses to cold pies despite never hiding from whatever was thrown at him. It’ll do him good.

Charley Musonda didn’t even last twelve months and Marvin Comperr will have his contract terminated. Celtic aren’t worried about a possible legal battle for compensation as most court building have lots of stairs leading up to the entrance, and Comperr will never make it to the top. Even if he does he won’t be able to take the stand without straining something.

So this time its been the responsibility of Kolo Toure to dig out a couple of faces.

We told you that two deals had already been more or less agreed, and on the evidence in the media-oh wait.

Timothy Weah looks likely to put pen to paper on a six month loan deal. Which means that by the time he adapts to the rough and tumble of Scottish football, he’ll be away again, leaving Leigh Griffiths as our go to striker for the qualifiers, and then theres Vakun Issouf Bayo of Dunajska Streda.

Hey calm down there. We’re talking about The Vakun Issouf Bayo. So highly rated by Celtic that they have bid almost as much as Peter Lawwell picked up as his New Year bonus. ( £1.75m as compared to £2.3m )

Fuck me, push that boat out any further and we’ll never get it back.

Other clubs are interested , and it can be taken as read that his club will hold out for as much as they can get.

He is highly rated , and definately one for the future, which means hes not likely to walk into the first team. but at least he can walk, which would be an improvement on the Comperr signing.

We said two deals, and clearly Bayo isn’t one of them, so it looks like the club are quietly sorting out the other whilst deflecting attention elsewhere.

As long as its not Olly Burke. One thign we aren’t short of is wingers. Especially shite wingers.


There could be a bit of an exodus from Celtic this winter, but the difficulty is finding clubs willing to take our surplus off our hands, and more importantly, willing to pay them what they are already earning.

Its going to be a long month.

Especially if there’s anything in the Teemu Pukki rumours.


One thing you won;t read much about is the attack on the Celtic team bus prior to the Ibrox match, which may or may not have been a factor in the teams performance. It would certainly have shaken the players up, and although no action is imminent, it may lead to a new ruling..

 Alfredo Morelas, who showed his true colours on Saturday, may yet be banned for one or two of his antics on the field. Which one-or ones-is largely at the whim of the SFA Compliance Officer.

Oh, perhaps I shouldn’t have used the word “colours “..

The Rangers Observer twitter account, apparently run by that likeable young scamp Chris Graham, has spotted something no one else has. Probably because no one else felt it was worth looking for, as it doesn’t exist.

The campaign against Morelos is fairly stepping up today. You have to wonder if any journalists taking part have the self awareness to see what a bad look it is to constantly pick on the young, black South American whilst ignoring the behaviour of senior, white, Scottish players. 

Morelas, by the way, seems to me to be of Hispanic descent, which is an entirely different ethnicity.

One wonders what the agenda is here, as it seems odd that a club who live in a glass house should start throwing stones..

Clearly the Rangers Observer is quite selective in what he observes, but the whole issue may simply to be to claim that Morelas, who has made no secret of the fact he wants to leave, can now be said to have left due to racist abuse from opposition fans, which will make a nice change from a “rangers ” player leaving due to racist abuse from their own..

Or to deflect from this…

This of course, refers to the recent trial and conviction of James Torbett, for offences committed in the nineties. Stein, of course, passed away long before then. Which would have made that phone call somewhat tricky.

Some Celtic supporters have demanded that our club react to and condemn banners such as this and the accompanying chants, but I’m fairly sure I recall the family of the great man telling our board they didn’t want to offer them the oxygen they crave.

Anyway, its a new year and we have a lot to look forward to.

We’re still at the top of the league, we’re still in europe and we still have the Scottish Cup, not only as a trophy but as a vehicle to draw attention to the simple fact that the playing field in our game is starting to tilt towards one club, like it used to in the old days.

Alright, its a different club, but the flies surrounding that particular effluence are still the same.

January 20…keep your eyes open on that day. And keep your eyes open for a company called Windy City. They may well turn out to be significant.

These next few months are going to be as difficult as any we have ever experienced, and it will take a monumental effort to keep ourselves on track for ten in a row.

We need to get everything right. On the field, off the field and in the media.

Who’s up for it ?


Caption competition goes back to Saturday

Image result for brendan rodgers steven gerrard

Iancelt67 December 29, 2018 at 11:31 am · Edit · Reply →

It’s ok mate the referee’s a hun 

Which reminds me, we hear that John Beaton was in the Crown Bar in Bellshill, telling his like minded drinking chums that he “was never going to give them anything “…

What can it mean ? If only there was an audio recording available…

Todays picture , which demands your perusal…

By the way, did anyone watch Pointless the other day ?

The question was about Londons Police commisioner..the contestant had to identify him/her and had the initials CD as a clue..

Did he really say Caressa Dick ?

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Caption “ The sheep may be on to something after all.”
Sadly never heard of Vakun Issouf Bayo or Dunajesta Streda, maybe we should sign them both! We do not need any more wide players, what we need is a ready to roll centre half, if we lose Boyata, a competent hold the ball up striker and a midfielder with goals on him( or I should probably say her) just to keep the pc police content. I see the defence for that wee thug Morelos has also started early.


Caption. So I says to the boss you can stick that traffic cone up yer arse, ooooow!

D'Fhinnein Mick

Excellent article,Ralph. And a HAPPY HOOOOOPY NEW YEAR to you,yours,and all your readers.

I’m not gonna offer a caption comment,I just think it’s a well-weird photo! And as for watching Pointless,I think we all did that on Saturday.


Celtic will regroup get our bhoys back up to speed and lets see come May where the cups and titles are. If we win it by 1 point or 10 it won’t matter.
Fuck the hun bastards.



New conenoscopy device testing…


Caption : Coney no dae that.


Let me be the first to wish you all a Braw, Braw New Year, may your only problems be cleaning up the dog shite from the floor and thank you all for providing this knocking shop, oops talking shop of Celtic information, wit and ideas, the Mrs. Dale’s Diary, a brilliant way to start your day. We talk so much about what kind of leadership that is provided by the custodians of our great club, or perhaps the lack of leadership, this lack of information is one thing, but they must provide a duty of care for the support, the… Read more »


Ref Windy City, Said all along HK money holding this shitpit “up”.

Am sure it’s funding slippy g and his gang.


Yep Peter there is very definitely some nefarious goings on round this HK connection- Barry Scott seems to be the middle man. DK himself is also in there somewhere I think. SARS are keeping tabs on him so he needs to find some other way to get these ‘brown paper bags of used notes’ #cough into the Ibrokes coffers. Defo Slippy G and entourage being paid in a, shall we say, unorthodox fashion!


Noo mind lads when the doctors ask a slipped from the top of a very tall ladder and somehow landed awkwardly on the traffic cone yees can split ma weeks wages if ye back up ma story

Mike Annis

Caption: Head of referees manages to plug gap where he head usually resides.


Clare Whyte has a Hannah’s shredder skip full of complaints facing her when she returns tomorrow from her holiday break. She must be wondering what she took on as the SFA’s Compliance Officer. Tony McGlennan might have set up the so called policing of the Scottish football Association, but she has much to enforce judging by the antics of the wee prick Morelos, if he gets away with four definite cards, even if they are yellow, a hefty ban should follow, follow. But as a former Crown Office Procurator she should be well versed in thuggery and how to handle… Read more »


Fancy a game of two man hunt ?


Caption: look, if it keeps me safe from that Morelos animal’s hands and feet….


“And for my next trick I’m going to make Martin commper disappear”


Caption: I knew Beaton was a Hun tit efter I saw him wi’ thon silly cone injection.

50 Shades of Green

“Whatever it is that you want in 2019, I hope you get it. That goes for everyone, even those people at the SFA, those in the media, and those who follow at team at Ibrox.”

Isn’t that 3 cheeks of the same arse Ralph??

Caption, I telt ye if you drapped wan again I would stick a bloody plug in it.


Strict liability regulations drafted by the stalwart Rod McKenzie? WTF was Hannan smoking when he wrote that shite?

50 Shades of Green

Or Caption……

Councils new distribution scheme for traffic cones stinks according to some…….


caption the guy sais a might look daft but ralph disnae know wit day it is


ralph hiv you been oan the swally


Its the Hokey Cokey Dance, You get one player in and three players out, you do the Hokey Cokey and another turn about. How much money is wasted in the dross that goes through the gates at Lenoxtown, millions I would guess. Players come in who have cost from £1mill. to £1,5 mill. get a wage for 12 months and then are shown the door, you would need ten fingers to count them. Football isn’t an exact science but surely we should be doing better than what is happening now. Well most bigger clubs have a DOF. So perhaps its… Read more »

The maggot parasites that take millions while watching the Huns and SFA continually cheat Celtic should be chased for their lives!Organised shambles by the Tory’s that run us just coincidence?How to fuck up a successful team and still make millions . Only in jockville


Caption: hey gaffer where does this go?

The Cha

Caption “Timmy proves he’d rather stick a hazard cone up his arse than watch a rerun of Saturday’s game”.

Odd comment about Grif being our only fit striker for the qualifiers; are you expecting Eddy to be off at the end of the season?

That would be a very big mistake, in an area where we need continuity and stability.

Tuesday? Checking who’s paying attention.


Its a re-run of the chipmunks, only the cones have been changed to protect the innocent..


“There goes my baby, she’s driving me crazy” a truism if ever there was one. Hey baby, leave my nuts alone..


Caption Some sense a humour yer doctors got efter going to see him about yer itchy piles an how ye cany stop scratching them.


Caption: So ah asked her fur a 69 an she thought I said 99. Does anybody know how to get chocolate stains oot a duvet?


Give them to Una, she will boil wash, dry them & finally steam iron them.

Hey presto….

Qui Gon Jim


Traffic cone gets lodged in council gritter!

Magdalena’s Chestnut Geldings Saddle Strap


Ally McCoist’s (he’s on the right of picture) Garden Leave team model the sex toys from their new merchandise range.
XXXXXL Butt Plug as modelled by Durranty.


That’s the second wan o them a’ve shat the day.


Does anyone know if Griffiths is with the squad in Dubai?


Interesting question. It would would be low risk for him I suppose.

The Cha

I would doubt it, as he’s meant to be taking a complete break for the foreseeable.

I also doubt if the management would want him around anyway, as it could only be a distraction.


They have a week off. They are not all on Dubai. Training starts Saturday


Rivaldo Coetzee?
Has this guy got back playing regularly again?


Caption: Billy practising his match ball stealing skills in an attempt to raise money for Sevco.


The Squad isn’t in Dubai, yet, they leave for that bastion of desert fitba. at the weekend, he, Griffith’s is still tying his Hibee scarf around the Hertz’s goalpost. AwenawnoAnnonianawe, Is John McGinn the most ever talked about Celtic player, that never played in the Hoops, his name has been mentioned more than three quarters the first team squad, only Boyata Fucking out, has been mentioned more. Speaking of the Strict Liability, I read somewhere that his agent said that he will not be signing a new Celtic contract and yet another not in the know said that he would… Read more »


John McGinn is mentioned because he is an excellent footballer & Celtic supporter, a player who should have been signed but wasn’t.
Celtic shouldn’t be losing out on transfers like this, players who WANT to come to Celtic.


Damn, another twice, what was I thinking about!


But and its a big but, is Christina “the Night Stalker” she prowls about after 1-00pm (when it begins to get dark) looking for drunken Huns and “Wallop” hit on the head, serves then right. As the clock is ticking about the scum bigoted racist’s attacks at the swamp and the silence remains as it always does, sphincters get clenched, necks wound down and the cloak of invisibility is worn by all members of the Celtic board. And bored we are of the silence of team bus attacks player assaults and well they are scum after all and scum is… Read more »


Mike-You been on the cooking sherry??:-) If I was the Night Stalker then, believe me, there would be some interesting disappearances being reported in the morning papers- starting wae that wee runt (changed first letter so’s not to offend Ralph) Morelos!! On a more serious note, I would really like to see some constructive chat on how we can get our useless Board to start standing up for our club! Our team bus was attacked on Saturday, ffs it could have been blown up for all the security it had, this is serious stuff! It is being played down, no… Read more »


No its not Charlie – you’re missing the point here -we had no protection! Police Scotland put up steel barriers ffs they knew that these supporters were not to be trusted. Bloody hell even UEFA know these fans are not to be trusted yet they were able to come within feet of our team bus and throw incendiary devices! It’s not about actual damage caused it’s about the fact they were not prevented from doing so – this country is supposed to be on high alert at big sporting events re terrorists so where the fk was the alleged high… Read more »


Right cooking sherry back on the shelf along with the dregs of the sheep dip, serious head turned facing the front. How can we order protest’s about the serious question of attracting the boards attention. To my mind there are only two forms of legitimate ways to organise this. One: Contact all the CSA’s through there secretary and ask him to contact all the individual CSA’ to ask for there input in making a protest to the board about the issues you mentioned, also include the C.T. I don’t think that contacting the supporters liason officer would do much good.… Read more »


Joe O’Rourke the secretary of the CSA, you could contact Joe at his London road Lair, Joe is a straight forward bloke who would be up for it. Jeannie with the light brown hair at the Celtic Trust another kindrid spirit, she, like yourself is an intelligent articulate person, who would want the same objectives. Gies a shout if you want too..

Yoker Bhoy

Great post Cristina – totally agree with all your points re the team bus incident. For the record, the only major difference between what happened in Buenos Aires a few weeks ago and the Ibrox incident was that players were physically harmed. A couple of hours before the kick-off for the final of La Copa de Libertadores (the South American version of the CL), the Boca Juniors team bus was pelted by bricks and stones hurled by a sizeable mob of River Plate supporting hooligans causing facial injuries and contusions to 3 or 4 of the Boca players, not to… Read more »


Well said Yoker bhoy and thank you for your educated and informed input. 😉

Yoker Bhoy

Cheers Mike – Valencia have a tough trip up north to play Alaves om Saturday. I’ll make a point of watching that one!


Are we going to go back in for Scott McKenna or are we looking at Man City’s development side?

Surely ” world class in everything we do ” would be to have tabled & matched the asking price for this player, 1 minute into the first of January?


Caption: Charlie Saiz is rendered speechless


Caption: Peter Lawwell once again conceals Resolution 12 as UEFA inspects latest Celtic Park developments.


” Bet ye didnae get yon in that Ann Summer’s catalogue”.


Caption, I said sit by the phone, not sit on the cone deafy.


Viktor Gyökeres 18 month loan.

Caption: Auchenowie pothole refilling now using alternative as the bullshit doesn’t work any more…




Sold: Dembele £19.7m
Sold: Armstrong £7m

Total: £26.7m

John McGinn….couldn’t do a deal.


Yup! Sums it up. Until Lawwell’s KPIs are linked to trophies it will always be that way.


hmmmm. given we won the last 7 trophies , he is entitled to that money by that logic.

winning trophies is the managers job.

lawell’s job is safeguarding the long term future of the club. which he does in the financial sense but not in the footballing sense.

as long as the club is feeding the PLC profit, then Lawell is going to make a fortune.

the bastard.

Caption,big peter tells his heated driveway workers where to go when they asked him for a living wage


John McGinn



I see Boyata & his agent starting the shite again….


Three days into the ‘ repair the damage done window ‘
Any bid for McKenna yet? No? How no?

” We aim to be world class in everything we do “

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