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Celtic Diary Friday December 29: Oh The Weather Outside is Frightful

Thats about right.

A four in the morning start tomorrow and everywhere is covered in snow.

Mind you, fair play to the council for clearing our street.

Image result for extreme snow

Including Glasgow, it seems.

When preparing for a long journey, its important to make sure you cover every eventuality. You may, quite literally, find yourself in a life and death situation.

  . #9 Fags

  .  #10Beer

The first is self explanatory, a cell phone charger on board means that if you find a phone, perhaps abandoned by someone who has already died, you can charge it up and use it.

The blankets and shovel can be used to hide his body. I wouldn’t bother with the extra jackets , boots and hats unless you are particularly prone to losing your clothes while you are wearing them.

Flashlights are always handy, as you can make wee shadow figures on the wall to help pass the time, and if that doesn’t take your mind off the predicament you are in, use the sand or grit to bury your head.

Jumper cables ? Well, if you are prone to losing your clothes then a couple of cables might help keep them within distance, and first aid ?

You are hurtling along a motorway at around 80 miles an hour, hit a patch of ice and go into a frighteningly rapid spin, bouncing over the central reservation before crashing into a truck on the other side, then a box of plasters and some antiseptic cream should contain the damage until the paramedics arrive.

I added numbers nine and ten, because as far as I’m concerned if you’ve had enough of #10, then you’ll probably sleep through the crisis, like little babies.

Number nine ? Well, what would the trip be if I couldn’t add a little danger ?

Over on twitter, the reliably practical Wee Amz suggested vodka, though I had my doubts, as a glass bottle may break should you lose your footings in difficult conditions, and that would mean your tongue got stuck to the pavement, making any sort of phone call difficult.

However, she claims that a plastic bottle of vodka, perhaps one of the less expensive brands, would suffice, and thats the sort of forward thinking that we need these days.

When the Lennon CSC elects a new bus convener, she’s in.

 

As you are probably aware, Celtic host fledgling club ” rangers ” tomorrow.

Scotlands newest club rose out of the considerable ash when sectarian giants Rangers finally found out that banks and tax inspectors won’t wait forever for the money due to them, and as a result went out of business.

Under normal circumstances, any assets would have been sold to pay the creditors, but in Scotland theres an unwritten rule that allows all assets to be placed into a basket and sold to dodgy businessmen .

From that basket came forth this new entity, and now, five years on, they are in a position to consolidate a top six place, but due to their creative financial practices, which have seen millions and millions of pounds poorly invested, face oblivion again.

Well, technically not again, but you get my drift.

To the support, who clung on to the new club in the belief it was still the old club, they’ll go under again, but to any right thinking and enlightened fellow, its their first time.

Its also the first time for me.

I’ve yet to see this new club and their support in the flesh at a game, so I’m looking forward to a genuinely new experience, and there aren’t many of them at my age.

A but like when one of my friends asked me if i was into older women . I used to be, but there aren’t that many around any more.

I’m hoping for a sporting match, with lots of handshakes and applause, perhaps a song or two, and yet i’ve a feeling that as the game begins, its the handshakes we’ll have to watch out for.

Bobby Madden and the SFA have yet to be called out for the somewhat unique decision to allow a supporter of one club referee the game,surely placing him under unnecessary pressure, and there’s something else, something which i fear may lead to a bigger problem tomorrow, especially if the result doesnt favour the new club.

Perhaps the most shameful episode in the history of the Celtic support was given an airing last night..

“Bananas are raining in on Walters.”

On 31st December 1987, Mark Walters signed for Rangers FC​. It was his most successful period as a player, but Mark had to endure racist abuse from Scottish football fans. More on Sportsound on BBC Radio Scotland on Thursday from 6:30pm.

Thast fair enough, and I have to be honest, I didn’t listen to the programme as Radio Scotland is difficult to pick up down here. One of the reasons I moved, in fact.

However, this subject needs to be addressed, and I’m quite sure that it covered not only the disgusting treatment of Walters, but that of Vic Kasule, Paul Wilson, Bobo Balde, and more recently, Scott Sinclair and Moussa Dembele.

The second episode will almost certainly cover the reluctance of Rangers, who before they were liquidated , operated a policy that entirely excluded one section of society on religious grounds, which was not only confined to the club, but present throughout the country in industry , education and housing.

BBC Scotland should be applauded for making a stand, and bringing all of this into the open so that it can be discussed, and Scotland can move on from and join the modern world.

And they should be praised for not timing the programme in such a way that the less cerebral support that has latched onto the new “rangers ” can somehow find it in their minds to even up the score with racist abuse tomorrow…

Image result for slow clap gif

 

The mainstream media have desperately tried to perpetuate the Old Firm myth, but the battles and bother of yesteryear has been toned down considerably. Largely due to the efforts of decent fans on both sides.

That doesn;t suit the marketing men, and to my mind there seems to be a nasty little undercurrent designed to cause bother tomorrow, so that they can harp on about it for a while yet, and perhaps even repackage  a fixture that simply isn’t the same any more.

Which is a good thing for us, but a bad thing for the media.

 

Virgil van Dijk is off to Liverpool, and every man and his dog is saying he’s not worth £75 million.

So what, as long as when he gets there his attempt at a  scouse accent is better than his uncles poor cockney effort in Mary Poppins, no one will care. Especially if he installs this kind of discipline to the back line.

Image result for Dick van dyke mary poppins gif

some papers are reporting that Celtic have contacted West Ham and asked if they are still interested in Dembele. Presumably the board want to punish him for something.

Davie Hay, writing for the Evening Times, isn’t panicking..

“I have a feeling he believes it is time to make the move but equally, if the right club does not emerge then I think he would be content to wait until the summer,”

“I cannot see that he will be creating a fuss behind the scenes because he doesn’t come across as that type at all.

“Like most players who are confident of their own ability, I think he understands that if he is performing on the European stage and coming up with the goods then he will always remain on the radar of other clubs.

“I suspect, too, that if he is allowed to go in January that there will be a replacement lined up.”

 

I don’t think there’s too much to worry about. We’ve always known he’d be a fleeting visitor, and when he goes, he goes with our best wishes.

Congratulations are in order for young Anthony Ralston as well. He’s just signed a new four and a half year deal to take over from Mikael Lustig at right back, when both are ready , of course…

“It’s a great feeling to sign with the club I’ve been with since I’ve been young. This is where I want to be and I want to start playing more games. I’ve enjoyed getting a taste of it and I’m looking forward to the future.

”It’s great, with the length of the contract, to have that out the way and I can focus on the football side of things. It’s a great feeling and I’m delighted.

“There are so many ups and downs that come with being a footballer. I’ve enjoyed the experiences I’ve had up to now. With the injury, it’s just one of these things that happen and it’s how you come back from it.

“But it’s been a good start for me in my career and signing the contract now, I’m just looking forward to getting on with my football over the next few years.” 

Celtic delighted as Anthony Ralston signs new contract extension

When Brendan Rodgers and Peter Lawwell were snapped on a flight back from London last week, it started a bit of tittle tattle about why they were down there.

Steven Caulker yesterday left QPR by mutual consent.

Steven Caulker has left by mutual consent with immediate effect. We wish him well for the future.

Just saying…

Now, its on the the Etims

 Knob Of The Week 

We’ve something a little special for you this week…

Keith Howells, of Peebleshire, whoever you may be..

Let me explain, actually, read this thread..

946440109087436800

Don’t ever doubt again that there is an unwritten narrative in the mainstream media..

Keith, I’ve no idea who you are, or if you even exist, but i’d like to award you the Etims

Knob Of The Week 

on behalf of those tireless people who work for a better world for all of us.

I’m sorry, I meant tiresome peepil who work for a better world for all of them.

Yesterday, you considered this..

Image result for andy walker celtic

Hugh Jainus December 28, 2017 at 10:34 am · Edit · Reply →

Clip: “OK, I’ve scored, but I looked a mile offside and Peter Grant should definitely have been booked in the first half” 

Today… a wee game…

Have a go, go on…

I’m willing to bet at least one answer will end up in the SMSM.

 

Afore ye go, as the whisky ad says-its that time of year again- here’s a heartfelt plea from a good Rangers man…

 

Because, of course there are no videos of his club beating them…well, there’s one, but that was the excpetion that makes the rule.

 

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Mike
6 years ago

At this time of year, its nice to remember.

Families and friends and players who have passed,
our love and their memories are destined to last,
we think of the fun and the excitement they gave,
their presence their humour that they took to their grave,
those memories we cherish those good times we save.

The real Anton Rogan
6 years ago

Apparently Juventus are ready to swoop for Niko Kranjcar in a cut price £3m deal.

Gary B
6 years ago

Kenny Miller to PSG for 3 mill.
You read it here first.

Pensionerbhoy
6 years ago
Reply to  Gary B

Gary B

“3 mill” – is that the size of the body tan bottle? 🙂

H H

Mike
6 years ago

As we look back on another footballing year,
although there is lots to like and lots to cheer,
nothing has improved and that is a fear,
the fitba. was good though sometimes quite bland,
while the SFA continues to bury its head in the sand.

The cheating and corruption continue to fester,
referees doing to look like court jesters,
The EBT issues are still not resolved,
even though everyone who was involved.

Celtic continue to strive for more glory,
but that only tells you the half of the story,
our supporters are great and continues to donate,
while other are obsessed with bile and with hate.

When oh when will the titles be stripped,
as openness and honesty and the truth are skipped,
while Celtic continue our incredible journey,
doing our best to win every tourney.

Kenny
6 years ago

Barry McKay to Arsenal for £3 million

Noelskytrot
6 years ago
Reply to  Kenny

Nah, Kenny. RB Leipzig are coming in with 6 million. Keef radar Jackson sticks by his source. What a walloper.

Frank M
6 years ago

Matt Crooks going nowhere as with a surname like that he is in exactly the right club.

Cortes
6 years ago

Rule 2 is ambiguous.

Do I make Harry Forrester head to Leipzig or to Spurs?

Monti
6 years ago
Reply to  Cortes

Swap deal with Harry Kane, mooted.

Mike
6 years ago

Goal line technology, Celtic gave every premier league team in Scotland £375,000 pounds by our participation in the C.L. next year they will get more from our participation this year and yet we cannot afford the £200, 000 pounds for installation in each ground.
Surely some company can do it for less per installation, an opportunity there for someone.

Martin67
6 years ago

Liverpool want Jordan Rossiter back for £6….you heard it here first Jim

Martin67
6 years ago

£6m but £6 is more realistic

Monti
6 years ago
Reply to  Martin67

It’s probably cost them £6m in medical fees.

Cartvale88
6 years ago

Now Klopp has done the business on Virgil, he realises that Mingulay is minging.

Fotheringhsm to sign for Liverpool on a higher transfer fee than that ex Celtic diddy

Only in today’s Daily Wanker fist with the sport news.

Never mind his grandchildren will be Celtic supporters, hope it is
7-0 for the good guys

Bognorbhoy
6 years ago

Jason ( lightning bolt ) Holt

Psg

5mill

BJF
6 years ago

Tad hard on Keith the SNO never mastered education, did all
right with Justice and Health but now struggling with latter especially since Nicola was transferred to Independence from it. Reorganisation of Police is an absolute disaster and did you read the comic book they prepared for Independence, clearly written by Level 5, good on effective but no evidence ( facts). By the way don’t complain about bringing politics into it, in the words of the immortal Basil Fawlty: “ you started it.”

Noelskytrot
6 years ago

The treatment of Walters at CP ws an absolute disgrace, but for any currant to try and take a moral stand well… I give you the disguting Famine song, the Billy Boys which eulogises a fascist and lets not forget the insidious BNP who’ve canvassed at the BigotDome in the past. In fairness my friends where over there handing out leaflets highlighting the racist agenda of the Football Lads Alliance a far right group who pretend they’re something else and got a fair response apart from my pal who wore a green jacket and was harangued by English Sevco fans.

For me personally, that mob are still stuck in the 17th century. They must do more, will it happen, will it fuck. The sense of self superiority holds them back and will continue to do so. Hopefully the sub culture of WATP etc will die sooner rather than later. Can’t see it happening in my lfetime, though.

Devoy45
6 years ago

Biffa Bacon to FC Kylie Minogue for £6 million. Buster Gonads out on loan to Racing Stripe Sovietski for £10 million and finally, Mr. Logic to Lokomotiv Smolensk on a free transfer. You read it first in the Daily Ranger.

Mike
6 years ago

The Man that never was,
a real “Rangers” man that made up Scottish fitba. laws,
deeply embedded in his Hampden tower,
the “Rangers” man who held all the power.

Shoosh noo, I tell yous no lies,
its all about the “Rangers, now that’s a surprise,
We arra peepil that’s all he cries,
“Regans” fake news mair lies and lies and lies.

Puggy67
6 years ago

Was playing Sevco Cluedo, it was Lee Wallace in the dining room with a string of sausages

jimmybee
6 years ago

To the Celtic family setting out today and tomorrow stay safe i hope you arrive in paradise safely and enjoy another hun skelping.
Bobby Madden should not be in charge of this game its as simple as that.
He is by far the worst of a bad lot. He wont have it in him to referee fairly. Its a terrible decision by the governing body.
Or is it ?
A goal not given to hibs which would have closed the gap on sevco and now a ref who openly supports rangers been given the glasgow derby.Looks like the lodges are at work again.
Celtic players will have to keep a cool head and not give him any oppertunity to give an honest mistake.
I think the game will be close only because of the officials appointed.
What a sad little bigoted country we live in.

Mike
6 years ago

Raisins at the ready, I heard it on the grapevine.

Mike
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

currant bums. 😉

Mike
6 years ago

They died and are on there way to the cemetery, no priests, no ministers, no candles, no graveside prayers, no flowers, no hymns, NOTHING. Just, liquidation!! BYE BYE.

Mike
6 years ago

Celtic versus Sevco, A new club, which lives in a shithole in the Govan area, with rabid supporters aided and abetted by the funny fingured brigade and the funny uniformed marchers, which army, the barmy army, no medals, no honour, no surrender, no shit.

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

Mike,are you trying to ruin Ralph’s big day.He’s so looking forward to it.It will be an eye opener for him.He should pop into the Louden before the game just to get a taste of what’s coming…..Surely after his 2 goals,KKK Void is due a move to the Sooside Scumbag Sectarian Orange Freemasonic Shower of Crooks “football” club/company……Signed Chris Satan…..

Mike
6 years ago

Amen corner, if paradise is half as nice, oh yeah, it is.

Mike
6 years ago

If anyone can, the klan can, can can. 😉

Mike
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

The House of the Dying Hun.

Broxburnbhoy
6 years ago

Delusional comment of the week “ Murty has a proven record against Celtic” – some daft sevconian reckons Murty has the taking of Brendan! After saying this he attended the flat earth society meeting, the global warming is a hoax society and the EU is a papist plot group organized by the DUP just add ed and you have it.

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago
Reply to  Broxburnbhoy

Murty(RC) has done a headstand and BR hasn’t,well not on the touchline so one up to Murts,suck it up Tims……Signed Baldy Bazza Right MadHun(ex-ST holder)…..

Monti
6 years ago

BREAKING NEWS: PSG has indicated it’s intention to sign James Tavernier in a 45m deal.
But they are going to use Ticketus to fund the move 🙂

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Is it a 45 metre dash? If it is,we’re in….Signed Ticketus Total Tubes….

Monti
6 years ago

Just thinking there of one of Minty’s moonbeams….’ the floating pitch ‘lol
Is it physically possible to have a floating pitch?

W.alloper.

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Yes,at Swinecastle……

Monti
6 years ago

Mikey Johnston is a young player i like the look of, part to play tomorrow?

Devoy45
6 years ago

Agree. Mikey has a lot of the same qualities as Forrest and Roberts. Great speed, ball control, runs at defenders, gallus. I would like him to be in tomorrow at some stage. He will need to fill in for Jonny Hayes, who was just coming onto his game.
Bobby Madden is a bad ‘un.

London Celtic
6 years ago

Please help!
Is the celtic v Huns live on celtic tv? I’m abroad. It says it has video of the game is this full coverage? Don’t want some commentary. Want to watch it in full. It’s£15 pounds to buy.
Many thanks

Hail Hail

Pensionerbhoy
6 years ago
Reply to  London Celtic

LC

The game is live as per usual weekly coverage as long as you are outside of UK and Ireland – I will not get into the Celtic/football politics or geography that does not regard Ireland as a foreign country. But there ye go, only in Scotland! I threw all my atlases in the bin when I signed up for CTV and wiped google maps of my internet. I think the SPFL thinks the world is still flat :). Enjoy the game. I hope it is worth £15! I will have to resign myself to listening to the made-up commentary of Cuddihy etc. What it means is 15 minutes about what is happening on the pitch and 1hr and 10 minutes talking crap about tactics and other non descriptive waffle – even from the great Jim Craig and Tom Boyd. Also, pray you get pictures as they have a habit of hiding them in the dark room till about 10 minutes to go 🙂 Seriously, I hope it a really good day all round.

As for all you other guys – lets not be too cocky. The picks came back to bite us once before. We do not want that or a Hearts stopper again.

Best wishes to all for 2018 as I probably will not be back on till the New Year.

H H

Pensionerbhoy
6 years ago
Reply to  Pensionerbhoy

“picks”!!!! RRRRRRRs!!! makes all the differenece between your legs.

H H

jimmybee
6 years ago
Reply to  Pensionerbhoy

All the best PB to you and yours.
May yer lums lang reek.

London Celtic
6 years ago
Reply to  Pensionerbhoy

Thanks for the info. But do they show the match live are talk about it like sky sports news does? Hail Hail.

Stevie D
6 years ago
Reply to  London Celtic

Isn’t it on BT Sports? My fiasco says she’s recording it for me. I always like to review things I was growling about at the game. I’m no always right.

jimmybee
6 years ago
Reply to  Stevie D

Sky has it m8

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago

London,it’s Celtic and it’s on Sky.Pub or Android box and you’re sorted.Phone me and I’ll provide the commentary,it’ll be slightly biased so be warned……

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago

Could I point out to the away supporters that Anthony Stoke’s dad is supplying the security for the toilets at your section tomorrow…….

Cortes
6 years ago

David Moss comes across as a sort of football equivalent of David Brent in the following Guardian article:

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2017/dec/29/david-moss-celtic-huddersfield-town-player-recruitment-expert

Devoy45
6 years ago

There once was a MIB named Bobby
who was really a Sevco jobbie.
His honest mistakes
were just piss takes
or some kind of Masonic hobby.

There once was a MIB named Madden
whose choice as a ref was a bad un
his decisons aren’t fair
they’ll favour the Bear
Sevco no offsides, for the Fenians— ten.

6 years ago

http://celticbynumberscom.ipage.com/selection-dilemas/

Celtic have selection decisions right through the spine for tomorrow’s Derby. Let’s take a look at the likely options using the performance data.

jimmybee
6 years ago

Cracking insight m8 i was wondering between jozo and ajer who had the best stats.
My main concern is no proper def midfielder you highlight this problem well.
We dont have a player whos first thought is to protect, all our midfielders even broony want to press in the opposition half. It costs us dear in europe nit so much domestically.
A lennon Wanyama type is sorely missed.
Maybe bitton could do it, but brendan seems to want to play without one.
Thanks for your work all the best when it comes.

6 years ago
Reply to  jimmybee

thanks. I suppose I see Brown as that player. He rarely gets forward now. He averages 0.12 possessions in the box per 90m which is the lowest in the squad. My concern is none of the others can play the same role. Kouassi is young and untested. So we have a real “key man” risk with Brown.

Puggy67
6 years ago

There once was a Brother called Bobby,
A sleekit, Masonic wee jobby.
Unless just like him
you are three degrees in
And falsehoods and lies
Are a hobby.

jimmybee
6 years ago

We will miss paddy and big tom tomorrow, i think the running power of armstrong and the cunningness of McGregor will be who Brendan goes for to start with.
Gordon
Lustig Boyata Ajer Tierney
Brown McGregor
Forrest Armstrong Sinclair
Dembele.
Honest mistakes will make it a tough one but class should tell. 3_1 the good guys.

6 years ago

The odd goal will do this kid hail hail madden the manky one worth a watchin

6 years ago

Of coures odd being 1.3.5.7

Noelskytrot
6 years ago

I sincerely hope that grannies, granda’s, ma’s and da’s weans, grandweans are crying into their Lionbrand fake Sevco clobber tomorrow. I want them humiliated and sent into abject misery forever. Get right into them Celtic and make my new year a very good one.

Noelskytrot
6 years ago

Can anyone tell me what the craic is on CQN about Madden? I can’t read it for pop ups.

Monti
6 years ago
Reply to  Noelskytrot

He’s an Orange cunt!

Noelskytrot
6 years ago
Reply to  Monti

Monti,

I was hoping you could tell me something new about Agent Orange, but yer absolutely right, he’s a jaffa cake, 100%

portpower
6 years ago
Reply to  Noelskytrot

G`day Noelskytrot

In short,whatever Madden`s puttin`on the game today at the bookies,follow follow.

Mike
6 years ago

About Madden apparently he is a gambler, not what you want in a so called referee, a hun gambling referee, only in Scotland, aided and abetted by the SFA. Is there an honest one….nope.

Noelskytrot
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

Cheers Mike. No suprise there, I wonder if he had the reptiles down for a score draw on his coupon during their last outing at CP when he blanked the penalty for the tackle on LG

Mike
6 years ago
Reply to  Noelskytrot

Nothing about him would surprise me, how can a referee ever be trusted
if he once held a season ticket at the bigot dome and now a gambler, he should be sacked….but will he?

jimmybee
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

I think you have to put the spotlight on who appointed him to be the match official.
Dallas and his band of brothers are desperate, Madden simply should not be in charge of this game. Its a delibrate ploy by the governing body to stop the champions. They will not succeed their days are numbered.

jimmybee
6 years ago
Reply to  Mike

I think hes just useless m8. He should never be anywhere near this fixture and its just a get it up you move from that fuck Dallas and his band of brothers. The people who have assigned him this game need removed he is in an impossible position before a ball is kicked.
Its a disgrace and a delibrate ploy by the governing body to try and influence a match they know that their team cant win by honest means.

Mike
6 years ago

Masons have their aprons,
funny marchers have their flutes,
but fermers have their flocks,
and its a well known fact you know,

that they have the largest….
crops.

jimmybee
6 years ago

Heres some festive cheer from that man billy no well.
https://youtu.be/54kG_9soWwg

jimmybee
6 years ago

Big Sammy at his finest giving us a happy new year.
https://youtu.be/ofz-EZ40_sw

jimmybee
6 years ago
Monti
6 years ago
Reply to  jimmybee

Thanks comrade!

Devoy45
6 years ago

Celtic by Numbers. Fantastic work. You are providing a wonderful service for us fans. How do you do it? Many, many thanks. Football analysis at its very best. I especially liked the conclusion that Armstrong and Ntcham together, somewhere in the lineup, is most effective. I hope Brendan reads this.

6 years ago

Walter wore his old blue jeans as he watched poor ally’s run
The only one who ran away from the house of the dying hun
There is park down govan way they call the dying slum
It’s been the ruin of many’s career Dave King, Craig Whyte who’s now a bum

portpower
6 years ago

Enjoy the Grand day Ghirls and Bhoys.We deserve it.
What a year it`s been. Accolades deservingly accomplished.HH

Their parked bus`s on bricks.
72nd walk-out by the skelped huns.

Celts by 4.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBCFA_zX9as

portpower
6 years ago

It`s just another game to Celtic.

Why all the hun hype?

We are the Puffery.

portpower
6 years ago

Today`s line-up.

Hunskelper

Hunskelper Hunskelper Hunskelper Hunskelper

Hunskelper Hunskelper

Hunskelper

Hunskelper Hunskelper Hunskelper

Subs:Hunskelper,Hunskelper,Hunskelper,Hunskelper,Hunskelper.

Rob O'Keeffe
6 years ago
Reply to  portpower

Oops…..

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