Celtic Diary Tuesday February 28; New Kit For Inverness Game

With the recent rumbustery against the Highland side, a concerned Celtic manager has given the nod for the fourth kit to be worn tomorrow night in a bid to make sure all of his players get home without stopping off for an x-ray.

Image result for full body armour suit

Although it may limit some of the speedier passing and movement the suit is deceptively flexible and probably won’t make that much difference, as Inverness are not noted for their own footballing skills so the plan is to score early and knock the shit out of the opposition, which is exactly the same tactic adopted by the northerners, if you don’t count the bit about scoring.

Modern day players come in for a lot of criticism regarding their relative fragility, but in fairness the injuries suffered of late by Celts are hardly of the broken fingernail type, and its time something was done to put a stop to it.

As soon as the first assault takes place tomorrow, the players need to be in the referees face. Brown needs to ask for protection, and imply that the players will look after themselves should it not be put in place.

Otherwise, someone else will get hurt.


It’s farewell to Efe Ambrose, we think, as Hibernian offer him a run out as he runs his contract down. This, of course, sets the scene for him to play the game of his life against Celtic in a Cup semi final or final, deny us a treble and send a large two fingered salute to all who doubted him.

You know thats how it’s going to end up. Still, he goes with our best wishes, and who knows, maybe he’ll do exactly the same thing to another Glasgow club if they meet first in the semi.

Ambrose was never shy of putting himself about, not always where the ball was, and we could have used him as a sort of expendable to get a message across to opponents, but its not to be.


There’s been a few daft rumours floating around of late, and you know they’re daft when they haven’t come from someone who has a certain odour and a certain slur, so hopefully no-one is taking any notice of them.

Dundee United going onto administration ? Very unlikely, although they are losing money, they have cut their cloth in case they don’t re-join the top league. Funny how this particular Scottish institution, and others such as Hibernian, Falkirk and Dunfermline aren’t the beneficiaries of possible league reconstruction like another institution was just a short while ago.

If clubs are struggling, then its the duty of the SFA/SPFL to help out, but then again, if the club isn’t of a certain heritage, a a blind eye is turned.

The thing is , most Scottish clubs have adjusted to the current climate, and if it wasn;t for the huge degree of ineptitude in the governing bodies, then they’d actually be quite well off.

An inability to sell the game to TV and others has crippled income streams, and its about time they got a real marketing man in. Though the media could help as well, as it wouldn’t hurt to focus on the good things once in a while, instead of parking outside Baryy Fergusons house in the hope that he’ll say something coherent.

By the way, he won;t be getting the Ibrox job. even they know he’s shite, and he didn’t resign from Clyde, not in the “oh please don;t go ” sense, it was more of a “thank fuck, shut the door behind you ” sense. Ferguson may have “made himself available ” for the job, but has obviously been ignored or rebuffed, as he told the BBC;

“I’ve still got loads to learn. I don’t think I am ready to manage at that level,”  

He wasn’t ready for Blackpool or Clyde either, and his failure in the Scottish fourth tier suggests that his best bet is to ask a local coach of they need someone to help put the nets up before games, or pass round the half time lager.

Graeme Murty looks set to be in charge over there for the trip to Celtic Park, and the poor sod is fully aware of how that might end up. All this talk of bringing in a director of football and a top class manager is simply to keep the club in the headlines whilst the directors fill in various payday loan application forms, all of which are declined because they struggle with the bit that lists incomings and outgoings.

He’s not ready to manage at “that level ” either, but he’s a they can afford right now, so they have to make do. and anyway, his personal history means they can blame a taig when it all goes tits, which helps shift season books in a few months, the money which is now needed to finance the mass exodus of the board, and pay for their security guards.

An idea of the deflection in place right now comes in a statement from club 1872, who had demanded answers from the board, but were fobbed off this week, which they seem to have accepted;

Back at the ranch, and the weekend update on the illness affecting Billy McNeill and his family has prompted manager Brendan Rodgers to call for an investigation into the link between headinga ball and the various forms of dementia.

“I’d like to see that happen – 100 per cent.

“It would be worth seeing what the findings are and if the McNeill family is open to that, then it’s a good step. 

“We’ve seen the balls in the museums with the big laces on them and if you had to head that…

These days, the balls are a lot lighter, and don;t hold water the way the old leather one’s would. The danger isn;t the same, but as with any repetitive action, all possible consequences should be examined, although its doubtful what could be done about it now.

The press were on the ball again recently, reporting on this story. no need to name the paper, suffice to say they just can’t bring themselves to do anything right where Celtic are concerned .

They must have got their pictures mixed up, because it cannot possibly be down to the limited level of competence among the papers staff.



Surprisingly though, this isn’t the same paper, though it may have been the same sub editor…


Meanwhile, despite their astonishing fundraising efforts, and their donation of £1967 to a Scottish alzheomers charity, there was bad news for the Green Brigade…It appears the original Green Brigade, from the seventeenth century, where a sizable part of Glasgow still resides, were not Celtic minded at all…

Well, shut the whole thing down and start again. Astoundingly, those who call us obsessed, couldn’t wait for the “Timplosion ”


Surely “those ” intellectual catholic ex pupils….and there are two letters missing from “your ” as well.

The sort of mentality that knows exactly whats wrong with their club…


There was no caption competition yesterday, it didn;t seem right whilst writing about Billy McNeill, so we go back to Saturday for this delightful picture

Immediately summed up…

Dziekanowski’s nightclub child February 25, 2017 at 8:30 am · Edit · Reply

Caption: The new blazers turn up at the SFA to discuss the unseen problem   


And now, something completely different.


Well, not that different, when you think about it.

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Efe is out!


Wisnae me

Was that your caption competition entry?


Bahahahahahahahahahaha! That’s hilarious! however I’m sure you’ve pissed the big man off implying such things…..




Pope Benedict XV1 Young Mental Team.

circa 1933.

Cant see Efe being allowed to play against us and probsbly banned from the Cup altogether. Nice for Hibs to book an acrobat early for the League win celebrations mind


I’ll try this angle again!!

Auchenhowie starlets practice choreography!


Auchenhowie? It’s Murray Park, don’t let them whitewash their history.


Good luck Big Efe, but not against us, if it ever happens.

Mike Annis

So Efe effed off. Good luck to the smiler.

Caption: Early pic of the Royal Family on their yearly visit to meet the plebs.


The Saint Etienne bike arrives in Glasgow to a dubious welcome from some locals.


Hun youth team pointing out another moonbeam.

Rob O'Keeffe

Caption:The “press”outside Barry’s EBT house.

Beggar dome? We’re loaded you bam! We’ve got 2 genuine billionaire shareholders.Bring on the 12th! No Monti,not that one,take it easy big man.

Heil! Heil! The Celts are here. All for goals and glory now.


Caption: Agent Murty infiltrates Third Reich.


Caption: “Would you like to be part of the Rangers team as a volunteer on matchdays? – If you are over 18…. (erm… urgh … ah.) inches”


No thanks Mr.Struth 🙂


Caption: The SEVCO youths (pictured above) blaming the banks for the devaluation of their club are always on the lookout for some juice to smoothie out their misguided hatred.


So if we convinced the crown court that this “rangers” was that Rangers then the court would want ALL the tax money and this “rangers” would have to pay the face painters. Now surely this “rangers” would also have to be paid back all of those loans from the EBT receivers over the years while the taxman chases them for the money. So in proving they were the same club we would be ruining the current iteration and every arsehole who ever recieved an EBT.

Tam the tim

The Sandy Row branch of the hitler youth belt out the sash.


The Green Brigade – that Facebook comment: the 30 Years War wasn’t solely a Protestant-Catholic conflict; it was as much about power and politics in the Holy Roman Empire (mostly over the power of the Hapsburgs in Germany and Bohemia). If it was, then we would not have seen France providing subsidies to the Swedes and fighting themselves against the Imperial Army; and by the way there were protestant Scottish soldiers fighting on the ‘catholic’ side too. So it is always best to know all of your history. not half-truths, myths or legends.

it seems from the article that were just known as Green Briagde. that why the modern bhoys are known as THE Green Brigade. as hey are not the same green brigade but a new incarnation of the body.


Ambrose was a complete clown of a player, fucking useless and totally inept.
I hope Hibs fans have steady nerves, they are about to be tested.


john young

I liked the ghuy,he gave his all and was inmo very unlucky,there were a lot worse than Efe masquerading.Good luck to him.


Pish he is shit


Wonder which current Celtic player shall become his whipping boy.


Do you like talking about whipping boys on internet forums?


Come on Monti he is going there to sit in the Anchor man role and be solid in front of their defense to allow the other mid-fielders to bomb forward. We all know just how amazing a holding mid-fielder he is.


Imagine the overlap play from the fullbacks with the knowledge that the World Cup experienced Nigerian wall is back there to cover for them.


Not only that, imagine the frustration of oppsition attackers as they close Efe down quickly, in the knowledge he will never miscontrol the ball or give up possession needlessly.
Sorry Hibs fans, didn’t deliberately use the word needles there.




Imagine how unsettling for defenses knowing that Big Efe will be up there heading in goal after goal if they put the ball out for a corner.




The young Billy boys practice their masonic hand signals.
WIsh Efe the very best, hope it goes well at the Hibees Bitton has shown a heart of gold, good luck to the wee lassie.

The Huns are so stupid, the beggerdome, surely that’s Ibrokes


Oh I”ve been a pullover for many a year,
and I spent all my money on Celtic and beer
and its no nay never, never nay mair,
will I wear a pullover no never naymair.

Vardy ya tosspot, no buying a car anymair from yous. Cloudia, in excelsis deo.


Afternoon Micheal…..


Kung foo Efe,

Oh he”s Deek McKay of the HLI,
shake hands with his sister Pat,
if he puts up anymair taxes,
I”ll shoot the dirty rat.


Both of you would be well served to read all the posts….


Must be a big pullover to pull it over that conk…..Gonzo.


Jelly Belly,
his feet are awfy smelly,
he luvs ice cream and jelly,
his faither”s George Mellie.
or is it George Michael?

And the winner is…. lalalalahahahahand!!!!.


Caption: Buckingham Palace celebrate the outbreak of war.


Please God let Efe score against the Orcs so we can see their raging faces as they blame another timmy conspiracy for ruining their season.


Caption: ” Bomber Harris to bomber command, there they are, enemy in sight, one of them cycling with what appears to be an RPG….can i fire fire fire”

Bomber command -” Fire at will sir, no prisoners”

Harris -” yes yes yes…oops oh ok bombs away “


james forrest, 68% final ball accuracy, highest in the team… thought he couldnt cross??


Bgbhoy James Forrest has been sensational this season, he has learned to cross again not only with his right foot, but ha can also play a ball with his left foot! I had forgotten why everyone said he had so much potential, but there he is, the James Forrest we had so much hope for!


hes holed up in an igloo with ronny


God did you have to use the word holed?


Caption: Fredcdobbs (far left) looks at the other, bigger boys and wishes he was taller in order to not feel isolated.



Isolated my arse! He knows if his hair turns dark and he doesn’t get taller soon he will get sterilized for not looking like a RRM.


Im famous at last and heres a couple of fuckwits to prove it.

well done lads.



mr greene


Your Great Grandchildren will be Celtic Fans .


Oh I’ve been a chiel faermer for monies a year,
And I’ve spent all me money on Celtic and beer,
I’ll return to me faerm, wae ma wellies and hose,
But I can’t see ma crops for ma big bloody nose,


An it’s nose nae never,
Can’t drive ma tractor no more,
I cannae see-ee-ee-ee ma fences,
Nose never no more.

I returned to ma tatties on a field that I kent,
but I drove in a tree noo ma tractors well bent,
When the bobby arrived and he saw fit I’d done,
He said haein’ a big hooter, it cannae be fun,



Oh his name is ??? Uralius and he”s the leader of the band,
his posts are pish and he lives in la la land,
anymair of his pish and he”l feel the back of my hand.

AND the winner is? la la land.


Mike wid be served no tae go pickin’,
a lyric aff wi’ someone who’ll hand oot a kickin’
Yer writing’s no bad for man who’s half blin.
coz yer hooter’s as big as a fat flightless puffin.




hahaha nae chance basque in ma shadow.

The moons a balloon, so said my friend David Niven,
mike”s lyrics the best and that’s a given,
so shut yer pus, or oot, youl be driven.


One cannot Basque, for your “rhymes” are but prose,
In fact I would say that your rhyming blows,
When you read them out loud your lyrics are forced,
Your so called rhyming is sore and divorced,
This Master’s creation has rhythm and flows.
The only shadow that’s cast is the one from your nose.


Bill Mcphail(Mr 7 -1)the greatest header of a football you ever seen had dementia,he pursued it through the courts and lost.

Rob O'Keeffe

Flinker,I give you One James McGrory (pure legend) as the best header of a ball,used to score headers harder than other players’ shots.You younger Celts check out his stats and available footage.Superb.Nobody kicked the s.it out of him!


The Boynes from Britain.


I hope the Arabs story is right enough and that Thompson is minded that there is a very recent precedent to follow, in such circumstances.


Dundee Utd chairman was here in Australia a few months ago wanting to buy ( correct me if am wrong Portpower) Central Coast Mariners. Would e surprised if they were goin inti admin attempting an overseas purchase with the ok fae SFA.


The Dundee utd chairman couldn’t afford to buy Lochee Mariners, never mind central coast!


johann murdoch

Caption-UKIP under12s show off new “brownshirt” away kit!


Then the Rangers ball boys said “Up there, a bit of the main stand is falling off!”


C/O Arsene Parcelie.

comment image


The tax case is up soon as as expected if they Oldco is found guilty then it will be time to ask for those tainted titles and cups as well as prize money to be given up to the runners up. If the EBTs did indeed provide a sporting advantage then this is simple cheating and like in athletics or cycling titles should be stripped and handed to the runners up since they played by the rules. I feel no asterisk ought to be applied when one plays by the rules and ends up loosing because of cheating. Yes medals… Read more »


shut yer pus broxi.




Broxi bear?


Awoa and diny gies yir pish mun!




Off topic, but just been reading a cracking book on Burke & Hare ( by Owen Dudley Edwards )apparently they ventured as far as Broxburn.

Then again, they were accused of being ressurectionists / body snatchers. Now if sevco signed 2 players Burke and Hare. Oh the mirth.
anyhoo, nuff shite fae me the day.



Thank fuck for that!

Lest we forget young Roddy McCorley executed this day for his courage in the battle of Antrim.
The first song I learned to play on my grandas accordian.
Ahh the memories around the old coal fire. Happy days.

Caption : Sevco try all they can to get 6 million from Leipzig for Barry Mackay,and try some traditional folk music to get a deal done.
Stupid Silly Huns !!!!!!

Dziekanowski's nightclub child

Caption: armed forces day at Ibrokes comes around quickly these days


holed holed holed, holi holi holi,

Yes my sun!!!

Rob O'Keeffe

Told you M,he’s brown breid ! Another Son of Strewth bites the dust.

Get McGhee in at Sevco in time for the 12th so we know it’s going to be 9.HH


Caption: The Apprentice Boys decide to come out in support of His Glibness.


Disgraceful state of affairs, St. Mary’s vandalized.


a wish big efe well in fitba sometimes yer style disnae fit and big efe got the blame for other guys mistakes but ile never forget the joy in that kids face when he scored for the celtic best a luck tae the bhoy so shut tae fuck up montivani


anybody who pulled on that jersey deserves respect and anycunt who disnae see that really needs tae get a fuckin grip COYBIG




that bhoy efe gets the celtic


sometimes in life things dont work oot the wae ye want but if efe aint a tim in hees heart yees can awe kiss ma fenian arse


ime no wan for gettin carried away but the press in this shit hole would let this happen again


we need tae toughen up for next summer when we won the big cup the last time scottish fitba stole joe mc bride aff us and them sick fuckers are still plottin its time for the auld retaliate first ya daftie as 10 30 would say

Tam Hickey

The wee boy on the right is pointing away and saying “Bugger off ya mad mental Muppets, there’s a far better team in the East end of the city. This mob you want to Follow, Follow are Mental cases that we wouldn’t want to be associated with”


some ae use aulder guys will remember heidin the auld bladders ful a water and the laces billy mc phail was was one ae the first to bring up that it could cause that dementia


me and mrs charlie were at a weddin 2weeks ago and i was being a wee bit rumbustious and she said charlie a think yoov got a bitty yon distemper a think it was cause a was trying tae shag the brides leg ha ha ile let yees no thats a joke in case mike the fermer starts askin for a invite tae oor doos


mike while yoos fermers were bothering sheep this is what city tims dae he he ya fuckin nutjob ime stealin yoor sheep next week jeest tae cause a traffic jam at glesga cross


this wan is for me and monti but if he slags efe again i reserve the right tae withdraw that statement


ime tellin yoos crackpots ime gonny meet yoos for a swally someday as long as yoos dae the time he he ha ha


Just dinnae bring Efe with ye……he’ll spill his pint all over ye 🙂


heers wan for any human being who hisnae been hame for a wee while


by the time yees read this ile be givin it zzzzzzzzzs but fuckit ile leave it on repeat ive got lovely neighbours

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